XPost: alt.fan.barbra.streisand, can.politics, alt.politics.democrats   
   XPost: alt.fan.j-garofalo   
   From: rlewis@N0SPAM.0RG   
      
   Dem Beliefs - A party primer. Liberals are stupid!   
      
      
      
   October 06, 2003, 8:51 a.m.   
   Dem Beliefs - A party primer.   
   Rich Lowery   
   National Review Editor   
      
   A presidential primary is a way for a political party to make up its   
   mind. Through the process of nominating a candidate, a party figures   
   out its stances on the new issues and what adjustments, if any, it   
   will make in its positions on the old. So with that, through their   
   collective rhetoric and actions, the ten Democratic  candidates have   
   arrived at the outlines of a rough philosophy - the credo of the   
   Democrats of '04.   
   	   
   This credo is often nonsensical and hypocritical, but it is clearly   
   discernible. The Democrats of '04 believe:   
      
   That wars should be authorized, but never fought.   
      
   That the United Nations is the world's last, best hope, and every jot   
   of its writ should always be respected, unless it inconveniences   
   Saddam Hussein.   
      
   That nation-building is always a humanitarian and just cause, unless   
   it is undertaken in Iraq.   
      
   That anyone who said Saddam had weapons of mass destruction prior to   
   the war was lying, unless his or her name is Bill Clinton, Al Gore,   
   Madeleine Albright, Bill Cohen, John Kerry, or Joe Lieberman, or the   
   person ever served in the Clinton cabinet or as a Democratic senator.   
      
   That French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin is always right.   
      
   That President Bush isn't devoting enough resources to the   
   reconstruction of Iraq, and that - in light of his $87 billion aid   
   proposal - he is devoting far too many resources to the reconstruction   
   of Iraq.   
      
   That George Bush maneuvered the United States into war in an act of   
   manipulative genius, and also is very stupid.   
      
   That [fill in blank with latest conflict here] is another Vietnam.   
      
   That the U.S. military is overextended - and should be smaller.   
      
   That unilateral U.S. diplomatic pressure is always wrong, unless it is   
   brought to bear on Israel.   
      
   That it is absolutely necessary for the cause of clean government for   
   candidates to abide by the limits set by the presidential   
   public-financing system, unless they - like Kerry and Howard Dean -   
   have enough money not to.   
      
   That big money corrupts politics, unless it is big money raised by   
   California Gov. Gray Davis.   
      
   That punch-card ballots are a travesty of justice, unless they elect a   
   Democrat.   
      
   That groping is a minor offense of no interest to feminists, unless a   
   Republican candidate is the groper.   
      
   That independent-counsel investigations are travesties of justice,   
   unless they probe leaks in a Republican White House.   
      
   That Bush is bankrupting the federal government, but is a tightfisted   
   ogre for countenancing only a $400 billion new prescription-drug   
   benefit.   
      
   That Bush is fiscally profligate, but isn't spending enough on   
   education, "first responders," health care or anything else not called   
   "defense."   
      
   That the nation cannot afford the pending retirement of the baby   
   boomers, but the baby boomers should get more benefits for their   
   pending retirements.   
      
   That Bush is responsible for an economic downturn that began before he   
   was elected and that Clinton is responsible for an economic recovery   
   that began before he was elected (here at last - a kind of   
   consistency!).   
      
   That small-business owners are the heart of the economy unless they   
   succeed, at which point they become "the rich."   
      
   That it is evil to be rich, unless you got that way by marrying Teresa   
   Heinz.   
      
   That it is wrong to be a millionaire, unless you got that way by suing   
   people.   
      
   That the sons of the upper-crust Northeastern elite are always and   
   everywhere out-of-touch, unless they are named Howard Dean.   
      
   That it is unseemly to mix military matters with politics, but you   
   should vote for FORMER GENERAL Wesley Clark, and salute when you do   
   so.   
      
   That a deranged candidate should not be elected president, unless he   
   is named Bob Graham.   
      
   That no child should be left behind, unless it is in an urban   
   public-school system.   
      
   That no child should be left behind, unless it is in the womb.   
      
   That the Patriot Act is denying Americans their liberties, and John   
   Kerry, Joe Lieberman, John Edwards, or Bob Graham should be elected   
   president after having voted for it.   
      
   That deposing John Ashcroft would be preferable to deposing Mullah   
   Omar.   
      
   That library records are sacred, but the Constitution - a "living   
   document" subject to manipulation by judges - is not.   
      
   --Rich Lowry is author of the upcoming Legacy: Paying the Price for   
   the Clinton Years.   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)