XPost: alt.politics.socialism, alt.politics.economics, alt.politics.media   
   From: efreem2@alumni.umbc.edu   
      
   An elderly woman was caught shoplifting. The store owner thought she   
   had been shoplifting for some time, and finally caught her at it. At   
   trial, she pleaded guilty and threw herself on the mercy of the court.   
   The judge asked, "What did you steal?" "A can of peaches." "Why did you   
   steal them?" "I am too poor to afford peaches but really love them, so   
   I took them." "How many peaches were in the can?" "The label said   
   'six'." The judge frowned, cleared his throat, and pronounced the   
   sentence: "You stole six peaches, so I sentence you to six days in   
   jail."   
      
   As the gallery gasped at the severity of the sentence, her husband   
   stood up in the back of the courtroom and asked if he could say a few   
   words. "Certainly," replied the judge, "if they are relevant." "Doesn't   
   the police record show that she also stole a can of peas?"   
      
   *.*   
      
   Be thankful for problems. If they were less difficult,   
   someone with less ability might have your job.   
      
      
   If you spend all of your time looking back at yesterday,   
   you are destined to trip over tomorrow.   
      
      
   If the president of the USA has to be a natural-born citizen,   
   could a test-tube baby ever be president?   
      
      
   Even though a marriage is made in heaven,   
   the maintenance work has to be done here on earth.   
      
   *.*   
      
   Oneliners:   
      
   As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?   
      
   Democracy makes a lot of sense unless the majority of people are fools.   
      
   Profanity: The linguistic crutch of inarticulate jerks.   
      
   It's the people who ask for loans that you don't want to lend money to.   
      
   There's one good thing about being wrong. It brings joy to others.   
      
   Do those fossils found in Ethiopia mean that we're all African-American?   
      
   Until recently, I thought I was someone I knew.   
      
   Listeners are in such short supply that shrinks make $80 an hour.   
      
   Your plastic surgeon has such a delightful sense of humor   
      
   Middle age:  when your weight lifting consists solely of standing up.   
      
   *.*   
      
   When Ben Franklin suggested the turkey for national bird,   
   and the eagle was chosen instead   
   . . . the turkeys all became politicians.   
      
      
   When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper,   
   do you think he wonders   
   why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?   
      
      
   You know there is a problem with the education system   
   when you realize that   
   out of the three Rs, only one begins with an R.   
      
      
   If a small thing has the power   
   to make you angry,   
   does that not indicate something about your size?   
      
      
   I took a bunch of pictures while on my vacation in Canada.   
   Due to the exchange rate, however,   
   they're each only worth about 700 words.   
      
      
   It seems like back in biblical times, according to the bible,   
   a lot of people sat on their asses   
   and rode everywhere, not much different than nowadays.   
      
      
   Experience is a wonderful thing.   
   It enables you to recognize a mistake   
   when you make it again.   
      
   *.*   
      
   He/She   
      
   My wife left me . . . I don't understand.   
   After the last child was born,   
   she told me we had to cut back on expenses.   
      
   I had to give up drinking beer.   
   I wasn't a big drinker, maybe a 12-pack on weekends.   
      
   Anyway, I gave it up but I noticed the other day   
   that when she came home   
   from grocery shopping, the receipt included $45 in makeup.   
      
   I said, "Wait a minute I've given up beer   
   and you haven't given up anything!"   
      
   She said, "I buy that makeup for you, so I can look pretty for you."   
   I told her, "Hell, that's what the beer was for!"   
      
   I don't think she'll be back.   
      
      
   A Woman's Poem   
      
   He didn't like the casserole   
   And he didn't like my cake.   
   My biscuits were too hard...   
   Not like his mother used to make.   
      
   I didn't perk the coffee right   
   He didn't like the stew,   
   I didn't mend his socks   
   The way his mother used to do..   
      
   I pondered for an answer   
   I was looking for a clue.   
   Then I turned around and smacked him...   
   Like his Mother used to do.   
      
   Issue of the Times;   
   The Great Housing Crash of '07 By Mike Whitney   
      
   This month's figures prove that the so-called "housing bubble" is not only   
   real, but that its cratering faster than anyone had realized. As the UK   
   Guardian reported just yesterday, "the orderly housing slowdown predicted   
   by   
   the Federal Reserve will (soon) become a full-blown crash".   
      
   All the indicators are now pointing in the wrong direction. Consumer   
   confidence is down, inventory is at a 10 year high, and the number of   
   homes   
   sold in July was 22% lower than last year. As Paul Ashworth, chief   
   economist   
   at Capital Economics said, "Things seem to be getting worse very quickly.   
   Freefall is a strong word, but I think it's the right one to use here."   
   (UK   
   Guardian)   
      
   The housing bubble is a $10 trillion equity balloon that will explode   
   sometime in 2007 when more than $1 trillion in no-interest, no down   
   payment,   
   adjustable-rate mortgages (ARMs) reset; setting the stage for massive home   
   devaluation, foreclosures and unemployment. ("By some estimates housing   
   activity has accounted for 40% of all the jobs created since 2001". Times   
   Online) July's plunging sales are just the first sign of a major slowdown.   
   The worst is yet to come.   
      
   The blame for this rapidly-approaching meltdown lies entirely with the   
   Federal Reserve, the privately-owned collection of 10 central banks who   
   cooked up a way to shift wealth from one class to another through low   
   interest rates.   
      
   Sound crazy?   
      
   Well, just as high interest rates cause the economy to slow down; low   
   interest rates have the exact opposite effect by stimulating the economy   
   through increased spending. It's all pretty clear-cut.   
      
   When the stock market nose-dived in 2000 the Fed lowered rates 17 times to   
   an unbelievable 1% to keep the economy sputtering-along while the Bush   
   administration dragged the country to war, gave away $450 billion a year   
   in   
   tax cuts, and awarded zillions in no bid contracts to their friends in big   
   business. All tolled, the Bush-handouts amounted to roughly $3 trillion   
   dollars, the largest heist in history, and it was carried out under the   
   nose   
   of the snoozing American public.   
      
   At the same time, America's debts and deficits have continued to mushroom   
   behind the smokescreen of low interest rates.   
      
   Rather than face the recession which should have followed stock market   
   crash, the Fed chose to increase the money supply (which doubled in the   
   last   
   7 years) and lower the qualifications for getting mortgages. (I read   
   recently that 90% of first time home buyers not only lie on their mortgage   
   applications, but that 50% of them say that they earn TWICE as much as   
   they   
   really do. The applications are not cross-checked with IRS statements)   
   Now,   
   tens of thousands of Americans live in $400,000 and $500,000 homes without   
   a   
   penny of equity in them and with loans that are timed to increase   
   dramatically in 2007. (Many of the monthly payments will double)   
      
   So, how can we blame the Fed for the reckless and irresponsible behavior   
   of   
   the average homeowner?   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)