XPost: alt.politics.socialism, alt.politics.economics, alt.politics.media   
   From: efreem2@alumni.umbc.edu   
      
   Subject: Best quote from the liberal bating fad in rec.humor   
      
   If guns are outlawed, what will we shoot liberals with?   
      
   *.*   
      
   To your good health ...............   
      
   My doctor reckons I'm paranoid. Well, he didn't actually say it, but   
   that was what he was thinking!   
      
   Brain cells come and go but fat cells live forever   
      
   You don't offended when you pick your nose in a plastic surgeon's office   
      
   Let's keep this diet stuff simple; meat is food - everything else is   
   food for the food   
      
   My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.   
      
   I used to have a drinking problem. Now I love the stuff   
      
   Chocolate is an honorary vitamin   
      
   Non-smokers die every day.   
      
   Don't follow your doctor's advice to stop drinking because there are   
   lots more old drunks than old doctors   
      
   *.*   
      
   The trouble with owning your own home is that,   
   no matter where you sit,   
   you're looking at something that needs to be done.   
      
      
   Insurance is something that costs you thousands of dollars   
   so that when you're dead,   
   you'll have nothing to worry about.   
      
      
   Golf balls are like eggs. They're white.   
   They're sold by the dozen   
   and a week later you have to buy more.   
      
      
   Nowadays, there aren't just the *haves* and the *have-nots.   
   There is a 3rd group . . . the   
   haven't-paid-for-what-they-haves!   
      
   *.*   
      
   Snowflakes are one of natures most fragile things,   
   but just look what they can do when they stick together.   
      
      
   Sign over the urinal in a bathroom at Hebrew University:   
   "The future of the Jewish people is in your hands."   
      
      
   The greatest tragedy is when a man gives up what he wants most   
   for what he wants now!   
      
   *.*   
      
   Oneliners   
      
   I would be normal . . . but I had a family   
      
   I was watching David Copperfield ... and my T.V. disappeared   
      
   Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret   
      
   Jell-O is just Kool-Aid with a hard-on.   
      
   Profanity is the crutch of inarticulate @ssholes.   
      
   The world is round; it has no point.   
      
   Some people are discovered, others are found out.   
      
   Myth: A female moth   
      
   An escalator can never break, it can only become stairs.   
      
   I must be getting old. About half the stuff in my shopping cart says -   
   For Fast Relief.   
      
   Issue of the Times;   
   3000 American Deaths in Iraq by Ron Paul   
      
   Mr. Speaker, Saddam Hussein is Dead. So are Three Thousand Americans.   
      
   The regime in Iraq has been changed. Yet victory will not be declared: not   
   only does the war go on, it's about to escalate. Obviously the turmoil in   
   Iraq is worse than ever, and most Americans no longer are willing to   
   tolerate the costs, both human and economic, associated with this war.   
      
   We have been in Iraq for 45 months. Many more Americans have been killed   
   in   
   Iraq than were killed in the first 45 months of our war in Vietnam. I was   
   in   
   the U.S. Air Force in 1965, and I remember well when President Johnson   
   announced a troop surge in Vietnam to hasten victory. That war went on for   
   another decade, and by the time we finally got out 60,000 Americans had   
   died. God knows we should have gotten out ten years earlier. "Troop surge"   
   meant serious escalation.   
      
   The election is over and Americans have spoken. Enough is enough! They   
   want   
   the war ended and our troops brought home. But the opposite likely will   
   occur, with bipartisan support. Up to 50,000 more troops will be sent. The   
   goal no longer is to win, but simply to secure Baghdad! So much has been   
   spent with so little to show for it.   
      
   Who possibly benefits from escalating chaos in Iraq? Neoconservatives   
   unabashedly have written about how chaos presents opportunities for   
   promoting their goals. Certainly Osama bin Laden has benefited from the   
   turmoil in Iraq, as have the Iranian Shiites who now are better positioned   
   to take control of southern Iraq.   
      
   Yes, Saddam Hussein is dead, and only the Sunnis mourn. The Shiites and   
   Kurds celebrate his death, as do the Iranians and especially bin Laden -   
   all   
   enemies of Saddam Hussein. We have performed a tremendous service for both   
   bin Laden and Ahmadinejad, and it will cost us plenty. The violent   
   reaction   
   to our complicity in the execution of Saddam Hussein is yet to come.   
      
   Three thousand American military personnel are dead, more than 22,000 are   
   wounded, and tens of thousands will be psychologically traumatized by   
   their   
   tours of duty in Iraq. Little concern is given to the hundreds of   
   thousands   
   of Iraqi civilians killed in this war. We've spent $400 billion so far,   
   with   
   no end in sight.   
      
   This is money we don't have. It is all borrowed from countries like China,   
   that increasingly succeed in the global economy while we drain wealth from   
   our citizens through heavy taxation and insidious inflation. Our   
   manufacturing base is now nearly extinct.   
      
   Where the additional U.S. troops in Iraq will come from is anybody's   
   guess.   
   But surely they won't be redeployed from Japan, Korea, or Europe. We at   
   least must pretend that our bankrupt empire is intact. But then again, the   
   Soviet empire appeared intact in 1988.   
      
   Some Members of Congress, intent on equitably distributing the suffering   
   among all Americans, want to bring back the draft. Administration   
   officials   
   vehemently deny making any concrete plans for a draft. But why should we   
   believe this? Look what happened when so many believed the reasons given   
   for   
   our preemptive invasion of Iraq.   
      
   Selective Service officials admit running a check of their lists of   
   available young men. If the draft is reinstated, we probably will include   
   young women as well to serve the god of "equality." Conscription is   
   slavery,   
   plain and simple. And it was made illegal under the 13th amendment, which   
   prohibits involuntary servitude. One may well be killed as a military   
   draftee, which makes conscription a very dangerous kind of enslavement.   
      
   Instead of testing the efficacy of the Selective Service System and   
   sending   
   more troops off to a war we're losing, we ought to revive our love of   
   liberty. We should repeal the Selective Service Act. A free society should   
   never depend on compulsory conscription to defend itself.   
      
   We get into trouble by not following the precepts of liberty or obeying   
   the   
   rule of law. Preemptive, undeclared wars fought under false pretenses are   
   a   
   road to disaster. If a full declaration of war by Congress had been   
   demanded   
   as the Constitution requires, this war never would have been fought. If we   
   did not create credit out of thin air as the Constitution prohibits, we   
   never would have convinced taxpayers to support this war directly from   
   their   
   pockets. How long this financial charade can go on is difficult to judge,   
   but when the end comes it will not go unnoticed by any American.   
      
   January 6, 2007   
      
   Dr. Ron Paul is a Republican member of Congress from Texas.   
      
   Quote of the Times;   
   "Anybody who comes into my house to endanger the lives of me or my family   
   is   
   my enemy. I don't care if he wears a turban or the stars and stripes. I   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)