XPost: alt.startrek, alt.tv.star-trek.ds9, alt.tv.star-trek.next-gen   
   XPost: alt.tv.star-trek.tos, alt.tv.star-trek.voyager, alt.startrek   
   XPost: alt.tv.star-trek, alt.tv.star-trek.enterprise   
   From: spam@wonderful.spam   
      
   According to various reports, CBS Paramount Television will offer an   
   enhanced version of "Star Trek: The Original Series" with new   
   state-of-the-art CGI visual effects. Here are some things to look for   
   in these enhanced DVDs.   
      
      
    Improvements to "Star Trek" With Today's Special Effects   
      
      
   10> Sadly, even adding these hyper-cool special effects to such an   
   already brilliant concept still doesn't impress the women like you   
   thought it would when you show it to them in your mom's basement.   
      
    9> Too racy at the time, scandalous Tribble mating scenes now   
   included! In close-up and slo-mo!!   
      
    8> Lieutenant Uhura, Yeoman Rand and Nurse Chapel now all sport   
   spectacular DD cups!   
      
    7> Spock's ears now extra pointy!   
      
    6> "Reversing polarity" now looks like it actually would save the   
   ship.   
      
    5> Digitally edited out all the little "pup tents" Sulu would get   
   whenever one of those beefy Starfleet security fellows strolled by.   
      
    4> Re-shoot the fight sequence from "Amok Time" with fighting moves   
   from "The Matrix."   
      
    3> We can finally use the Orion slave girls as an indication of how   
   chilly it was on the set that day.   
      
    2> Photon torpedoes now 53% more phallic!   
      
    and the Number 1 Improvement to "Star Trek" With Today's Special   
    Effects...   
      
    1> Due to looser television standards, the Vulcan neck pinch is   
   replaced with the originally planned Vulcan nut squeeze.   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)