From: LG-usteen@asdf.fi   
      
   First off, the Orlando Fire Department has described a call-out to   
   Florida's Shooters World gun range, where a teenaged girl had climbed   
   inside a gun safe on the showroom floor and found herself behind its   
   closed and, therefore, locked door.  Fire District Chief J.J. White   
   stated that the crew began by trying the manufacturer's suggestions.   
   When 'the fail-safe system failed on it', they asked the girl to stand   
   back and then used hydraulic extraction tools to bend the safe to   
   their will.   
      
        Shooters World = Worthless door!   
      
      
   Daphne Taylor was sleeping under a dark-coloured blanket on the   
   pavement along a poorly lit Portland, Oregon, street when she was run   
   over by a maintenance vehicle operated by the homelessness-relief   
   charity Central City Concern.  She was left with a broken leg and has   
   filed suit against the charity and the driver, Warren Schaupp, for   
   $450,000.   
     Attorney Greg Kafoury stated that the not-for-profit entity had   
   rejected a settlement that involved providing Taylor with a home.  She   
   is still sleeping on the streets, and the case is still in court.   
      
        Daphne Taylor = Yeah, Portland.   
      
      
   To unwind after a long day at work, North Carolina emergency-room   
   physician Devainder Goli decided to watch a film on his mobile phone.   
   In combination with his car's regrettably named Autopilot feature,   
   this decision caused Goli, 66, to crash into a Nash County patrol car   
   that was responding to an accident on the motorway.  The Tesla's   
   impact sent the police car smashing into a North Carolina State   
   Highway Patrol vehicle, in turn.  Two officers were knocked to the   
   ground but not seriously injured.   
      
   Maybe next time...   
        Devainder Goli = Drive along, die   
      
      
   Sylvia Driskell is a 66-year-old Nebraska woman and self-professed   
   ambassador of 'God, And His, Son Jesus Christ' who has chosen to   
   represent herself in the court case she has filed against all gay   
   people on Earth.  With Driskell v. Homosexuals, she is calling upon   
   U.S. District Judge John M. Gerrard to issue a ruling on whether   
   homosexuality is a sin.  In lieu of case law, she offers quotations   
   from the Bible and a dictionary, along with such arguments as this:   
   '[T]hey the homosexuals know it is a sin to live a life of   
   homosexuality.  Why else would they have been hiding in the closet.'   
      
        Sylvia Driskell = I'll rail vs. dykes   
      
      
   Having judged the novel coronavirus to be a hoax and deeming diagnoses   
   of it to be part of a conspiracy, Florida mother and registered nurse   
   Carole Brunton Davis decided to take her immunocompromised daughter,   
   Carsyn, to a church-sponsored 'COVID party'.  According to the medical   
   examiner's report, the event, attended by 100+ mask-free children,   
   left Carsyn with a telltale cough and headaches.  When she did not   
   improve, Davis initiated home treatment with azithromycin.  That   
   didn't help, so, when Carsyn 'looked gray', Carole attached the   
   teenager to her grandfather's oxygen machine and then tried   
   hydroxychloroquine, before finally taking the 17-year-old to a   
   hospital for intensive care.  Less than two days later, she was dead   
   or, in her mother's words, 'pain free'.   
      
        Carsyn Leigh Davis = Viral chases, dying   
      
        Fort Myers's Carole Brunton Davis =   
        Very dumb loser's a frantic sort, no?   
      
      
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    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)