From: Sokar949@msn.com   
      
   The Church of Zoe has looked into the Communist Party Newspaper, World News   
   Weekly, and have discovered that the CIA/FBI World Communist Party has added   
   three more Commandments to their throne. It must have been written about the   
   time Angela Jolie was hugging and kissing on her brother, or perhaps later   
   when she filed for divorce against her Communist Party husband, Billy Bob.   
   Did you ever wonder why the Communist Party Newspaper can write false   
   stories and chant "Death to Bush" and "Atomic Bomb up your Asshole" and the   
   rest of Americans cannot? Because this is a government newspaper. The   
   government knows that when they can do this type of shit to their moron in   
   the White House, then you will know that "Death to the L.A. Times editor,"   
   is the real meaning that they are trying to sent down the pipeline. The   
   message is clean and simple: SERIAL KILLER NEWSPAPER, SERIAL KILLER CHURCH,   
   SERIAL KILLER GOVERNMENT   
      
      
   THREE MORE COMMANDMENTS FOUND!   
   Pope John Paul calls emergency session of the Vatican Council   
   By AHMET FAROUK   
      
   CAIRO, Egypt -- An archaeological dig at the base of Mount Sinai has yielded   
   the most shocking discovery of the new millennium -- three previously   
   unknown commandments bringing the total number of God's hallowed statutes to   
   13!   
      
   The miraculous find confirms what Biblical scholars and experts have   
   suspected for centuries: There were additional commandments that were lost   
   or discarded during Moses' delivery of God's sacred word.   
      
   "Our team has recovered three long-lost edicts of God," says Dr. Abbasid   
   al-Harfez, Director of Archaeological Studies at the Cairo Institute of   
   Antiquity. "This revelation supports what we have thought all along about   
   additional commandments that may have been lost or forgotten over time."   
      
   The lost commandments were etched onto a single stone, which Dr. al-Harfez   
   speculates was buried by Moses. "It may be the tablets were too heavy for   
   him to carry, or perhaps he disagreed with some of the rules listed on the   
   third stone.   
      
   "Either way, our findings show that the tablet was hastily buried. It was   
   remarkably well preserved for its age."   
      
   Two of the three newfound commandments address some of humanity's oldest   
   issues: Drug abuse and homosexuality. The third new com-mandment is more   
   vague, say several experts.   
      
   "The 11th commandment, 'Thou shalt not partake of the forbidden herbs', and   
   the 12th commandment, 'Thou shalt not covet thine own brother,' attest to   
   the Almighty's genuine concern for the welfare of his greatest creation --   
   the human race," says Dr. al-Harfez.   
      
   "The 13th commandment, 'Thou shalt not take cloth and water to thy person on   
   the seventh day,' is a bit more perplexing, but it is consistent with   
   attitudes about bathing during that time."   
      
   A team of archaeologists and theologians has studied the sacred tablet and   
   concluded that it appears to be authentic. This has led the Vatican to   
   convene an emergency summit with the religious leaders of the Vatican   
   Council to determine what effect this discovery will have on the Catholic   
   faith.   
      
   Thousands of Catholics are flocking to the Vatican for guidance on how this   
   shocking find will affect them. People want to know if they have been   
   sinning.   
      
   "This discovery could have grave consequences for mankind," says a Vatican   
   spokesman. "Just think of all the people who have broken these last three   
   commandments over the millennia, because they did not know they were   
   sinning. Why, I myself took a bath last Sunday."   
      
   Adds another theologian: "It's a shame that these three holy commandments   
   were lost all those years ago. We might have been spared the AIDs epidemic   
   and much of the drug abuse that plagues society today if these sacred laws   
   were included with the original 10."   
      
   Published on: 11/04/2002   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)