XPost: alt.alien.vampire.flonk.flonk.flonk, alt.usenet.kooks, re
.aviation.military
XPost: alt.tv.sopranos, alt.punk
From: godsspeciallamb@gmail.com
Dear, "Walker": Do you like me? Please check a box ( ) YES ( ) NO:
>"Wavy G" wrote in message
>news:g5q1s3dg0fgctgu2ddtjsqgu71kuei356t@4ax.com...
>> Dear, "Walker": Do you like me? Please check a box ( ) YES ( ) NO:
>>
>>>"Wavy G" wrote in message
>>>news:o1fvr3dmuetuon9otlb0osh19hu8gd7gbn@4ax.com...
>>>> Dear, "Tim Weaver": Do you like me? Please check a box ( ) YES ( ) NO:
>>>>>Wavy G wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>> Guess what? (Well, you probably already know from the subject line,
>>>>>> but
>>>>>> anyway...) Last night, I had a dream I met Mr. T! It was great!
>>>>>> Well,
>>>>>> it started out great. Then it kind of downgraded from there. He was
>>>>>> over at my parents' house, (for some reason), and I went over there
>>>>>> and
>>>>>> saw him out in the garage working on his van. I was like, "Hey, Mr.
>>>>>> T!
>>>>>> I was your biggest fan when I was a kid!" And I ran up and gave him a
>>>>>> big hug, and I was like "Do you wanna hang out today?"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He said, "Mr. T loves his fans!" So and but we ended up hanging out
>>>>>> together. What a dream come true for me (well, not really; as it
>>>>>> turns
>>>>>> out, it was actually a dream all along).
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So we were hanging out, Mr. T and me, and I was trying to show him how
>>>>>> much I loved him, so I kept quoting old lines from "The A-Team," so he
>>>>>> would know I was for real. Mr. T was impressed. He was like, "Most
>>>>>> people don't even know those lines!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I said, "Yeah, I bet everybody probably says 'I pity the fool' all the
>>>>>> time, right?"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He was like, "YEAH, everybody says that. I get real tired of that
>>>>>> line!" (Imagine Mr. T yelling everything he says, 'cause that's what
>>>>>> it
>>>>>> was like.)
>>>>>>
>>>>>> And I was like, "Yeah, most people probably wouldn't even know that
>>>>>> line
>>>>>> isn't even from 'The A-Team."
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He said, "Yeah, that was from 'Rocky III'!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I said, "Yeah! 'Rocky III'!" It was great. We were really
>>>>>> connecting,
>>>>>> Mr. T. and me.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Well apparently, the whole time he was hanging out with me, Mr. T must
>>>>>> have thought I was a kid. Because at won point, he found out I was an
>>>>>> adult, and he got kind of peeved at me and said, "I thought you said
>>>>>> you
>>>>>> was a kid!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I was kind of taken aback. I said, "No, I said I was your biggest fan
>>>>>> when I was a kid. I'm not a kid anymore. I'm a 30 year old man."
>>>>>> After
>>>>>> that, his whole attitude towards me changed. He only seemed to like
>>>>>> me
>>>>>> when he thought I was a kid. (Why did he think I was a kid, anyway?)
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I said, "I thought you loved your fans."
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He said, "Mr. T got no time for grown men! Mr. T. loves his little
>>>>>> brothers and sisters, not some 30 year old man!" (Apparently this
>>>>>> took
>>>>>> place a year ago, because I am actually 31.)
>>>>>>
>>>>>> After a while, I think I really started getting on his nerves, 'cause
>>>>>> I
>>>>>> kept on quoting "A-Team" lines, like, "We're takin' the job,
>>>>>> Hannibal!"
>>>>>> and "I ain't gettin' on no plane!" It was really funny (at least, I
>>>>>> thought it was funny), but he started getting really mad at me.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I guess in my dreamlike state, I must've thought that in Mr. T's life,
>>>>>> there must always be that somebody acting "zany" to offset his gruff
>>>>>> demeanor, and to be his comic foil--à la, the "Murdock" to his "B.A."
>>>>>> So
>>>>>> I really thought I was doing the right thing here, people.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Anyway, he was busy trying to work on his van, and I just kept talking
>>>>>> like him, and I could tell his blood pressure was really rising. Then
>>>>>> I
>>>>>> said won of my favourite lines: "You got a choice, Jack. You either
>>>>>> talk...Or you HURT!" and he totally flipped out and started yelling at
>>>>>> me!
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He said, "I'm gettin' tired of you talkin' like me, fool! Cut it out,
>>>>>> or I'll knock you out!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So I said, "No, you cut it out! Or I'll knock YOU out!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> And he was like "QUIT MOCKIN' ME, SUCKA!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So I said, "NO, YOU QUIT MOCKIN' ME, SUCKA!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> And then he said "CUT IT OUT! I'M THE REAL MR. T!"
>>>>>>
>>>>>> So I said, "NO, I'M THE REAL MR. T."
>>>>>>
>>>>>> And then he lost it. He got up and chased after me with his tire
>>>>>> iron,
>>>>>> and that's when I woke up. So anyway, sorry this story had no point.
>>>>>
>>>>>Such a letdown. I was all excited reading this story and ~this~ is how
>>>>>it
>>>>>ends?!? Sheesh...
>>>>
>>>> Sorry, dude. I have no control over my subconscious.
>>>>
>>>
>>>Hi, Wavy. I won't be mad if you dream about me and talk like me in your
>>>dream.
>>
>> Thanks, Henry. You made my fucking day.
>>
>> PS: this was going to be my "running line" with you, but as it turns
>> out, I haven't had another opportunity to use it since its first use,
>> three years ago. So, see you in another three years, I guess.
>>
>
>I'm sorry that nobody has been nice to you in three years. Do you miss my
>little gifts?
How does won do that sarcastic thing where you say "nooooo" but really
mean "yes" on Usenet?
--
"If you don't get slapped, you're not doing it right."
--Tim Weaver gives me the best dating advice I've ever had.
(PS: Apologies to Mimus.)
--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)
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