XPost: alt.out-of-body, alt.consciousness.near-death-exp   
   From: alanb@sonic.net   
      
   in article Xns9551F23A08F0DTest@216.168.3.44, Gremlin at   
   TheGremlin.NoSpam@gmail.com wrote on 8/26/04 8:48 PM:   
      
   > ..:: The Art of Dying ..::   
   >   
   > 2004 by Gremlin   
   > -   
   >   
   > A Dream Within a Dream   
   > (1827)   
   > by Edgar Allan Poe   
   > (1809-1849)   
   >   
   > Take this kiss upon the brow!   
   > And, in parting from you now,   
   > Thus much let me avow-   
   > You are not wrong, who deem   
   > That my days have been a dream;   
   > Yet if hope has flown away   
   > In a night, or in a day,   
   > In a vision, or in none,   
   > Is it therefore the less gone?   
   > All that we see or seem   
   > Is but a dream within a dream.   
   >   
   > I stand amid the roar   
   > Of a surf-tormented shore,   
   > And I hold within my hand   
   > Grains of the golden sand-   
   > How few! yet how they creep   
   > Through my fingers to the deep,   
   > While I weep-while I weep!   
   > O God! can I not grasp   
   > Them with a tighter clasp?   
   > O God! can I not save   
   > One from the pitiless wave?   
   > Is all that we see or seem   
   > But a dream within a dream?   
   > ###   
   >   
   >   
   > Something changes inside a man, when death looks into his soul and he is   
   > forced as well to take a look at himself for the first time.  It is a   
   > reality everyone gets the chance to experience, but not many get to tell   
   > the tale to their children.  I have stepped close to that brink many times.   
   > I had the chance to contemplate death before in the end it came for me.   
   >   
   > I didn't see any white lights, or here any Angels beckoning me.  In reality   
   > I was catatonic in a hospital bed.  Could have been the traumatic life I   
   > had led that got me there, or some chemical that entered my body.  The   
   > doctors haven't told me what led up to my hospital stay and I can't   
   > remember. At the time no one expected me to ever recover... and there is   
   > only so long they will feed you through a tube.   
   >   
   > I was unconscious, and at times I was dreaming dreams.  I remember them   
   > too.  I remember dreaming that I was in school again.  I remember going on   
   > vacation. I even remember the false awakenings.  That is where it all   
   > started.   
   >   
   > The first one wasn't in the hospital bed.  It was in my bedroom where I'm   
   > still living now.  I woke up, or I thought I did, and I walked out to the   
   > bathroom in the dark. When I looked into the moonlit mirror I could see   
   > myself standing there without my shirt on.  My body started changing in the   
   > mirror.  It was growing hair, and fangs.. I was turning into an animal and   
   > it frightened me.  Then I realized that I couldn't be awake and this had to   
   > be a dream I was having.   
   >   
   > In the outside world they knew I was probably never to awaken.  I thought   
   > perhaps that I would wake up soon... Instead though I forgot it was a   
   > dream, and rose into a non dreaming but still unconscious state.   
   >   
   > These false awakenings would happen again, or I would realize I was   
   > dreaming some other way.  When I had these moments of lucidity the reality   
   > began to creep up on me that I couldn't remember when I had last woken up.   
   >   
   > At some point I began wondering, and to some degree believing.. That the   
   > dream world I was living in was the only one there was.  The crucial change   
   > came when I had a false awakening and I turned back over and went back to   
   > sleep, inside of my dream... And that is when it happened.  That is when I   
   > had a dream within a dream.  In that hour, I wasn't really dreaming anymore   
   > than you are dreaming now.  The dream I was having perfectly reflected the   
   > reality I was actually in.  I was in a REM state, and in that state I was   
   > dreaming through the mental process of entering another REM state within   
   > the reality of the dream.   
   >   
   > When I entered that dream.  I was lying in a hospital bed.  Not floating   
   > outside of my body, but unplugging myself from the machines.  I was alone   
   > in the room, but a nurse rushed in and called for the doctor.  She said the   
   > patient was speaking.  When the doctor came into the room he spoke to me,   
   > said my name.  I responded, but he couldn't seem to hear me and they both   
   > left the room.   
   >   
   > This seemed to be a dream to me, and I didn't like it much.  I imagined a   
   > more peaceful place, but it didn't come.  So I walked out of the hospital   
   > and no one seemed to notice me.  I traveled outside, and tried to look at   
   > my watch but it wasn't on my wrist.  It was night out though and there   
   > wasn't much traffic on the street.   
   >   
   > Someone noticed me then, once I was outside the hospital.  He was sitting   
   > in a tree, and I could only make out his silhouette in the darkness and the   
   > moonlight reflecting off his eyes.   
   >   
   > "Not many people come out of there, you know."   
   > I suspected he meant the hospital, but then he spoke again.   
   > "No, not the hospital.  You are still in there, at least in a way."   
   > This was the first dream I had that made any sense.   
   > "I want to go home."   
   > The figure in the tree jumped down from the branches, and I could see him   
   > in the street light.  He was dark skinned and wearing a dark wardrobe, but   
   > barefoot.   
   > "Then go back inside, and lie back down on your bed until someone notices   
   > you."   
   >   
   > I did exactly as the man instructed me to..  After I had rested there for a   
   > few minuets, I began feeling like I was in two places at once.. I started   
   > seeing I had two arms.. Then I started feeling like I was seeing through   
   > two sets of eyes.  I yelled for help.......   
   >   
   > I woke up that night... And life goes on.  The lesson I learned I suppose   
   > can't be taught...  You have to live them for yourself...   
      
      
   you are waking up to your soul .. and the darkside ...   
      
   this is different then the spirit and the lightside ... just the flip of the   
   coin.   
      
   this is why I take the third path between the dualites on the coin - the   
   edge if you will .. the twilight zone where light and dark are always there   
   and in temperate amounts ... the halo - the glory is where I reign.   
      
   anyhow ...   
      
   to get out of this soul stuff you are in - it is all fear based ... lacking   
   knowledge if you will.   
      
   put love into the pain - love in to the fear - love, peace, grace, happy,   
   joy inside of you what you have carrying around.   
      
   it all a projection anyway ...   
      
   with the love inside mixing with your intention you are doomed to manifest t   
   he love ... with fear inside - you are doomed to manifest the fear.   
      
   until you learn about love ...   
      
   and that you are looking at the face of God (I like using the term " the   
   other " ...) 24/7, alive or dead, asleep or awake ... sometimes its blue on   
   black ... tears on the water ... whisper on a scream ... mash on the fire.   
      
   but it is the face of God and it is good all the time - just you putting   
   love into it - or fear is the issue.   
      
   IMO and all that rot ...   
      
   you get what you give ...   
      
   pretty fly for a white guy.   
      
   sumbuddie who cares said dis   
      
   :)   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)