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|    alt.fan.art-bell    |    The adorable whackjob Art Bell    |    96,349 messages    |
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|    Message 95,886 of 96,349    |
|    barfingyak@gmail.com to Colonel Edmund J. Burke    |
|    Re: HOW I SPENT MY SUMMER SOLSTICE ON HE    |
|    27 Jan 19 16:53:22    |
      On Sunday, January 27, 2019 at 11:27:19 AM UTC-6, Colonel Edmund J. Burke       wrote:       > On 1/26/2019 3:34 PM, barfingyak@gmail.com wrote:       > > On Saturday, January 26, 2019 at 12:11:30 PM UTC-6, Colonel Edmund J.       Burke wrote:       > >> On 1/25/2019 2:00 PM, barfingyak@gmail.com wrote:       > >>> On Friday, January 25, 2019 at 10:53:11 AM UTC-6, Colonel Edmund J.       Burke wrote:       > >>>> On 1/24/2019 11:39 AM, barfingyak@gmail.com wrote:       > >>>>> On Thursday, January 24, 2019 at 12:36:11 PM UTC-6, % wrote:       > >>>>>> On 2019-01-24 11:22 a.m., Colonel Edmund J. Burke wrote:       > >>>>>>> HOW I SPENT THE SUMMER SOLSTICE       > >>>>>>> Day two and counting down to Fall. Yesterday was the longest day of       the       > >>>>>>> year--if you live on or about the equator. Everywhere else it's just       a       > >>>>>>> long day. Speaking of long days, I had one of those yesterday. It       > >>>>>>> happened like this...... Pleasance dragged me along to JC       Penny......and       > >>>>>>> well......       > >>>>>>>       > >>>>>>> eventually she wandered off somewhere by her lonesome. Which left me       > >>>>>>> milling around the isles for ten minutes or so--looking for her and       > >>>>>>> beginning to suspect the store dicks thought I was a likely       shoplifter.       > >>>>>>> Then I finally strolled across one. A freakin' chair! If you've ever       > >>>>>>> been, you know there aren't more than two of 'em in any of those       > >>>>>>> freakin' Penny stores. I packed my ass into that chair without delay,       > >>>>>>> settling in for what might be a long wait. It was a nice chair. Metal       > >>>>>>> frame with an upholstered back and contoured seat that felt good       against       > >>>>>>> my cheeks. But enough of that.       > >>>>>>>       > >>>>>>> I glanced around and . . .? Wouldn't you know it, I was plopped down       > >>>>>>> right in the middle of the fucking bras. Which I pretended not to       > >>>>>>> notice, lol. Fucking row after goddamn row of fucking bras! Bras to       hold       > >>>>>>> tits I couldn't fondle and suck in ten thousand years. Well...... I       just       > >>>>>>> sat there twiddling my thumbs, thinking about that, passing time.       > >>>>>>>       > >>>>>>> But soon my mind began to wander, as it often does, towards other       > >>>>>>> important matters; and I found myself called to duty with the sizing       up       > >>>>>>> of women's asses. A good place to do just that. Women everywhere. So       > >>>>>>> then . . . Has it ever crossed your mind . . . about how lots of       women       > >>>>>>> these days have disgusting fat, sloshy asses? Like a twin lumps of       > >>>>>>> melting Jello in a shithouse--it's "Quanto orribile!" I assaulted my       > >>>>>>> sensibilities by picturing, in a military mind, what these young       women       > >>>>>>> with "orribile" asses might look like about a decade or so down the       > >>>>>>> road; and the mental pic reminded me of the old saying, "an ass like       a       > >>>>>>> forty-dollar cow." Surely such lardasses would never grace the pages       of       > >>>>>>> "Cosmo."       > >>>>>>> The nice firm, tight ass--the Holy Grail benchmark for most       men--seemed       > >>>>>>> the exclusive domain of young teen shoppers, who went about their       > >>>>>>> business in the B-cup isle. From eighteen on, girls, it's a downhill       > >>>>>>> toboggan ride for you. I think you know this, too. Of course you do.       It       > >>>>>>> explains why you girls are in such a hurry to get a'hold of a man       while       > >>>>>>> you're still young--while there's still something desirable about       you.       > >>>>>>> Personally, I'm a leg n' ass man, so I appreciate a fine ass, and       I'm a       > >>>>>>> good judge of the same. But enough of that.....       > >>>>>>>       > >>>>>>> At any rate, sitting there on my own ass, it slowly dawned upon me       that       > >>>>>>> my presence there amid the bras was not especially unnoticed. Then       some       > >>>>>>> cow with an ass like a fucking rhinocerous, blockading the entire       isle       > >>>>>>> behind it, despised me a withering glance. “Like I fucking care,       bitch.       > >>>>>>> Cunt! Nobody would fuck you," I thought. I was just about to get the       > >>>>>>> hell outa there and go look for Pleasance again when who but she       > >>>>>>> appeared. When she asked me what I had been doing, I simply said       that I       > >>>>>>> had had enough of asses for one day.       > >>>>>>>       > >>>>>>> Colonel Edmund J. Burke       > >>>>>>> U.S. Army, ret.       > >>>>>>       > >>>>>> too bad the summe soltice hasn't happened yet       > >>>>>       > >>>>> Most tranny asses stay nice and tight. Very few sag like the melting       mozarella cheese-asses of the hags you saw. Some of the tight asses you lusted       after could have been attached to trannies shopping for bras.       > >>>>>       > >>>>       > >>>>       > >>>> You shouldn't call them trannies because that is SO RUDE! Ladyboy is       the better choice.       > >>>       > >>> I prefer Girlyman. Old school.       > >>>       > >>       > >> What you prefer is still rude, sonny.       > >        > > How do you like my dingleberries? Tasty, are they not?       > >        > Dingle Berries are two words, son.              Henceforth ye shalt be named "Teh Pervert Tranny."       He who sits in the bra section to ogle preteen asses.       He/she who likes big-titted men who hide their dicks under skirts!              --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05        * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)    |
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