XPost: alt.fan.howard-stern, alt.fan.tom-servo, alt.tv.real-world   
   XPost: alt.tv.sopranos, alt.usenet.surveys   
   From: henry_walker_212@yahoo.com   
      
   Russell B wrote:   
   > Despite all his or her rage, "Walker"  is   
   > still just a rat in a cage:   
   >   
   >> Russell B wrote:   
   >>> Despite all his or her rage, "John McGuirk"   
   >>>  is still just a rat in a cage:   
   >>>   
   >>>> "Russell B"  wrote in message   
   >>>> news:aage609u9gihf6f9um5omrtjq1aj8fcpav@4ax.com...   
   >>>>> Despite all his or her rage, "John McGuirk"   
   >>>>>  is still just a rat in a   
   >>>>> cage:   
   >>>>>   
   >>>>>> "Russell B"  wrote in message   
   >>>>>> news:c3u9f5$e1t$2@blackhelicopter.databasix.com...   
   >>>>>>> I hope "John McGuirk"  gets   
   >>>>>>> stung by bees.   
   >>>>>>>   
   >>>>>>>> Flush or waste basket?   
   >>>>>>>>   
   >>>>>>>> Discuss.   
   >>>>>>>   
   >>>>>>> Since this is you talking, I'll assume it's a hypothetical   
   >>>>>>> situation, lol. But the answer is as follows:  Your place,   
   >>>>>>> doesn't matter.  Her place, FLUSH.  For the love of God, FLUSH.   
   >>>>>>   
   >>>>>> If it's my place, it doesn't matter? I bet your   
   >>>>>> one of those slobs who uses your toilet like a   
   >>>>>> garbage can. You should NEVER flush anything down   
   >>>>>> the toilet except doodie, peeps and toilet paper.   
   >>>>>> Are you trying to destroy your plumbing? Hmmmm?   
   >>>>>   
   >>>>> No, I'm trying to destroy yours.  Ha ha ha ha.   
   >>>>>   
   >>>>> No, but seriously.  Let me tell you a little story.  Won time, my   
   >>>>> friend was coming over to pick me up so that we could go and see   
   >>>>> some snotty indie-rock band play at a club somewhere.  On the way   
   >>>>> over to pick me up, he noticed that his parents' car, which he was   
   >>>>> borrowing because his was in the shop, needed some oil.  So, when   
   >>>>> he got to my street, he parked his car in the alley and topped up   
   >>>>> his engine with some oil that was in the trunk.  Well, when my   
   >>>>> friend came to the door, he had this worried look on his face, so   
   >>>>> I asked him what was wrong.  And he told me that while topping up   
   >>>>> the oil, he had managed to spill some on the engine.  And in a   
   >>>>> very concerned tone of voice, he asked me: "Will that...hurt the   
   >>>>> engine?"  Naturally, I suppressed my smirk as much as I could   
   >>>>> while informing him that you can't hurt an engine by spilling oil   
   >>>>> on it. Because, you know...it's a FUCKING ENGINE, not a   
   >>>>> seven-layer cake.   
   >>>>>   
   >>>>> Anywho, the reason I am telling you this story (besides the fact   
   >>>>> that, like all my stories, it is fascinating) is because you just   
   >>>>> reminded me of that friend right now, Sharkie.  For real, dude.   
   >>>>> Do   
   >>>>> you believe every old wives tale that you read in Family Circle?   
   >>>>> Fuck.  You couldn't look like more of a little bitch right now if   
   >>>>> you were wearing a pink frilly dress.  With a picture of a guy   
   >>>>> wearing a pink frilly dress on it.  And I say that with all due   
   >>>>> respect.   
   >>>>>   
   >>>>   
   >>>> It is not an old wive's tale. Last year, my   
   >>>> brother had to call a plumber to repair his septic   
   >>>> tank. The plumber pulled out hundreds of used   
   >>>> condoms from out of that thing. Left a huge mess   
   >>>> in his back yard too. Funny thing is....he doesn't   
   >>>> even wear condoms....he had a vasectomy like years   
   >>>> ago. His wife insisted on it.   
   >>>   
   >>> What an odd story.  I mean, is it just me or does something not add   
   >>> up here? Your brother doesn't use condoms...and yet, there are a   
   >>> bunch of condoms in his septic tank.  You know what I mean?  It just   
   >>> seems odd somehow.  Like something isn't right.  Well, thanks for   
   >>> the story, dude.  That'll give me something to ponder tomorrow at   
   >>> work.   
   >>>   
   >>>>>>> (Oh, and if you share a place, just drop them by the side of the   
   >>>>>>> bed. She'll pick them up when she cleans the house tomorrow.   
   >>>>>>> That's her job, remember?)   
   >>>>>>   
   >>>>>> P.S. Have you seen that movie Spellbound? At least   
   >>>>>> 3 of the spelling bee girls look like Pinch.   
   >>>>>   
   >>>>> Yeah, especially the won who talked like a robot and played   
   >>>>> guitar.   
   >>>>> Oh, wait.  That was a guy.   
   >>>>   
   >>>> They live 2 towns away from me. I think i'm going   
   >>>> to go over there and teach them how to be less   
   >>>> jewish.   
   >>>   
   >>> Yeah.  Why don't you get Richard Simmons to teach them how to be   
   >>> less   
   >>> gay while you're at it.  Sheeeeeeeeeesh.   
   >>   
   >> Why don't you ask Flipper Mike to teach you how to be funny?   
   >   
   > Yes, exactly.   
   >   
   > That's a perfect demonstration of my analogy: a person A who displays   
   > trait X in abundance will teach a person B who has significantly less   
   > of trait X how to be Y (where Y is the opposite of X, and person B   
   > already displays trait Y)--the joke, such as it is, residing in the   
   > absurdity of a person who is X being asked to teach those who are   
   > already Y to be Y.  In this case, X = unfunniness and is possessed by   
   > person A (Flipper Mike), and Y = funniness (the opposite of   
   > unfunniness) and is possessed by person B (me).   
   >   
   > Well done, Walker.  Well done.   
      
   Thank you, Russell Bee. :-)   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)