From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   	Sorry I'm late; I was going to post Saturday and then wasn't free   
   to, and Sunday I just forgot.  It's worth mentioning that this episode   
   features one of the more inventive and visually exciting sketches I've   
   seen in a while, the transformation of the show into a comic book, which   
   was really very well done.  I'm curious who did the art for it, and hope   
   whoever had the inspiration for it was justly praised for it.  On with   
   the summary:   
      
   There's always that last woo that trickles out.   
   Max is:   
   	- Not really nice; it's on the cards.   
      
      
   Conologue:   
   	- They don't want to hear a nice story about President Bush.  At   
   a Washington museum and exhibit shows a first-grade report card of Bush;   
   he received straight A's.  Of course, he was 23 at the time.  The 2008   
   presidential campaign is under way: Merle Haggard has written a tribute   
   song to Hillary Clinton.  Bill Clinton has written a tribute song to   
   Hillary Duff.  A geneology company reports Barack Obama's   
   great-great-great-grandfather was born in Ireland, which should sew up   
   both of the Irish black guys raised in Hawaii voters.  John McCain   
   campaigned in Newark, New Jersey, and afterward said ``Oh my God, I   
   thought Vietnam was bad.''  Didn't the Newarkers know something like   
   that was coming?  NBC and Fox will create a new broadcast portal   
   competing with YouTube; it's called ``television''.  A sheriff in   
   Arizona (a woman's either a sheriff, from Arizona, or just woke up and   
   realized where she was) started a version of American Idol for   
   prisoners; it's like the normal version, except when the judge makes a   
   mean comment he gets stabbed in the face.  And sent to Newark.  The   
   Hollywood Chamber of Commerce announced they'll no longer hold the   
   Hollywood Christmas Parade.  Future generations will never experience   
   the Christmas magic of seeing Chuck Woolery wave from a convertible.   
   That one was for him.  Clearly.  A couple in New York City is suing a   
   fertility clinic giving them the wrong sperm, resulting in a child of   
   completely different race.  (They're black; the kid is Max.)  If he came   
   to rehearsal he'd know what was going on.   
      
      
   Late Night's Going To San Francisco:   
   	- He's like a shark with his hair.  ``That shark is wearing   
   mousse!''   
   	   
   	- Visual aids: George W Bush, Dots, NBC in a toilet, Dots,   
   Intercom, Slash, Conan, Slash, Sand, Fran, Cisco.   
      
      
      
   Conan's Little Snow Ritual:   
   	- Throwing a snowball at Brian Williams's office.   
      
      
   Conan's Little Spring Ritual:   
   	- Throwing an egg at Brian Williams's office.   
      
      
   Moving on, we have a great show tonight.   
   Hey, Conan.   
   There's a talk bubble next to your head.   
   Hey, you're right.   
   I've got one too.   
   Do I have one, Conan?   
   Can't you see it, Joel?   
   No, I've gone blind from drinking homemade alcohol.   
   This is so weird.   
   Yeah, it's like we're in a comic book.   
   Yes, comic book!   
   What's The Hulk doing here?   
   Hulk don't know!   
   This doesn't make sense.   
   Conan, you stopped moving.   
   So did you!   
   So did Hulk!   
   Did I stop moving?   
   Shut up, Joel!   
   Conan, you turned into a drawing!   
   So did you!   
   So did Hulk!   
   This is madness!!!   
   Wow, Conan, you're more muscular now!   
   Get used to it, Max!   
   Hulk jealous of Conan's muscles!   
   Hulk smash Conan!   
   Conan smash Hulk!   
   Hulk watch this show for years, thought Conan would fight like girl.   
   I may talk like a girl, Hulk, but don't lose your head over it.   
   Wow, Conan, you punched Hulk's head off!   
   Wow, Conan's so dreamy!   
   Yes, I am, Joel!  We'll be right back after this short commercial break!   
      
   The kid isn't gonna buy that comic book.   
      
      
   Liv Tyler:   
   	- It'll be a weird interview of just looking.  She gets nervous   
   around crowds.  She's a bit of a fainter.  She passed out just before   
   her first scene on a Robert Altman movie.  It feels like her whole body   
   is going to shut down -- Conan feels that a lot -- like you feel hot and   
   flush.  She announces, ``Honey, I'm going to faint now,'' and she does.   
   It's like yelling fore in golf.  She goes home to her family, they fuss   
   about her teeth.  Conan thinks there's nothing dorkier than putting in   
   tooth gear; Conan's dentist says he's grinding his teeth down at night   
   growling that he's going to get that Max and Joel.  The gear is the   
   least sexy thing in the world, although that girl likes it.   
   	   
   	- In Mexico there's this story she didn't believe about guys who   
   stand outside bars and offer car battery electrocutions to sober people.   
    Come to Mexico, you'll have a few drinks and little boys will   
   electrocute you.  She didn't believe this, but they were doing it.  She   
   thinks they think it really works.  Conan's heard of other hangover   
   cures.  ``I've had too much to drink.  I need to stick my finger into   
   that socket.  That'll straighten things out.''   
   	   
   	- There's this square with hundreds of mariachi band players   
   hanging around waiting for you to pick them up.  They're not   
   prostitutes, remember that.   
      
      
   Conan just read this disturbing news story:   
   	- Apparently a guy in Connecticut hid a spy camera in a shampoo   
   bottle and recorded his two female roommates showering; a fourth   
   discovered wires coming out the back of the shampoo bottle.  How can a   
   person do something like that?  Max explains how it's simple, based on a   
   microdot spy camera and so on.  In fact, it couldn't be easier.  Conan   
   meant how could it be done morally?  Max explains how to it with a   
   Morelly Xl-7 spy camera.  If you're serious about it, you can't beat a   
   Morelly and Sons Voyeur Camera.   
      
      
   Gerard Butler:   
   	- Conan doesn't have a six-pack; it's more like a 7-pack,   
   3-3-and-1, with a chiclet.  He started training about four months before   
   the movie started, six hours a day, the trainer was this insane mountain   
   climber.  This gets into body shapes; how does one build up one's rear   
   end?  He promised he wouldn't tell this, but in Point of No Return Joel   
   Schumaker added padding.  For 300, he did about a thousand squats.  Did   
   it change his life?  He can balance drinks on it.   
   	   
   	- He ended up having to shave, even his chest, and his groin.   
   Why shave his groin?  He doesn't know.  He may have been victim of a   
   practical joke.  Shaving a line down his head would have been clearly a   
   joke.  He was at a bar, some women asked him about his 'manscaping',   
   Conan asks who wants topiary forms down there, like a dinosaur, or ...   
   it's crazy.  He keeps his shirt unbuttoned to show it's not shaved   
   anymore.  It's too late now, he already told everyone he has Disneyworld   
   down there.   
   	   
   	- 'Gates of Fire' a year ago described the story; Conan read the   
   book.  It took the Persian army three days to pass one point; they were   
   really lazy, it was just nine guys.   
      
      
   The Fratellis:   
   	- From 'Costello Music': I don't know.   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)