From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   	Not reformatted because I'm sorry, I'm just too overloaded to   
   get to it:   
      
   San Francisco - 2 May 2007 - Robin Williams, The Glide Ensemble   
   Or what is technically a 1600-sqaure-mile estuary consisting of   
   several   
   sub-bays!   
      
   And now the audience is bringing signs!  And foam Mervs!   
      
   String Dance!  Conan lies down to go to sleep.   
      
   Conologue:   
   	- The Orpheum is San Francisco's finest theater in its 25th   
   finest neighborhood.  Foam hair: and they say our country doesn't   
   manufacture anything anymore.  San Francisco has nicknames: The Golden   
   Gate City, the City By the Bay, or Conan's favorite, LA With Books.   
   Orlando Sepeda was arrested for posession of marijuana and what   
   appeared   
   to be cocaine; he insists it was medical marijuana and medical   
   cocaine.   
   The Orpheum was built in 1926; back then, a cup of coffee was a   
   nickel,   
   the cable car a dime, and studio apartment rent only $4,000.  You're   
   not   
   allowed to call someone a bum, unless you're talking about Charles   
   Barkley.  Conan just realized they're Trump wigs.  The annual Oyster   
   and   
   Beer Fest is this month, setting the stage for next month's Raw Egg   
   and   
   Jaeger Fest.  There are 13 candidates for mayor against Mayor Newsom;   
   he   
   said he's looking forward to debating all the candidates and nailing   
   their wives.   
      
      
   Conan's got something he has to do:   
   	- He runs out and turns a cable car around, and starts it   
   going.   
    By hand.   
      
      
   Sponsorship by Intel and Sam Wo's Restaurant.   
      
      
   Conan makes a commercial for Sam Wo:   
   	 -It's all happening at Sam Wo's!  They really got it for you!   
      
   Enter through the kitchen!  It'll have you saying wo!  Pork Intestines   
   just $4.50!  Kids love the Sam Wo Mystery Room!  Remember the Sam Wo   
   Promise, all natural light is blocked by fluorescent lights!  Martha   
   Stewart agrees!   
      
      
   The Transgender Transamaerica Tower:   
   	- Is driving a Trans Am!  License plate HE-SHE.   
      
      
   Conan in Napa Valley:   
   	- It's gorgeous.  Brian is here to talk to us; he was   
   wandering   
   around with a half-empty bottle of sauvignon blanc and two glasses.   
   He's having an intervention.  Brian takes a sip, and spits the rest   
   out,   
   so you can get the flavor without intoxication.  Conan swallows it by   
   accident a couple times, then manages to spit.  Clumsily.   
   	   
   	- Ron is the vineyard manager, one of those guys who tastes   
   soil   
   to see if it's good.  Can he tell when Brian's spit on it?  1974 Swiss   
   Army Troop Transport; six-wheel drive and goes anywhere.  What does   
   the   
   Swiss Army need vehicles for?  They crash the truck.  Maybe he got too   
   excited by the celebrity.  Maybe he needs a drink.  Surely the Swiss   
   can   
   send over a Swiss tractor.  (I couldn't make out what Ron said about   
   keeping his eye and talents when he explained what was wrong.)  They   
   have American tractors.  USA, USA, USA!   
   	   
   	- How do flower clusters turn into grapes?  They're   
   self-pollinating.  Sounds like Conan in college.   
   	   
   	- In the Wine Cave with Jack.  Ron grows the grapes; Jack   
   makes   
   the wine; Brian drinks the wine, in the field, and weeps.  This is a   
   barrel; this is a thing Conan will have to use when he's 80.  Put it   
   in   
   the bung hole, with dirty music.  They'll read the transcript back at   
   the trial.  COnan lifts a sample of wine out.   
   	   
   	- When Jack is at someone else's and invited to wine ... he's   
   controlling.  This is why he's not invited much, and why he lives in a   
   cave.  This barrel needs more wine.  The acoustics are fantastic;   
   Conan   
   plays guitar.  Brian, Ron, and Jack drink.   
   	   
   	- The Tasting Room: Conan dresses as Hef.  Sauvignon blanc: a   
   lovely, crisp wine from France.  Let's taste.  Conan brought his own   
   tasting glass; it's the size of Steve Martin.  COnan gets a   
   double-glass   
   'beer hat' for the red.  Conan goes in the field with a ton of red,   
   and   
   spits it around.  Eventually, he runs out, and passes out in the   
   meadow.   
      
      
      
      
   Late NIght San Francisco Small Talk Moment:   
   	- Max's take on the plastic shopping bag ban?  He has a   
   metaphor   
   in asking the goth kid at the specific record store for Nicklebag   
   albums.  Conan wants to buy everyone a tacquerito.   
      
      
   Robin Williams:   
   	- Williams climbs the Golden Gate model; the audience urges   
   him   
   to jump.  He does not.  It's handy for people considering suicide.   
   Wiliams suggests China will buy it.  Or they could use it to repair   
   Oakland.  Market Street is like 42nd Street without Disney.  Sticky   
   seats.  He starts doing accents, then advises the existence of   
   Boystown   
   and a bar, Moby Dick, take your chance.  Knob Hill, and then Sam Wo's,   
   giving Williams a fresh excuse to do his 'Chinese' voice, and then on   
   to   
   insulting Martha Stewart.  Williams points out the Irish bars.  He   
   claims Irish songs always start depressing and turn chipper.   
   	   
   	- Williams is fascinated with the show 'The Planet Earth', and   
   goes onto mating dances.  This goes to preying mantises and turtles as   
   pets.  Before long, Williams is howling in the mode he always gets   
   into.   
    'License to Wed': a priest harasses a copule before they wed.  He   
   compares Catholic priesthood to being trapped in a box and forced to   
   listen to secrets you wouldn't read in Penthouse.  He's a zany priest   
   who brings the a Roy Combs touch to the Baltimore Catechism.   
      
      
   Pierre Bernard!   
   	- He's been trekking up and down the hills.  It's starting to   
   show: he has Popeye legs.  Welcome Pierre and his Overdeveloped Hills   
   of   
   San Francisco calves!   
      
      
   The Glide Ensemble:   
   	- Couldn't tell what they were singing.  I had to keep turning   
   the volume down lest it wake Dad.   
      
   Conan starts signing signs: ``I Love Conan'' and ``I Like Conan (As A   
   Friend)''.  Good in modest bits bit do be careful.  This way lies Jay   
   Leno ...   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)