From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   Max Is:   
   	- Offering the nightly awkward exchange.   
      
      
   Conologue:   
   	- Britney Spears was involved in a fender-bender, but her kids weren't in the   
   car at the time.  They were strapped to the roof.   
   	   
   	- At a Utah campaign event hundreds showed up to hear Barack Obama.  The   
   crowd thought it was great and wants to hear if an Asian guy ever comes to   
   town.   
   	   
   	- Van Halen is reuniting for the first tour with David Lee Roth in twenty   
   years.  They would've reunited sooner, but until now, they weren't desperate   
   enough.   
      
   	- Hooters announced they may open in Dubai.  They'll open next to the Dubai   
   ``Thank God It's Fatwahs''.   
   	   
   	- Entertainment Tonight reports Denise Richards asked Charlie Sheen to donate   
   sperm.  He'd be happy to donate, but he had a big weekend and is totally out.   
   	   
   	- A Delta flight attendant was removed from the plane as she was allegedly   
   drunk.  She ended the seat belt demonstration with, ``Got that, krunk-holes?''   
      
      
   Marketing Study:   
   	- Kids think the same food tastes better when in McDonald's packaging,   
   according to a study.  Joel says it's not just kids.  He also thinks   
   everything tastes better in a wrapper, and he has his oiled Asian guy in a fry   
   box.  It's super-sized and ``I'm    
   lovin' it!''  The Asian guy looks terribly unhappy.  Or sexy.  Joel is way   
   into his part, and wins.   
      
      
   In The Year 2000 - Drew Carey Edition   
   	- Lindsay Lohan will reenter a rehab center when the SUV she's driving   
   crashes through its window.   
   	   
   	- There will be no doubt Barry Bonds took steroids when doctors find two tiny   
   asterisks where his testicles used to be.   
   	   
   	- America will put a man on Mars, Russia will perfect cold fusion, and China   
   will create toothpaste that doesn't kill anyone.   
   	   
   	- Excited British scholars will find a lost Shakespeare play, but will doubt   
   its authenticity when they find the main characters are named Rerun and Rog.   
   	   
   	- Rapper 50 Cent will lose street credibility when he stops rapping about   
   being shot and starts rapping about the poor selection of scented soaps at   
   Crabree and Evelyn.   
   	   
   	- The Art World will be shocked when it's learned the original title of   
   Whistler's Mother was actually Whistler's Milf.   
   	   
   	- Millions of people will tune into the A&E reality show The Two Coreys only   
   to be disappointed it stars Corey Haim and Corey Feldman, not the other two   
   Coreys.  Which other two Coryes?  Any other two Coreys.   
   	   
   	- Astronomers will discover a planet exactly like Earth in every way except   
   that their Star Jones is still fat.   
   	   
   	- Drew Carey will prove to be The Price Is Right's most controversial host   
   ever when he ends every show not by asking viewers to neuter their pets, but   
   by asking for the age of consent to be lowered to 13.   
   	   
   	- That's nothing!  America will know I'm not their daddy's Price Is Right   
   host when I launch my new game, Two in The Plinko, One In The Stinko.   
   	   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)