From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
           Suppose we've missed a few episodes here and there but, still, here's   
   at least a little catching-up on the abstracts.   
      
   Conan Abstract Project Episode 1510 - 24 June 2021   
      
   Cold Open: Homer Simpson does exit interview with Conan O'Brien.   
           - Homer's there for a big star at TBS; figures it's one of the   
   Impractical Jokers.  'That time you and Sal blew up that toilet, I can't   
   believe that guy lived!'   
           - Homer's had hundreds of jobs, at one point even a monorail   
   conductor, 'What a stupid idea that was!'  Conan thinks that's a nifty idea.   
           - 'How long have you been working at Tibs?'  'I think you mean TBS.'    
   'Thanks a lot, smart guy, but I think I know how to spell Tibs.'   
           - Homer's favorite moment was that time Conan asked an actor if there   
   were any wacky stuff on the set of his movie and told a mildly interesting   
   anecdote and Andy fell asleep.  'You just described pretty much all the shows   
   I've ever done.'  'Good    
   thing I only saw one, then.'   
           - How would his coworkers describe him?  In one word or less.    
   'Irish.'  'Funny, you don't look Irish.'   
           - 'You know what?  I'm gonna get a pencil and write this down.'   
           - Conan reveals his Homer-level baldness.  'Oh my god!  You're   
   beautiful!  You mean the world to me, Conrad!'   
      
      
   Opening Credits.   
           - With Jimmy Vivino and the Basic Cable Four   
      
      
   Monologue.   
           - Closing jump obscured by audience sign.  No string dance!  Conan   
   chant tamped down, 'It's getting creepy ... I know how Mussolini felt.'  Andy:   
   'I don't think you should say that.'  'I thought it all turned out well for   
   ol' Mussolini, didn't it?   
   '   
           - 'Our final show on TBS.'  Andy: 'Wait, *what*?  I just bought an   
   amphibious car!'   
           - They've done over 4000 hours of TV.  Always promised tonight was   
   really great, was often lying.   
           - Thanks everyone at the Simpsons for the cold open, promotes this   
   little show that's never broken through.   
      
      
   Live Over Zoom: Will Ferrel.   
           - He's in Boston, shooting a secret project.  It's Batman.  'In this   
   version he gives oral'.   
           - Wishing all the best, excited to see what comes next.  Was there for   
   the last Late Night, and the last Tonight Show, and now this.  It's krunking   
   *exhausting*.   
           - Pretapes a few goodbyes for when his next several shows flame out.   
           - Slates, introducing 'string of Conan talk show goodbyes', claps   
   hands together.   
           - Congratulations on HBOmax show, six episodes isn't a lot but you   
   packed enough for eight episodes.   
           - Will from set of his Batman sequel, we all miss his late night   
   talk-show on Al-Jazeera Network.  Sorry about the fatwa.   
           - When I heard MTV3 was looking for host of new reality show, 'Videos   
   of People Dry-Humping in Trucks' you were the first name that popped into my   
   head and now, 12 seasons later ... good luck, next host Logan Paul Jr.   
           - I wish we were done!  Truly going to miss your Delta Airlines talk   
   show 'Wheels up!'   
           - YouTube won't be the same without your classic unboxing videos, such   
   reverence and wit to episodes such as Kitchen-Aid Serrated Bread Knife.   
           - Reality Competition Show 'Celebrity Room-Temperature Oyster Eating   
   Contest' cut down by explosive diarrhea outbreak; who could have predicted?    
   Everyone.   
           - Conan is 80% sure we have a great show tonight.   
      
      
   [ Commercial Break ]   
      
      
   First Section.   
           - So many amazing guests.  Here's a sample.   
           - Steve Martin reading his diary of Conan's sluggishness.   
           - Martin Short, would love to do the shore more often but, you know,   
   pride   
           - Jordan Schlansky brings Lego Millennium Falcon to Harrison Ford, who   
   trashes it   
           - The Notebook 2 'clip'.  Conan wrote Ryan Reynolds every day for a   
   year; they kiss   
           - Tequila Slaps with not sure   
           - Betty White is 'getting better' seeing muscle-y guy on magazine   
           - Lord of the Rings guy showing off a prop ring; 'My Precious' guy   
   comes in and swipes it.   
           - Will Ferrell shows off his dog-training, with maze of dog stunts to   
   perform.  Absolutely none of the dogs do anything and it's all about the dogs   
   going out of control while he freaks out.   
           - Medley of Zach Galifianakis entrances.   
           - Woman doing impression of turtle, eats lettuce.   
           - Woman talking about being single; it gets dirty, shocking Conan.    
   'Why does every question I ask you go down a certain [path]?'   
           - Blue-screen riding stunt with Tom Hanks and Woody on a motorcycle;   
   Woody gets knocked off by road sign   
           - Andy Samberg 'and his new baby girl'; doll is riding on a chest   
   charrier; does a lot of chest-bumping, jumps on the ground and all.   
           - That cell phone crotch trick I don't want my Dad to know about   
           - Animal expert on; a large (iguana?) wraps their tail around Conan's   
   leg so the tail pokes out between his legs.  Andy: 'Now they all know the   
   Conan that we know.'   
           - Comic be-bop singing duet with actor I didn't recognize.   
      
      
   [ Commercial Break ]   
      
      
   Second Section.   
           - Conan trying his hand at other careers, 'I hit it out of the park   
   every time.'   
   	- Mary Kay Beauty Consultant.  Goes outside to stare in from the window with   
   mis-painted lips.   
           - Commercial Actor.  Scenario of being too calm while driving in   
   crises.  'Wait, you're saying I hit a guy on a bike, but because I'm in such a   
   nice car, I don't give a krunk?  That's crazy, this car is making me   
   immoral!'  Lighting makes Conan    
   look eight years old.   
           - Modern Dancer.  Alvin Alley dance troupe.  Conan gets his head   
   edited on top of a better dancer's body.  Conan starts drumming, picks people   
   who are still dancing when he stops and picks them out.  '*You* are now Uber   
   drivers.'   
      
      
   [ Commercial Break ]   
      
      
   Third Section.   
           - Conan Without Borders clips.   
   	- Cuba.  Dancing; Cuban pay phones.  Supermarket with rows of one product.    
   Manager doesn't want them filming there.  Sings 'I am Nutella', other   
   gibberish with street band.   
           - Korea.  Learning the language.  Creeps out language instructor.  'I   
   don't like you.'  Visiting Demilitarized Zone.  K-Pop video.   
           - Armenia.  Sheepherders dressed like bouncers.  Conan and Sona   
   Movsesian dress in more traditional garb.  Her voice drives sheep along.   
           - Haiti.  Conan desk-drumming in a schoolroom; kids join in.  One kid   
   slaps his hand.   
           - Israel.  David invites Conan for coffee, thinks he's beautiful.   
           - Australia.  Male echidnas have four-pronged penises.  'Why?'  'Why   
   not?' 'She's good.'   
           - Mexico.  Conan giving monologue in Spanish.  Collects for the wall;   
   people give the finger.   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)