XPost: rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc, alt.tv.mst3k   
   From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   >     XI   
      
    CROW: The toll for being in this chapter is the excise tax.   
     MIKE: D... do ...   
      
   >   
      
     TOM: Don't encourage him, Mike.   
      MIKE; Do I *know* you, Crow?   
      
      
   >  JASPER JAY TELLS SOME NEWS   
      
     TOM: Then the five-day weather and then Mister Food's Test Kitchen.   
      
   >   
   >	It was quite late in the fall,   
      
    CROW: Not so late as to have hit bottom.   
      
      
   >                                      and the weather had grown very   
   > cold. Mrs. Raccoon and her family had not left their home for several   
   > days;   
      
    MIKE: Join the club.   
      
   >       but on this day she thought it would be pleasant to go out in   
   > the sunshine and get a breath of fresh air and a bite to eat.   
      
     TOM: Maybe run down to the comics shop, see if her pulls are in.   
      
   >   
   >	Fatty was the only one of her children that was not asleep;   
      
    CROW: If these are 'Sleepy-Time Tales' why aren't we following the sleeping   
   kids?   
      
   > and he complained of being very hungry. So Mrs. Raccoon decided to take   
   > him with her.   
      
    MIKE: So hard finding a babysitter this time of year.   
      
   >   
   >	The hunting was not very good. There were no birds' eggs at   
   > all to be found in the trees.   
      
     TOM: [ As Fatty ] ``*Technically* eggs would be found in the *nests* in the   
   trees.''   
      MIKE: Great, he's becoming a ``well, actually'' raccoon.   
      
   >                               The river and the brook and the creek   
   > were all frozen over, so Fatty and his mother could not catch any   
   > fish.   
      
    CROW: Fish gathering underneath, sticking their tongues out at the raccoons.   
      
   >       And as for corn   
      
    MIKE: It's that ``excise'' joke Crow brought.   
    CROW: Hey!   
      
   >                      ---Farmer Green had long ago gathered the last   
   > ear of it. Fatty wished that it was summertime.   
      
    CROW: o/` Summertime's nice with a place to go, bedtime, overtime, halftime   
   too ... o/`   
      
   >                                                 But it only made him   
   > hungrier than ever,   
      
     TOM: How?   
      
   >                     to think of all the good things to eat that summer   
   > brings. He was feeling very unhappy when his mother said to him   
   > sharplby   
      
    MIKE: [ As Fatty ]  ``Cheddar!  I mean, what?''   
      
   >   
   >	"Run up this tree! Hurry, now! Don't ask any questions."   
      
    CROW: [ As Mrs Raccoon ]  ``Wait, first put on these clown shoes and don't   
   let this businessman's valise out of your grip!  But no questions!''   
     TOM; [ As Fatty ] ``Whuh --- huh --- ''   
    CROW: [ As Mrs Raccoon ]  ``And only answer people who speak to you in   
   Ubby-Dubby!''   
     TOM: Pig Raccoon ...   
      
   >   
   >	Now, Fatty did not always mind his mother as quickly as he   
   > might have.   
      
    MIKE: Why, I've never minded Mrs Raccoon at all.  She's always been a   
   wonderful companion and magnificent storyteller.   
    CROW: A real raccoonteur?   
    MIKE: Yeah, I was leaving that for people to work out on their own.   
      
   >             But this time he saw that she had stopped and was sniffing   
   > the air as if there was something about it she did not like.   
   >   
   >	That was enough for Fatty. He scrambled up the nearest tree.   
      
     TOM: That's a shrub!   
     CROW: Thud!  ... OK, well, the second-nearest tree then!   
      
   > For he knew that his mother had discovered danger of some sort.   
      
    MIKE: Too late Mrs Raccoon realized the danger was raccoon-eating trees!   
      
   >   
   >	Mrs. Raccoon followed close behind Fatty. And they had no sooner   
   > hidden in the branches than Fatty saw what it was that his mother had   
   > smelled.   
      
    CROW: Tim Horton's doughnuts?   
      
   >   
   >	It was Johnnie Green!   
      
     TOM: Tell us what they've won, Johnnie Green!   
      
   >                             He passed right underneath the tree   
   > where they were perched. And as Mrs. Raccoon peeped down at him she   
      
    MIKE: 'Peeped'?   
     TOM: [ As Mrs Raccoon ] 'If I hear one more peep out of me I'm turning   
   myself around and going home!'   
      
      
   > shuddered and shivered and shook so hard that Fatty couldn't help   
   > noticing it.   
      
    MIKE: Mrs Raccoon's powering up!   
      
   >   
   >	"What's the matter?" he asked, as soon as Johnnie Green was   
   > out of sight.   
      
    CROW: Oh, Johnnie's an ex.  Messy breakup.   
      
   >   
   >	"His cap!" Mrs. Raccoon exclaimed.   
      
    CROW: That propeller can't be fast enough to lift off!   
      
   >                                          "He is wearing a raccoon-skin   
   > cap!" Now do you wonder that she was upset?   
      
     TOM: Oh.   
    MIKE: Yeah, Mom's being fair there.   
      
      
   >                                             "Don't ever go near Farmer   
   > Green's house," she warned Fatty. "You don't want to be made into a   
   > cap, or a pair of gloves, or a coat, or anything like that, do you?"   
      
    CROW: No, I want it to be by my free choice!   
      
   >   
   >	"No, indeed, Mother!" Fatty was quite sure that such an   
   > adventure wouldn't please him at all.   
      
     TOM: Now, being turned into a beer can cozy?  Don't knock *that* until   
   you've tried it.   
      
   >                                       And he told himself right then   
   > and there that he would never go anywhere near Farmer Green's house.   
      
    MIKE: [ As Mrs Raccoon ] 'Now let's explore this tree you found for us!'   
     TOM: [ As Fatty ] 'It's, uh, Farmer Green's chimney ... ... ... Sorry?'   
      
      
   > We shall see how well Fatty remembered.   
      
    CROW: Hey, foreshadowing!   
      
   >   
   >	That very afternoon Fatty Raccoon heard some very pleasant news.   
   > It was Jasper Jay who told him.   
      
     TOM: Oh yeah!  The *chapter*!   
      
   >   
   >	Jasper Jay was a very noisy blue jay who lived in the   
   > neighborhood.   
      
    CROW: [ As Jasper ]  'You know unlike other blue things I just *look* blue!'   
     TOM: [ As Fatty ] 'Yes, all things that look blue look blue, that's how   
   looking blue *works*.'   
      
   >               He did not go south with most of the other birds when   
   > the cold weather came.   
      
    MIKE: He migrated east.  It started one year as a mistake he was too stubborn   
   to admit.   
      
   >                        He liked the winter and he was forever tearing   
   > about the woods, squalling and scolding at everybody. He was a very   
   > noisy fellow.   
      
     TOM: Man, Arthur Scott Bailey really makes nature sound like it's full of   
   jerks.   
      
   >   
   >	Well! when Fatty and his mother had reached home after their   
   > hunt, Fatty stayed out of doors.   
      
    MIKE: What did they hunt?   
     TOM: Oh, they went to the thrift scores.  Scored this ceramic coaster with   
   the Harvey Wallbanger cartoon guy on it.   
      
      
   >                                  He climbed to the top of a tall pine   
   > tree nearby and stretched himself along a limb, to enjoy the sunshine,   
   > which felt very good upon his broad back.   
      
     TOM: Boy, remember being young enough you could just spend the evening   
   flopped out on a pine tree?   
      
   >                                           It was there that Jasper Jay   
   > found him and told him the pleasant news.   
      
    CROW: ``Jules Rivera's doing an AMA?  We can ask her why she hates Mark Trail   
   and waits it destroyed?  Let's go!''   
      
   >                                           And Fatty was very glad to   
   > hear the news, because he was still hungry.   
   >   
   >	This is what Jasper Jay told Fatty: he told him that Farmer   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)