XPost: rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc, alt.tv.mst3k   
   From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   >   
   >   
   >       XII   
      
     TOM: Chapter Two, Part Ten.  The Prequel.   
      
   >   
   >       WINNING BY A TRICK   
      
    CROW: And the weasel in my hand is the four of diamonds, is it not?   
      
   >   
   >       Grumpy Weasel wouldn't stop long with his cousin,   
   > Peter Mink,   
      
    JOEL: No?  I thought they were both pretty long?   
      
   >             and old Mr. Crow and all the rest.   
      
     TOM: o/` Here on Gilligan's Rabbit! o/`   
      
   >   
   >       He was in a hurry to overtake Jimmy Rabbit.   
      
    CROW: In hour 182 of the race.   
      
   >                                                   And after   
   > quarreling fiercely with the whole company---   
      
     TOM: The acting company, over who's getting the lead in You're A Good Mink,   
   Charlie Brown.   
      
   >                                              except his   
   > cousin---he sprang up with a wicked glitter in his black eyes   
      
    JOEL: Oh, he's never going to get that glitter out of his eyes now.   
      
   > and left without another word.   
      
    CROW: What are we going to do with this pile of words he left us?   
     TOM: Say them?   
      
   >   
   >       "That fixed him," said Mr. Crow knowingly.   
      
    JOEL: CRASH!   
     CROW: Ah, he's broke again!   
      
   >   
   >       "What did?" Peter Mink demanded.   
   >   
   >       "That rest!" Mr. Crow replied.   
      
     TOM: Six quarter notes of silence going into the bridge?  Brilliant   
   suspension!  It'll be the hit of Tin Pan Alley once they invent Tin Pan Alley!   
      
   >                                      "It gave Jimmy Rabbit   
   > just time enough to go where he's going."   
      
    CROW: Well, when he gets there tell him to come back and explain it to us.   
      
   >                                           And that was all he   
   > would say.   
      
    JOEL: What, *now* Mr Crow figures silence is a virtue?   
      
   >   
   >       Not until Grumpy Weasel returned some time later did   
   > any one know what Mr. Crow meant.   
      
     TOM: Oh, Jimmy found the Save Spot.   
      
   >   
   >       Grumpy Weasel was in a terrible temper when he came   
   > slowly back.   
      
    CROW: So ... did he win?  Lose?  Tie?   
      
   >              Everybody could tell, without asking, that the   
   > race was ended.   
      
    JOEL: Well, Jimmy didn't eat Grumpy, we can rule *that* out.   
      
   >   
   >       "Where did you catch him?" Peter Mink asked his   
   > cousin.   
      
     TOM: Ah, he grabbed a bus, the coward.   
      
   >   
   >       Grumpy Weasel said in a few ill-chosen words   
      
    JOEL: [ As Grumpy ] 'Florid apostasy walks through clutch Melpomene!  That's   
   a *terrible* collection of words!'   
      
   >                                                    that he   
   > hadn't caught Jimmy Rabbit at all,   
      
    CROW: Maybe you could return the unused portion for a full refund?   
      
   >                                    and that somebody had   
   > played a trick on him.   
      
     TOM: A trick?  From a rabbit?  There's nothing in folklore to justify *that*!   
      
   >                        He looked directly at Mr. Crow as he   
   > spoke.   
      
    CROW: [ Leaning forward, as though kissing Grumpy. ]  Mmmmmwah!   
      
   >   
   >       "It wasn't Johnny Green, was it?"   
      
    JOEL: It was his cousin from Rome, Giuseppi Verdi.   
      
   >                                         Mr. Crow inquired   
   > solemnly as he moved carefully to a higher limb.   
      
     TOM: It's Johnny Green's shoulder!  Get out of there!   
      
   >   
   >       Grumpy Weasel could tell, then, without a doubt,   
      
    JOEL: Oh, take a doubt, we have so *many* this time of year.   
      
   >                                                        that   
   > it was Mr. Crow that had made him lose the race.   
      
     TOM: But he won the moral victory!   
      
   >                                                  Grumpy had   
   > followed hot on Jimmy Rabbit's tracks.   
      
    CROW: Hot!  (Sssssssss)  Weasel!   
      
   >                                        And to his surprise   
   > they led straight toward the farm buildings.   
      
    JOEL: They keep on building the farm but it's never *built*.   
      
   >                                              But Grumpy kept   
   > on and never stopped until he reached the farmyard fence   
      
     TOM: [ As a Fence ] 'Wanna buy a hot weasel?'   
      
   > where he crouched and watched Jimmy disappear---of all   
   > places!   
      
    JOEL: Right into a top hat!   
     TOM: [ As a scolding sort of cry ] Liddsville!   
      
      
      
   >        ---right in the woodshed, where Johnny Green was   
   > picking up an armful of wood.   
      
    CROW: Fatty Raccoon, now Jimmy Rabbit, you figure Johnny Green's tired of   
   being roped into all these animal dramas any?   
      
   >   
   >       Of course Grumpy Weasel wouldn't think of entering   
   > such a dangerous place.   
      
     TOM: Oh, c'mon, wood is just as afraid of you as you are of it!   
      
   >                         And when he heard a shout and saw   
   > Johnny Green come out with Jimmy Rabbit in his arms   
      
     TOM: Smooching.   
      
   >                                                     he knew   
   > that Jimmy Rabbit had won the race, even if he had lost his   
   > freedom.   
      
    CROW: EPI!  NOOOOOOOOOOOO!   
    JOEL: [ Pats CROW's shoulder. ]   
      
      
      
   >   
   >       "It was that old black rascal, Mr. Crow,   
      
    CROW: That's just how I look in silhouette.   
      
   >                                                that put   
   > that notion into Jimmy Rabbit's head," Grumpy said savagely   
      
    JOEL: Now wait, how do you know it's not Jimmy's 'Brother'?   
      TOM: Yes, his ... 'Brother'.   
      
   > to himself as he turned and made for the woods. "They were   
   > talking together a little while ago."   
      
    CROW: Well, did I give *you* any good ideas?   
      
   >   
   >       And all the way back to the stone wall he kept   
   > thinking what he would do to Mr. Crow if he could ever get   
   > hold of him.   
      
     TOM: Challenging him to a race is out ... what if you made Mr Crow race   
   Jimmy Rabbit?   
      
   >              So you can see that he must have looked very   
   > dangerous when he reached his hunting ground;   
      
    JOEL: You go and look, I'm a-scared to.   
      
   >                                               and you can   
   > understand why Mr. Crow took pains to change his seat.   
      
    CROW: [ Getting up, bumping into JOEL but not going farther ] 'Scuse me,   
   pardon me, coming through, one way, scuse me, pardon me ... '   
      
   >   
   >       "I may have lost the race---through a trick," Grumpy   
   > hissed as he glared at Mr. Crow.   
      
     TOM: [ As Dan Backslide ] A runabout?  I'll steal it!  No one will ever know!   
      
   >                                  "But one thing is certain:   
      
    JOEL: You don't tug on Superman's cape.   
      
   > That young Jimmy Rabbit will trouble us no more. He's Johnny   
   > Green's prisoner."   
      
    CROW: And Johnny Green wants ... information!   
      
   >   
   >       "Nonsense!" cried Mr. Crow. "He'll escape some fine   
   > day."   
      
     TOM: [ As Grumpy ] 'It's supposed to rain all next week!'   
      
   >   
   >       "Nonsense! He won't!" Grumpy Weasel disputed.   
      
    CROW: 'Disputed'.   
      
   >                                                     And he   
   > never begged Mr. Crow's pardon.   
      
     TOM: That makes two of us.   
    CROW: Hey!   
      
   >                                 And neither did Peter Mink   
   > apologize to the old gentleman, as Mr. Crow had said he   
   > would.   
      
    JOEL: Mr Crow's a gentleman?   
    CROW: We are all fine creatures!   
      
   >        So in one way Mr. Crow was wrong. But in another way   
   > he was right.   
      
     TOM: And in being right, isn't that the real wrong?   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
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