XPost: rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc, alt.tv.mst3k   
   From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   >   
   >   
   >       XVII   
      
     TOM: Editing rival to emacs-XTREME.   
      
   >   
   >       GRUMPY'S MISTAKE   
      
    CROW: He just assumed Dewey was going to defeat Truman and now ...   
      
   >   
   >       As soon as Grumpy Weasel left to chase the squirrels   
      
    JOEL: If you know what I mean.   
      
   > and mice that he had frightened away from the corncrib   
      
     TOM: Everybody run!  The corn is teething!   
      
   >                                                        Fatty   
   > Raccoon hurried into the building through a hole in the floor   
      
    CROW: I'm fixing a hole where the racc climbs in ...   
      
   > which nobody knew but himself.   
      
    JOEL: The loneliness of the long-distance raccoon.   
      
   >   
   >       Though he was a great eater   
      
     TOM: I don't know about 'great', I mean, he eats a lot but does he do   
   anything to advance the eating *arts*?   
      
   >                                   Fatty was also a fast   
   > one. And now he bolted a huge meal of corn   
      
    CROW: A cornmeal?   
    JOEL: No, a meal of corn.   
    CROW: Right, so, a cornmeal.   
    JOEL: No, you're not hearing me.   
    CROW: I need better ears.   
    JOEL: Ears of corn.   
    CROW: Cornears.   
     TOM: Corneas?  I thought his eyes were fine?   
      
   >                                            in only a few   
   > minutes. Then, smiling broadly, he left the corncrib by his   
   > private doorway   
      
    JOEL: Polite way of saying he fell through the floor.   
      
   >                 and squatted down to await Grumpy's return.   
      
     TOM: Now there's a sentence nobody's ever written before.   
      
   >   
   >       In a little while Grumpy appeared.   
      
    CROW: As the prophecy foretold.   
      
   >   
   >       "I hoped I'd see you again," Fatty Raccoon told him.   
      
    JOEL: Well now Grumpy just knows you're lying.   
      
   > "Did you have any luck?"   
      
     TOM: He hasn't had any luck this whole book!   
      
   >   
   >       "No!" Grumpy Weasel snapped. "I was mistaken about   
   > your idea.   
      
    CROW: It fails to account for how the cosmological constant would have to   
   vary in the first ten-billionths of a second after the Big Bang!   
      
   >            It was a very poor one. For I've been running in a   
   > circle (as you suggested) till I'm dizzy;   
      
    JOEL: Well, just run in circles the opposite way until you're un-dizzy.   
      
   >                                           and I haven't seen   
   > the least sign of a mouse nor a squirrel."   
      
     TOM: [ As Boris Badenov ] 'Have to get mouse and squirrel!'   
      
   >   
   >       Fatty Raccoon told him to cheer up.   
      
    CROW: You can just *feel* Grumpy's withering stare through the pages like   
   this.   
      
   >   
   >       "I've another idea for you," he said.   
      
    JOEL: No time to ask questions, just put on this clown suit and this tiny   
   doghouse over your head!   
     TOM: 'I've'?   
      
   >   
   >       "Keep it! Keep it!" Grumpy Weasel hissed.   
      
     TOM: No, take the box!   
    CROW: Door number three!  You always want door number three!   
      
   >                                                 "Your last   
   > idea only made me tired; and I haven't a capture to my credit   
   > to-night."   
      
    JOEL: 'I haven't a capture to my credit to-night'?  Why is he talking like   
   he's in a lesser PG Wodehouse?   
     TOM: Grump Among The Chickens.   
      
   >   
   >       "That's because you ran too fast," Fatty explained   
   > glibly.   
      
    CROW: He ... ran right past the squirrels?   
      
   >         "Now, if you'll be careful to run slowly, and do just   
   > as I tell you, I can promise that there'll be a capture,   
   > without fail."   
      
     TOM: Now, if you invade Persia, a great empire will be destroyed.   
      
   >   
   >       Grumpy had had such bad luck in his hunting about the   
   > farmyard that he decided to listen, anyhow.   
      
    CROW: Yeah, has Grumpy eaten, like, ever?   
    JOEL: If his whole issue is 'hangry' I'm swear ...   
      
   >                                             He told himself   
   > that he wouldn't take Fatty's advice unless it was much   
   > better than he expected.   
      
     TOM: A better plan than 'run in circles'?   
      
   >   
   >       "Well---go on!" he grunted.   
      
    CROW: Go on with your merry little schemes and plans.   
      
   >   
   >       "Do you see that little house near the woodshed?"   
      
     TOM: Is it little or is it far away?   
      
   > Fatty Raccoon asked him. "It has a low doorway that's always   
   > open, and no windows at all."   
      
    JOEL: Wait ...   
    CROW: Is ... is that the outhouse?   
      
   >   
   >       "Yes!" said Grumpy Weasel harshly. "Of course I see   
   > it. I'm not blind."   
      
     TOM: You sure?  Because 'blind as a weasel' sure sounds like it could be a   
   saying.   
      
   >   
   >       "Do you know who lives there?"   
      
    CROW: This *can't* be the outhouse, right?   
      
   >   
   >       "I always supposed that it belonged to Johnnie   
   > Green," said Grumpy.   
      
     TOM: He has to house his ineffectively caught pets somewhere.   
      
   >                      "His father is big and lives in the big   
   > house, and Johnnie is little and lives in the little house."   
      
    JOEL: [ As Fatty ] 'Well, then who lives in the wide house?'   
    CROW: [ As Grumpy ] 'The president.'   
    JOEL: [ As Fatty ] 'D'oh!'   
      
   >   
   >       Fatty Raccoon laughed merrily.   
      
    JOEL: [ As Fatty ] 'Sorry, just thought of a hilarious corn I ate this   
   morning.'   
      
   >   
   >       "You don't know as much as I thought you did!" he   
   > cried.   
      
     TOM: [ As Grumpy ] 'Yeah, well, I know things you never thought I didn't   
   know!'   
    CROW: [ As Fatty ] 'Yeah, I --- what?'   
      
   >        It may be that Fatty had set out to make Grumpy angry.   
   > Anyhow, Grumpy's eyes burned in the darkness like two coals   
   > of fire.   
      
    JOEL: Uh-oh, weasel's coming up to power.   
      
   >   
   >       "I'm right about that little house," he wrangled.   
      
     TOM: They throw away *way* too much trash *every* single *week*!  Something   
   is up there!   
      
   >   
   >       "Nonsense!" Fatty Raccoon exclaimed. And that made   
   > Grumpy angrier than ever.   
      
    JOEL: [ As Fatty, walking it back ] 'Uh ... partial sense?  In the right   
   contexts?'   
      
   >   
   >       "You learned that word of old Mr. Crow!" he grumbled.   
      
    CROW: Aw, I gifted 'Nonsense' to the world, anyone can have it.   
      
   > "It's his favorite expression; and I can't endure it."   
      
     TOM: Grumpy doesn't play favorites, he's an equal-opportunity non-endurer.   
      
   >   
   >       "You don't need to stay here and listen to it," Fatty   
   > Raccoon said.   
      
    CROW: You can listen to it anywhere on my new podcast!  Let me tell you the   
   Raccoon Supper Syndication feed!   
      
   >               "If you dared to you could run over to Johnnie   
   > Green's house (as you call it);   
      
     TOM: Stipulating for the benefit of counsel without making an admission with   
   regard to the house-ness of Johnnie Green.   
      
   >                                 and if you found that you   
   > were right about it I promise you I'd never say 'Nonsense'   
   > again."   
      
    JOEL: [ As Grumpy ] 'Hmm ... how close do I have to get so you promise you'll   
   never say 'Snackage' again?'   
      
   >   
   >       If Grumpy Weasel hadn't been so angry   
      
    CROW: He'd be any other character in this book.   
      
   >                                             perhaps he   
   > wouldn't have been so eager to prove himself right.   
      
     TOM: Grumpy strikes me as someone happy to let other people think wrong   
   things about him.   
      
   >                                                     While   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)