XPost: rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc, alt.tv.mst3k   
   From: nebusj-@-rpi-.edu   
      
   >   
   >   
   >       XIX   
      
    CROW: 1506 XIX XIX!   
      
   >   
   >       HIDING FROM HENRY HAWK   
      
     TOM: [ As Henry Gibson ] 'A hiding, by Henry Hawk.'   
      
   >   
   >       In the spring Grumpy Weasel was always glad   
      
    JOEL: No he was *not*!   
    CROW: [ Startled ]  Little harsh there.   
    JOEL: I have to put my foot down somewhere.   
      
   >                                                   to see   
   > the birds coming back from the South.   
      
     TOM: The birds had such a wonderful time visiting South Dakota.  Wall Drug,   
   the corn palace, the filming locations of North by Northwest ...   
      
   >                                       But it must not be   
   > supposed that it was because he liked to hear them sing (for   
   > he didn't!).   
      
    CROW: He signed up for this stupid bird-watching app and if he doesn't log   
   something every week it gets all whiny at him.   
      
   >   
   >       Nor should any one make the mistake of thinking that   
   > Grumpy Weasel loved the birds.   
      
    JOEL: Not after all the times someone asked if Grumpy wanted them to give him   
   the bird and ...   
    CROW: [ Raspberries ]   
      
   >                                The only reason why he   
   > welcomed them was because he liked to hunt them, and rob   
   > their nests.   
      
    JOEL: [ As Dan Backslide ] 'A NEST!  I'LL STEAL IT!  NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!'   
      
   >   
   >       But there were two birds that Grumpy didn't care to   
   > have in Pleasant Valley.   
      
    CROW: The Roc and Baby Huey.   
      
   >                          He often wished that Solomon Owl and   
   > Henry Hawk   
      
     TOM: Solomon Owl.  'en'ery Hawk.  _They're beaked!_   
      
   >            would leave the neighborhood and never return.   
   > That was because they liked to hunt him.   
      
    CROW: They'd like it more except hunting him means getting close to him.   
      
   >   
   >       Especially did Grumpy Weasel dislike Henry Hawk,   
      
    JOEL: His cartoons weren't *that* bad.   
     TOM: Eh ...   
      
   >                                                        who   
   > had an unpleasant habit of sitting motionless on a limb   
      
    CROW: [ As Grumpy ] 'Get off my tail.'   
     TOM: [ As Henry ] 'Are you sure a tail is a limb?'   
    CROW: [ As Grumpy ] 'MOOOOOOM!'   
      
   >                                                         in   
   > the top of some great tree.   
      
     TOM: I've seen better.   
      
   >                             From that high perch he swept the   
   > whole valley with his keen, cruel eyes,   
      
    JOEL: o/` These eyes have seen a lot of land ... o/`   
      
   >                                         because (as he said)   
   > he "liked to see what was going on."   
      
     TOM: [ As Henry ] 'Landslide!  ... Oh no, wait, Fatty Raccoon just tripped.'   
      
   >   
   >       If Henry Hawk saw anything anywhere that interested   
   > him he lost no time in reaching that place.   
      
     TOM: Oh now me I'm always putting time in a special place I won't forget and   
   then I can never find it again.   
      
   >                                             It might be a   
   > bird, or a meadow mouse, or maybe a plump chicken.   
      
    CROW: That's what's so great about him, he's not fussy.   
      
   >                                                    And he was   
   > always hoping to catch a glimpse of Grumpy Weasel.   
      
    JOEL: Oh anyone can catch a glimpse, that's easy.  It's weasels that are hard.   
      
   >   
   >       One day early in the fall Mr. Hawk saw what he had   
   > been looking for so long.   
      
     TOM: The first robin of spring!  You're *incredibly* late!   
    CROW: [ As a robin ] 'I'm very early!'   
      
   >                           Near the old cider mill, up the   
   > road from Farmer Green's house,   
      
    JOEL: No, no, back down, you've gone too far --- oh, that's the Moon,   
   nobody's going *there*.   
     TOM: It's too full.   
      
   >                                 he spied a long, slender,   
   > brownish shape moving swiftly among a pile of barrels outside   
   > the building.   
      
    CROW: *Four* Maurice Chevaliers?!   
      
   >               He knew at once that it was Grumpy Weasel;   
      
     TOM: Now, now, it might be Sulky Marten.   
    JOEL: I loved any game show hosted by Sulky Marten.   
      
   >                                                          and   
   > though he was a long way off Mr. Hawk could see that Grumpy   
   > was very busy looking for something   
      
    CROW: Grumpy!  Are you looking for love in all the wrong places?   
      
   >                                    ---so busy, Mr. Hawk   
   > hoped, that Grumpy wouldn't notice anything else.   
      
    JOEL: You know how it is when you're looking for something, you can't see   
   anything.   
     TOM: Now where did I put my thing?   
      
   >   
   >       Henry Hawk had wonderful eyesight.   
      
    CROW: [ As Emily Litella ] 'Now how can eye sighing be wonderful?'   
      
   >                                          As he came   
   > hurtling down out of the sky he could see that Grumpy was   
   > playing hide-and-seek with a mouse.   
      
     TOM: Oh, how sweet!  Everyone thinks he's mean and yet he goes out of his   
   way to play with the deprived mice ---   
    JOEL: [ Rests a hand on TOM's shoulder ]   
      
   >   
   >       "It's a shame to break up the game," Mr. Hawk   
   > chuckled to himself.   
      
    CROW: All tied in the fourteenth inning, too, too bad.   
      
   >   
   >       And just then something made Grumpy Weasel look up.   
      
     TOM: [ Yes's _It Can Happen_ ] o/` Look down!  There's a crazy world   
   outside! o/`   
      
   > It must have been Henry Hawk's shadow flickering over a   
   > barrel.   
      
    JOEL: Wait a minute, hawks don't come in barrels.   
      
   >         There was no other sign that could have warned   
   > Grumpy.   
      
    CROW: [ As Henry ] 'Except you, blabbermouth narrator.'   
      
   >   
   >       He put the meadow mouse out of his mind   
      
     TOM: Never try eating a mouse with your mind.   
    JOEL: You get cheesey thoughts.   
      
   >                                               without a bit   
   > of trouble and made a sidewise spring   
      
    CROW: Thank you, Coily!   
      
   >                                       for the first hole on   
   > which his eyes lighted.   
      
    JOEL: Oh no, it's the hole that only goes halfway!   
      
   >   
   >       Grumpy was through it in a twinkling.   
      
     TOM: Not halfway anymore.   
    JOEL: Try and escape hard enough and everything's a hole that goes all the   
   way through.   
      
   >                                             Henry Hawk made   
   > a frantic grab with his talons at the black tip of Grumpy's   
   > tail,   
      
    CROW: No no, it's marked 'lift other end'.   
      
   >       just as it whisked out of sight. But he was too late.   
      
    JOEL: Grumpy had called 'olly olly oxen-free'.   
      
   >   
   >       It did not soothe Henry Hawk's feelings to find that   
   > the meadow mouse had vanished at the same time.   
      
    CROW: Wait!  That mouse must be Atomic Mouse!   
      
   >                                                 Henry would   
   > have liked to play hide-and-seek with him himself.   
      
     TOM: Oh, what a happy valley this is!  Everyone is so playful!   
      
   >   
   >       Mr. Hawk knew well enough where Grumpy was hiding.   
      
    JOEL: [ As Henry ] 'I can pick up tips from the gabby narrator *too*.'   
      
   > That slim fellow had sought safety in an empty jug,   
      
    CROW: o/` Little brown jug, little brown jug, little brown jug I don't know   
   the other words! o/`   
      
   >                                                     which was   
   > lying on its side near the pile of barrels.   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)