From: noahidebooksforever@gmail.com   
      
   Star Wars: Children of the Force   
      
   (A Star Wars Fanfiction Universe)   
      
   HOPEFULLY PRODUCED BY WARNER BROTHERS   
      
      
      
   by Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly   
      
   Copyright Noahide Books   
      
      
      
      
      
   Amidala and the Fleet of the Dranzordians   
      
   Queen Amidala surveyed the host before her.  Dranzordians.  100 ships, all   
   hovering just above Naboo, threatening war unless their demands for one   
   particular Naboo resident were met.  But how could she hand him over?  How   
   could she possibly ever hand    
   over Jar Jar Binks, despite the claim from the Dranzordians that, upon   
   visiting Dranzordia as a diplomatic envoy of Naboo, Jar Jar had been ever so   
   careless in the royal Emporer of Dranzordia’s court, firstly by dropping his   
   jar of rare Naboo fish onto    
   the court floor, one of the fish springing up into the mouth of Princess   
   Drakzella, the Emporers daughter, and her nearly choking on it; secondly by   
   addressing the Prime Minister of Dranzordia as his royal highness and entering   
   into discussion with him,    
   before being correctly pointed towards the Emporer; and thirdly, and most   
   embarrassingly, upon turning towards the court, passing wind directly into the   
   face of the most highly honoured and esteemed Emporer.  And while they had let   
   him go and returned    
   him to Naboo, glad to be rid of him, the Emporer had subsequently flew into   
   such a rage that he demanded the head of dear old Jar Jar on a pike.  The   
   Queen was about to intervene.   
      
       
      
   Amidala’s face came onto the screen of the command centre of the flag ship,   
   were the Emporer from Dranzordia was sitting in his royal regalia, and she   
   began her well thought out speech.   
      
       
      
   ‘Dearest Emporer.  Naboo greets you and offers, in true humility, a million   
   apologies.  Dear Jar Jar is a most unpredictable character.  He has served us   
   well for many a year yet, in truth, he has the unfortunate ability to make   
   gross demands on the    
   patience of others in the exercising of his most exuberant personality.  Yet   
   this is the way the force has made him.  However, in the heart of Jar Jar lies   
   a soul which, in truth, would never harm even the slightest of intelligent   
   beings in a word of    
   hatred, for his soul is as pure and gentle as a dove, despite, how shall I   
   say, his most unfortunate mannerisms.  Please, forgive us dear Emporer.  We   
   offer in tribute a vessel laden with the finest delicacies Naboo has to offer,   
   and ample gold to have    
   made your great trip worthwhile.’  She left off speaking, waiting in the   
   Emporer.   
      
       
      
   He pulled himself up in all his glory, considered the vessel which was being   
   shown on the side screen, and finally assented.  ‘But please, Most   
   Honourable Queen Amidala, could you choose another honorable member of   
   Naboo’s council to be your    
   representative to Dranzordia in the future.’   
      
       
      
   ‘It will be as you say,’ responded the Queen, and in the corner Jar Jar   
   Binks sighed a deep sigh of relief.   
      
   The End   
      
      
      
   Han Solo and Leia's Legacy   
      
   'It's the Millennium Falcon II,' said Leia. 'I had it designed specially.'   
      
   'It's smaller,' said Han.   
      
   'For humbler egos. I'm sure a wookie can handle it.'   
      
   Chewbacca moaned.   
      
   'Chewie. I can handle the flying of the ship,' said Han. He turned to Leia.   
   'You made this for me Princess?'   
      
   'Hardly,' but she was smiling.   
      
      
      
   They were up above New Alderaan, the Space Citdael Community, testing the   
   ship. It was quick. Han was in his element.   
      
   'She handles well,' he said.   
      
   'Luke is a good designer,' replied Leia.   
      
   'Luke!' exclaimed Han. 'He designed this?'   
      
   'With Lando's help,' smiled Leia. '4 years of study of at Academy paid off for   
   Skywalker,' she said. 'His great-grandfather helped him also.'   
      
   'Dalar Skywalker? Shmi's father?' queried Han.   
      
   'He's not all there,' said Leia. 'Father is so old, but he did it out of love.'   
      
   Han put out his hand and touched Leia's cheek. 'Watto had redeeming qualities,   
   in the end. Telling Luke about Shmi's heritage.'   
      
   'We're lucky. We know our family now,' said Leia. 'Anyway, come on General   
   Solo. Show me what an old fool can do.'   
      
      
      
   And as the Millennium Falcon II flew around New Alderaan, Han Solo was in his   
   element, eternally indebted to the name of Skywalker once again.   
      
   The End   
      
      
      
   The Dark Side of Chewbacca   
      
   Chewbacca had brought some of the finest Coruscant wine onboard the Millennium   
   Falcon II, and was steadily consuming it all afternoon.   
      
   'Your drunk,' said Han Solo.   
      
   'Awwww,' replied Chewbacca.   
      
   'We have a Sith Lord scoping us out,' said Han Solo. 'I feel all that dark   
   side all over the ship.'   
      
   'Awwww,' moaned Chewbacca.   
      
   'Get your act together, Chewie. I need some fine flying.'   
      
   Chewbacca burped, and then hugged Han Solo and started singing.   
      
      
      
   Darth Insanus was monitoring the Millennium Falcon II. He had his sensors on   
   the ship, and tuned in to hear what was being said.   
      
   Next to him, officer Rambart said 'Is that a wookie singing? He sounds   
   terrible.'   
      
   Darth Insanus glared at Rambart but kept on listening.   
      
      
      
   'I know,' said Han Solo, comforting Chewbacca. 'You miss home.'   
      
   'Awwww,' moaned Chewbacca, and suddenly farted.   
      
      
      
   'What was that noise?' asked Darth Insanus to Rambart.   
      
   'It was disgusiting,' commented Rambart. 'It must be some horrible new weapon   
   of the Rebellion.'   
      
   Darth Insanus considered his options.   
      
      
      
   Han had put on nose plugs, and gotten the mop out. Chewie had vomited up all   
   over the control deck.   
      
      
      
   'That noise was equally as hideous,' said Darth Insanus, still listening in.   
      
   'We best report it to the New Emporer,' replied Rambart.   
      
   Darth Insanus considered the situation. Whatever vile creature the Rebellion   
   now had, his Emporer must be informed of a possible new threat to the New   
   Empire.   
      
   'Let us – Depart,' spoke Darth Insanus valiantly.   
      
   Rambart responded immediately, glad to be leaving the place.   
      
      
      
      
      
      
      
   Later that week.   
      
   'A Millennium Falcon III? What happened to the second one?' queried a puzzled   
   Leia Organa.   
      
      
      
   Han Solo refrained from commenting on the condition of his ship.   
      
      
      
   Some things are better left unsaid.   
      
   The End   
      
      
      
   Han Solo and Luke Skywalker on the trail of Misfax the Cyborg   
      
   Luke examined the lightsaber. 'It's Sith made,' he said to Han Solo.   
      
   'They're back,' said Han. 'I feel it in the force.'   
      
   'You feel it in the force?' queried the Jedi Knight.   
      
   'A hunch, blondie,' responded the swaggering General.   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)