486909c3   
   XPost: alt.food.vegan.science, alt.cooking-chat, rec.food.cooking   
   XPost: sci.chem   
   From: cotrndog@yahoo.com   
      
   "GreenXenon"  wrote in message   
   news:5af3a0b4-adca-4e3d-9cf9-d537a13b442b@p19g2000prg.googlegroups.com...   
      
   Hi all:   
      
   This is not a spam/troll post.   
      
   I’m currently daydreaming of a hypothetical diet that I desperately   
   would like to live off of. This product that is vegan-friendly and has   
   all the nutrients of vegetables, fruits, herbs, algae, seaweed, and   
   other non-animal organisms that are necessary/beneficial for human   
   health. It also contains beneficial and essential microbes [such as   
   probiotics]. All the aforementioned are in amounts optimum for human   
   health.   
      
   This product is completely organic and free of any pesticides,   
   synthetic ethylene and other man-made substances that compromise the   
   heath of foods and their human consumers. In addition, no organisms   
   used in the product are genetically-engineered or irradiated. Equally   
   important is the environment used to grow these organisms is healthy,   
   organic, and free of pollutants.   
      
   This product may be extremely healthy to live off of. However, it will   
   likely taste bad. To make this product consumable, an orogastric tube   
   – made of health-friendly, eco-friendly, non-abrasive material --   
   included. An orogastric tube coats the entire mouth and throat all the   
   way down to the stomach. This tube directly and safely transports the   
   product into the consumer's stomach and can even do so in the complete   
   absence of peristalsis.   
      
   Prior to the making of this product, all proteins & fats are pre-   
   digested completely, and the following substances are completely   
   removed from the plants:   
      
   1. Any carbohydrate that raises blood sugar. These carbohydrates are   
   bad for health. Soluble fibers [such as inulin] are not removed at all   
   as they don’t count as net carbs. Simple sugars and digestible   
   starches are completely removed. Insoluble fibers [such as cellulose]   
   are also completely removed as they don’t offer much benefit other   
   than to add bulk to the stools.   
   2. Unhealthy amino acids   
   3. Glycerol [which is unnecessary calories and can be produced by the   
   body]   
   4. Saturated fatty acids [which contribute to atherosclerosis]   
   5. Trans fatty acids [which are far worse for health than saturated   
   fatty acids]   
   6. Any other substance that is known not to be beneficial or necessary   
   for health -- such as the caffeine in coffee/teas   
      
   All organisms used in this product – excluding tomatoes -- are raw.   
   Tomatoes are boiled to bring out the lycopenes.   
      
   To make the product healthier, bad minerals [such as lead and   
   thallium] are completely removed [assuming any of them happen to   
   somehow be in the product]. To decrease blood pressure, sodium and   
   chloride are decreased [but not completely removed]. The sodium is   
   decreased as much as can be without leading to symptoms of sodium   
   deficiency. The chloride is decreased as much as possible without   
   causing any serious symptoms of chloride deficiency – the consumer   
   should still be able to safely perform tasks taken for granted – such   
   as driving or operating machinery. The decrease in chloride will help   
   balance out the acidity caused by ketosis. To help prevent kidney   
   stones during ketosis, extra potassium ions are added to the product.   
   The potassium is also alkaline and will further assist the body in   
   keeping itself non-acidic during ketosis. In addition, the extra   
   potassium is added because the body responds to chlorine deficiency by   
   making the kidney excrete potassium. So more potassium must be   
   consumed to make up for this loss.   
      
   The product has drinking water added to it to make it easier to drink.   
      
   This product is in small health-friendly, eco-friendly bottles. Five   
   bottles per day should be consumed. The bottles are in a package and   
   are of different sizes. The biggest bottle should be consumed in the   
   morning. The smallest should be consumed in the evening. In between,   
   are bottles of different sizes. Earlier in the day, the bigger bottles   
   should be consumed and as the day progresses the smaller bottles   
   should be consumed. This routine follows the saying “eat breakfast   
   link a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper” – except   
   the food is divided into 5 smaller meals instead of 3 bigger meals.   
   This is an extra benefit to diabetes patients.   
      
   It is important to understand that this product will initially not   
   satiate it’s users. However, once ketosis kicks in, appetite will   
   decrease and consumers will no longer feel the urge to eat.   
      
   To summarize, the substances in the product are chopped and ground as   
   finely as possible [tomatoes are boiled prior to this]. Second, the   
   proteins/fats are pre-digested all the way down to their monomers   
   [amino acids in the case of proteins, fatty acids & glycerol in the   
   case of fats]. Third, the undesirable substances are removed. Fourth,   
   good microbes, potassium ions, and drinking water are added. Finally,   
   all the substances are blended together.   
      
   There still will be fat in this product, it's just that they will be   
   broken down to fatty acids [and the glycerol portions removed] prior   
   to bottling. Many fatty acids are necessary and/or beneficial for   
   health. They also assist in the absorption of fat-soluble vitamins.   
      
   If this product did exist it would greatly benefit obese patients. I   
   just wish someone would start a company, get the company to make this   
   theoretical product, and sell it to the general public at a reasonable   
   price.   
      
   Here is my question.   
      
   I would like to live off this product and eat it in the aforementioned   
   manner. Is there any hope? If not, then I may go psycho and do   
   something that both me and everyone around me will eternally regret --   
   no comment on what this action is.   
      
   All I ask is to experience a complete healthy life that is totally   
   free of any physical disability -- such as stroke, heart-attack,   
   blindness, paralysis, etc. If that's asking too much, then society   
   deserves some severe punishment. As a law-abiding individual, I should   
   have the unchallenged right to be completely non-handicapped -- in the   
   physical sense -- regardless of my budget.   
      
   ****************************************************************   
   *************************   
      
   They have this.  It is called "Proto Food" and it is what they feed to   
   the astronauts.   
      
   The star ship Enterprise also feeds this to all crew members.  That is   
   the product that comes out of the replicators.   
      
   There is also another product called iCandy and is sold by Apple Inc.   
   It is Steve Jobs turd wrapped in an Apple wrapper.  All the Mac   
   computer users eat as much as they can get.   
      
   What type of mushroom have you been eating and living under?   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)