From: denisesharpe15@yahoo.com   
      
   1993 not only had I kept writing to Carl asking why he wouldn't talk to me, I   
   begged for an answer I wrote "please just answer my question are you getting   
   my letters, just send me a yes or a no" That was a dumb question, but I wrote   
   it..   
      
   At the beginning of 1994, I was finally getting a bit better, enough to get a   
   new job. But it was very rough at first. I was afraid of the unknown, still   
   not getting answers and afraid I was being stalked. I tried so hard to keep it   
   together without    
   crying in front of people for no reason. But I loved secretarial work, it's   
   what I did most of my life. At this new job, I was an office assistant,   
   receptionist, customer service, did banking and anything else they'd throw at   
   me, but I didn't mind, it    
   helped by keeping me busy.   
      
   It was Valentine's Day and I arrived at work early and I was mostly alone in   
   the office. The phone rang and I answered with my usual greeting of the   
   company name and "may I help you?" It was a man with a British accent and he   
   said "Can I have your fax    
   number?" I was shaking. His voice sounded familiar. I gave him our fax number   
   and then hung up. A man with a British accent never called the office while I   
   was working there. I had to know what fax he was sending. I went over to the   
   fax machine waiting    
   and shaking as the paper came out so slowly. Big letters at the top of the   
   page were slowly coming through and I waited until I saw in big letters PALMER   
   at the top of the page. I felt sick and I took the paper to my desk and just   
   stared at it and my    
   hands and the paper were shaking. Then I realized where I had heard that voice   
   before, he sounded like ELP's manager, the one I talked to on the phone when   
   he called my house. I put the fax in with my bosses other mail. It was from a   
   company in Canada    
   that we hadn't been doing business with. My boss didn't seem interested in it.   
   I didn't ask him about it. I believe the name of the ELP manager, who I talked   
   to on the phone both times, was Stuart Young.   
      
   One day when I came home from work, there was a letter for me. It was from   
   Victory Music in California, where I was sending my letters. It was a yellow   
   paper an advertisement and in big black letters it read "YES" and smaller   
   letters underneath read "   
   Talk". It was so haunting that I finally got my Yes reply, but the message was   
   probably in the lyrics. I wanted to know why he was doing this to me. I didn't   
   understand. I wanted it all to end. So I would buy the album and listen to it.   
   Looking for an    
   answer.    
      
   Some of the lyrics in the album were "Talk, like the first words ever to reach   
   out to you" Carls first words to me were "don't you talk". I met him in   
   spring. "First calling in a silent spring" The song "I am waiting" is a   
   conversation between two people.   
    And one song called "Where will you be" lyrics are "When will I know when you   
   are gone where will you lie?" Made me think about where I'll be    
   uried..actually down the street from me is the cemetery where my parents are   
   buried and I was to be buried    
   someday. Down the street like where Carl was jogging from? Passing a hedgerow   
   like mine? Then the lyrics from "Endles Dream"...
Temptation may come hope   
   your vision doesn't stray
...In the name of God you may be forced   
   away...
Temptation may come    
   hope your
 Conscience doesn't hide
..The longest trip you'll take is   
   inside
..I bring this to you this gift of love   
      
   While listening to the music on the way to work, I stopped my car on a bridge   
   over an expressway. I was tempted towards taking the longest trip below, I was   
   being forced away, I was tempted towards the endless dream..I opened the car   
   door and the wind    
   was in my face. I put one foot on the pavement and started to rise off the   
   seat. All of a sudden I had the thought of my son, who I could never leave.   
   And I got back in the car and shut the door.   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)