From: joemahoney1950@gmail.com   
      
   My like-minded lickers of the livid lichen, this moanin as my aged mutha   
   brought in my breffis...   
      
   Wait, lemme tellya whata typical breffis IS iffa you happen to be Joe "Large   
   and in Charge" Mahoney.  It's first off, an enormous platta of TURDucken.  A   
   great, ozzin bowl of cornbret stuffin.  A entiya BOX of Peppridge Fom Toast.    
   Finely, a few 6-packs    
   of Mountain Dew and a pile o pop tots.  Yep.  You wish you was me, doncha?    
   And I haven't even toldya yet bout my latest shipperment of Videogames.   
      
   Speaking of which, my mom was quite worried recently as she deliba'd my   
   massive breffis.  She was stressed out by an otticle in the Boston Globe   
   called "Video Games Can Be 'Hunting Grounds'."  It was about how fat old   
   perverts use their Videogames and X-   
   boxes to pursue little boys.     
      
   "I've heard the way you talk to those little boys, Joe-dear, and I'm worried."   
      
   How do ya know their little boys?   
      
   "Because I can hear their squeaky pre-pubescent voices through the enormous   
   headset I purchased for you last month."   
      
   Was a my pitcha in the papa?   
      
   "No, Joe, but the predators it described were just like you."   
      
   For a second or two I worried I Joe Mahoney might hafta give up my favorite   
   hobbies.  Then a message was transmitted to me (definately from Godd), and I   
   felt peace (also stottid fillin my Depends with Turducken).     
      
   I let out a massive BELCH, jiggled my joystick, hooted, and resumed my X-Box   
   buggery.   
      
   "It's fine," I told her.  "Nobody reads news papa's no moa."   
      
   Joe "Large and in Charge-- and in need of a Diaper Change" Mahoney   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)