XPost: talk.politics.misc, alt.politics, alt.fan.rush-limbaugh
XPost: alt.atheism
From: super70s@super70s.invalid
In article ,
cicero venatio wrote:
> Expect Trump's latest Presidential Decree proclaiming himself Pope and
> warning the Vatican that he'll cut their funding and burn RC churches if
> they push back.
Pope-elect Donald the First had this to say as he spoke from the Rose
Garden:
"I am honored to be your new spiritual lighthouse, and the first MAGA
Pope. I promise Evangelical Catho-licks and Prostates alike that
I will be embodied in salvation and fair in the performance of my
duties.
I am obliged to try to save as many lost souls as I can, at least
the Devout Wealthy Elite Souls, as it is well known that Heaven is
a very select place, indeed, it is more exclusive than even
Mar-A-Lago (heretofore known as Vatican West) and the Trump Golf
Clubs. It is a members' only Heaven. I may have to put a fence
around it.
I will perform miracles in a fair and balanced manner. Just as God
used to wipe out entire races of people without warning, burning
whole towns of perverts, killing off entire nations, and drowning
everybody without a ticket to board Noah's Ark, I shall deliver the
world from Evil Empires like Ukraine, Greenland and Panama as I
unleash the Apocalypse Wrath of Revelations.
I will ensure the Rapture and will not allow those awful Lib'rul
Sissy Homosapiens to marry each other and I will put and end to the
Clergy-marrying Choirboys and Satan-worshipping Transsexuals.
I will lead the Crusades against all them towel-headed heathens-
possessed voodoo-hoodoo barbarians who's Pseudo-religions that
don't accept the Lord as the Light of my Plutocracy, and who
worship fake, made-up gods.
They shall suffer my Godly Far-Right Wrath and I will Destroy
them with my Cherubic Armies of Angels and they shall burn for
eternity in Hell, because Pope Donald the First and God don't take
no prisoners!
Amen."
--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)
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