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|    alt.religion.new    |    Sortof like the Flying Spaghetti Monster    |    684 messages    |
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|    Message 448 of 684    |
|    Enochide Videos Bible to All    |
|    Son of Springvale (1/9)    |
|    13 Aug 17 18:54:04    |
      From: karaitenoahide@gmail.com              Son of Springvale              The theophany was born on the 20th of November in 6179 in the reckoning of the       adjusted calendar of Haven Noahide Fellowship, the year 2016 in the regular       common era calendar. He was born in Cooma hospital, but lived his early life       in Springvale, a small        tiny township south of Dalgety, found on few maps it was so small. His father       was Jeremiah Debear, and he was a regular father, attendant of the United       Pentecostal Church, but young Wolfgang Debear did not 100% agree with his       father's conclusions that        Jesus Christ Almighty was exactly that – the living God. He did not agree at       all.              When Wolfgang turned 25 he started suffering from Schizophrenia, and heard       voices. And then he had a psychotic attack, refused the medications his       parent's suggested, and drifted off out onto the back roads of southern Monaro       region, were he wandered        until he was 40. 15 years of crazy adventures, were voices told him he was       God, and he believed them as well. Who else could Wolfgang be apart from God       Almighty? If there was a God, it wasn't Jesus, it was Wolfgang. But he never       took it that seriously,        especially after his 39th year when an Eternal Voice said to him, 'TIME TO GET       SERIOUS WOLFGANG.'              Wolfgang drifted into Canberra, into Tuggeranong, and having his birth       certificate with him, which he'd had in his wallet for the last 15 years, he       registered with Centrelink, who said he'd need an address, so they put him on       the emergency housing list,        and found him a place in his 40th year. It was in Gilmore, in Alice Jackson       Crescent. And then the Cherubim Daniel Daly, 347th Cherubim of the Realm of       Eternity, dropped by one afternoon, having chatted with him at the Chisholm       shops, and they started        talking about the Universal Faith Assembly, and God had found his calling in       life. Head pastor of the the Universal Faith Assembly of the 7 Divine       Fellowships, and Daniel delivered him the complete works of Melanie C on CD       and said 'She's our Girl'.              God married in his 41st year, a lady he had converted to membership of the       Universal Faith Assembly. She was a pretty lady, and she liked God. April was       her first name, and she became April Debear. And they had a child which he       named 'David' and God was        happy. Wolfgang was happy.              * * * * *              In his years wandering around, Wolfgang had dropped into Canberra a number of       times, sitting on the steps of Calvary Chapel a lot, were his father went to       church, the family driving up from Springvale once a month to attend. He saw       his dad often, who        gave him regular cash, and watched Wolfgang as he wandered around Chifley       oval, which was next to the church, and sat up in the corner of the oval, in a       quiet section, just nearby a set of flats called Chifley house. But most of       the time he was wandering        around Tuggeranong when his wanderings brought him to Canberra a few times a       year, and he wandered around, sleeping in parks and ovals, and knew the place       quite well by his 40th year. In Macarthur playing fields Daniel Daly had met       him a number of times,        and he'd advised the lad often to sort his life out. Wolfgang drank alcohol,       never to excess and never ever got drunk, but he enjoyed a drop to get him       through the nights. He had a warm sleeping bag he slept in at nights, and       drank water from taps most        of the time, or from the Snowy or Murrumbidgee rivers, or various other       creeks, but always seemed to have enough cash when he was hungry for a       hamburger or some hot chips and gravy or some other cafe food he enjoyed       eating. Daniel helped him financially,        as well as his father, and Wolfgang was a wildman in some ways, Mr Natural,       lost off his his psychotic fantasies, an adventurous world of his own       imaginations. There was nothing quite like God's younger years, and although       he was alone a lot of the time,        somehow he didn't mind. He was on endless crusades to redeem mankind in his       hear, the calling of his young life, and the voices always told him he was       saving the world. His crazy missions were all part of the masterplan for the       salvation of mankind.        Wolfgang knew that was true – somehow.              He met April, actually, when he was about 30, as she lived in Gilmore, and she       said he was a crazy sweet kind of guy, and though she was only 15, she said       she could marry a guy like him. He never forgot that.              His adventures always made sense for a while, and he would read his King James       Bible, and know that Salvation was of the LORD, and his mission was to redeem       them all. Somehow he made the Sun rise one night, although it actually rose at       its correct time,        but Wolfgang knew his prayers at what was surely midnight were answered. There       were all sorts of redemptive works he accomplished, all in his own heart, his       own little world of imagination, but, when his late 30s started coming along,       he started calming        down. And the then the voice of the Almighty, and Wolfgang was mostly over it.       Time to finally settle down.              * * * * *              'Wolfgang. I have noticed something on the computer.'              Wolfgang was nervous.              'On our youtube account. A lot of American African pop artists. Females,       especially.'              Wolfgang breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn't found the porn. 'Uh, yeh. Is       that unusual?' he asked April.              'No. Not really. It's just that there is an awful lot of them. Especially       Rihanna. You must have favourited her entire video career and live       performances.'              'Uh, yeh,' he responded, and came in from the laundry, through the hall, to       the main living room were April was watching TV. 'Just got a thing for Afro       women,' said Wolfgang.              'Yet you married me,' she said.              'Love knows no boundaries,' he said softly.              She picked up the remote and changed the challenge to a nature show. They sat       in silence for a while, and she rested against him. 'Just don't cheat on me       with any nigger bitch,' she said after a while. God nodded.                            A few weeks later Daniel Daly was around, and they were discussing matters       pertinent to the Universal Faith Assembly.                     [continued in next message]              --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05        * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)    |
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