From: quilisma@cox.net
TITLE: A Very Exclusive Club
AUTHOR: Rusty
STATUS/PART: complete
CATEGORY: Crossover (X-Files)
EMAIL: quilisma@cox.net
RATING: *** ADULTS ONLY ***
PAIRING: Josh / Sam / Will / Toby / Danny / Walter / Fox / Alex / OMCs,
mix and match
SPOILERS: no, not really
DISCLAIMER: don=t own >em; no harm; no foul; no profit; would you
consider weekend leasing?
WARNING: SERIOUS kinks
TRANSLATIONS:
AFeebs@ - FBI agents
AThe Three Feebs@ - Alex Krycek, Fox Mulder, Walter Skinner
APotus@ - President of the United States (Jed Bartlet)
A VERY EXCLUSIVE CLUB
The Secretary smile sympathetically.
APlease relax, Josh. Our security hasn=t been breeched in over one
hundred years. Your membership card is blank ... no name, no membership
number. The data strip on the back can only be read by our scanners, and
the only information it contains is the fact that the bearer is a
paid-up member in good standing. If you should lose it, there=s no
information on it for anyone else to make use of. There are no
membership lists. Dues are paid in cash, and the card is reactivated
each time ... here, in this office. Membership is by referral only. The
premises, the garage, and the surrounding area are swept daily for
surveillance equipment, courtesy of your sponsors. I believe they have
also arranged for you to come and go anonymously.@
AI can=t help but worry ...@
AJosh, in the past hundred years, our security has never been breeched.
Never. During that time we=ve numbered Presidents, Congressmen, and
Supreme Court Justices among our members. If a place like this didn=t
exist, one would have to be created. It=s in our members= mutual best
interests to maintain that security.@
Josh nodded.
AA steward will take you to your room, and then show you around. If you
have any questions or needs, please feel free to ask, and do enjoy your
stay.@
Josh rose and shook hands with the Secretary.
AThank you, sir.@
#####
Josh took in the comfortable, masculine, understated room ... he also
noted some of the >amenities=. He turned to the steward.
AUm ... Jim, could you help me out here?@
AOf course, sir.@
AWhat=s considered appropriate attire?@
AIn the restaurant, coat and tie, except for formal occasions and galas
... then it=s white-tie ... but those are always announced ahead of
time, and formal attire can be rented on the premises; in the café,
casual street clothes; in the coffee shop, shorts and singlet, or a robe
... oh ... and you can order meals sent up from all three, if you like;
in the gym, shorts and singlet; in the pool and jacuzzi, nothing,
unless you prefer to wear swim trunks ... most gentlemen don=t wear
anything; in the other common areas and the halls, shorts, a towel, or a
robe; in the various rooms upstairs, whatever you like, or nothing.@
AWhat would you suggest I wear for the tour?@
AWell, sir, aside from its location, the restaurant is no different from
any other fine upscale restaurant in the District ... so unless you=d
like to have dinner in the restaurant or the cafe, shorts and singlet
would be appropriate for touring the rest of the club.@
AJim, are you assigned to me?@
AI can be, if you like. There is a core full-time staff who are assigned
to members who use the club on a regular basis, and a pool of part-time
staff who are assigned on a rotating basis to those who don=t. Even so,
if you wish to request a particular staff member, you can call ahead and
do so. You=ll find we=re pretty much interchangeable, and utterly
unflappable.@
Josh chuckled.
AI can imagine you=d have to be.@
AThe only real reason for having an assigned steward is if a gentleman
has certain requirements, or requires assistance. In that case, it would
be tiresome to have to repeat the instructions over and over again.@
AWhat if I meet someone I know?@
AGreet them by first name only, if you like ... no titles, no last names
... and go about your business. And, by the way, as the Secretary told
you, members never discuss who=s a member here and who=s not, even with
other members. You=re here; they=re here. They know about you; you know
about them. And never discuss the club *outside* the club. As the
Secretary explained, the Founders and Board of Governors of this
establishment have a very old-fashioned code of honor. Anyone who makes
any attempt to use information gained within these walls is immediately
barred for life, and sued for breech of contract. There hasn=t been an
incident since before the turn of the century. The threat is sufficient
deterrent. Most members have a great deal to lose.@
Josh gulped and nodded.
Jim gestured toward Josh=s suitcase.
APlease allow me to put away your things. As you know, this room is
yours, and yours alone. Some members live here full-time; many gentlemen
use the club for a hotel when they have to be in town on business, or a
place to change when they wish to dress for dinner or the opera without
having to go home ... that sort of thing. Many make use of the gym on a
regular basis ... having your own room allows you to leave gym attire
here, and gives you a place to rest and relax. Put laundry and
dry-cleaning in the bags provided and set them outside your door.
Laundry and dry-cleaning is same-day one-hour service. The same applies
to shoes ... just put them out if you want them shined.@
Josh frowned.
AThe dues can=t possibly cover all this ...@
Jim smiled.
AThey don=t. There=s a *very* substantial endowment fund. Membership is
actually based on a complex formula of merit and achievement, as well as
referrals, and dues are on a sliding scale.@
AI see. Well, I didn=t bring much with me, so let me change and we=ll do
the tour.@
APlease allow me to assist you.@
Jim deftly helped Josh out of his suit and hung it up in the closet. He
laid out a singlet and shorts and went into the bathroom to put away
Josh=s toiletries while Josh changed into them.
AReady?@
Josh took a deep breath.
AYeah. I guess.@
#####
Josh tried not to stare as Jim showed him some of the more >private=
areas.
AThis place was modeled on the Hellfire Club in London, wasn=t it?@
Jim chuckled.
AActually, it started out as an American branch of the Hellfire Club. It
later became independent.@
As they neared the end of the tour, Josh turned a corner and bumped into
another man.
AI=m sorry ... I ...@
Josh stopped and stared. The other man tried to retreat, but Josh
stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.
ASam. It=s OK.@
He turned to Jim.
AIf the tour=s about done, I think Sam and I will go have a beer.@
AVery good, sir.@
Josh chuckled.
ASam, you can quit doing your suffocating goldfish imitation now. Let=s
go get that beer.@
Sam was sitting with his head in his hands when Josh came back from the
bar with the beers. Josh gently tipped his head up and grinned.
[continued in next message]
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