From: kyouryokusenshi@michirutenou.com   
      
   Title: Monica's Innermost Secret   
      
   Author: Kyouryoku Senshi   
      
   Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me; they belong to their   
   respective owners.   
      
   Summary: John, I have a confession…he was more than just my lover.   
   John…Brad is my ex husband.   
      
   John was sitting up late in the X-Files office reading over some   
   government sites, and accidentally hit the wrong link and when he   
   moved the cursor to click on back; his eyes came to rest on the small   
   font on the screen.   
      
   His mouth dropped open in horror as he skimmed over the small font of   
   the webpage, and without realizing it he kept re-reading it over again   
   until he had it engraved in his head.   
      
   "No way…" he trailed off as his cell phone brought him out of his   
   trance like state   
      
   Removing his eyes from the screen he took his cell out of his jacket   
   pocket and answered. "John Doggett."   
      
   "Hey...it's me."   
      
   "Monica?" He asked in confirmation even though he knew the owner of   
   that voice as much as he knew the back of his hand, or so he thought   
      
   "Yeah…where are you? I've been trying your house phone but haven't   
   gotten any answer."   
      
   "Oh, yeah I'm still wound up in the office…" Doggett trailed off   
   usually he felt comfortable speaking to Monica about anything in his   
   life more than anything but now it was if she'd become a distant   
   stranger within the moments he'd just read her profile   
      
   "John, it's eight o' clock at night…"   
      
   "Yeah…I've been working on this case report and…"   
      
   "Hey, it's alright…anyway, I was just wondering if we could get   
   together tonight…there's something I need to talk to you about…it's   
   important." Monica insisted   
      
   "That's fine…I'm leaving in a few minutes anyway…so how about you meet   
   me at my apartment…and order us some pizza or something, you have the   
   key…"   
      
   "Alright…I'll see you then." Monica replied before hanging up   
      
   John placed his phone back in his pocket and finally removed his eyes   
   away from the laptop computer screen and shut the computer down before   
   he placed it back in his briefcase and turned off everything in the   
   office before leaving.   
      
   The font of the words was still stuck in his mind as he left the   
   building wondering what would await them both next.   
      
   As Monica headed over to John's she replayed over and over in her mind   
   how she would have to bring this up to John and what his reaction   
   might be, she knew he would be shocked but after that, she wasn't sure   
   what would come up next.   
      
   Upon arriving to John's apartment, she had phoned in the pizza and   
   poured each of them a glass of wine that John had in his fridge and   
   placed them on the class coffee table which was in front of the couch.   
      
   When she was finished setting up the classes, she took a seat on the   
   couch and glanced at her watch knowing that as every second drew near,   
   was a second closer to having to reveal a secret that she's been in   
   denial of for years to John.   
      
   Part of her was so anxious to have John get back so the faster she   
   could get the secret out and over with before the other part decided   
   to flee. And as if on cue, she heard the sound of a key insert in the   
   doorknob on the other side of the door before John stepped in and   
   closed the door behind him.   
      
   He was in a daze and didn't seem to notice Monica's presence until he   
   had taken a few steps further into the room and snapped out if his   
   trance like state. "Oh…hey Monica…" John trailed off   
      
   Monica sensed the discomfort pass between them both and felt John's   
   insecurity, if she didn't know any better, she'd say he was on to her.   
   Moments passed after John's awkward greeting and to relieve the   
   tension floating between them, Monica spoke.   
      
   "I poured us some wine…and the pizza should be here soon…we should   
   talk." She urged   
      
   John nodded and reluctantly moved to sit next to Monica. Normally he   
   would take great comfort in her presence…but now it was as if she had   
   become a complete stranger."   
      
   As Monica picked up her glass of wine, she handed one to John.   
   "Thanks." Monica merely nodded as she slipped off her heals and tried   
   her best to make herself comfortable. "So…what is it that you wanted   
   to talk about…?" John trailed off as he took in Monica's reluctance   
   "…You can tell me anything, you know that."   
      
   Monica took a sip of her wine and swallowed before she began to speak.   
   "Well, John…I hope you will understand my reason's for not bringing   
   this up sooner…because sometimes I still find it hard to accept myself   
   even though it's in the past…" Monica railed off as she watched for   
   Doggett's reaction   
      
   Eager and yet afraid of what Monica might tell him he spoke up "Go on…"   
      
   "Anyway the reason I wanted to talk to you tonight…is well, uh…John, I   
   have a confession…he was more than just my lover. John…Brad is my ex   
   husband." Monica exhaled glad she was finally able to get this off of   
   her chest   
      
   However, John wasn't so relieved; his mouth had fallen open in shock   
   but not surprise. "What!?"   
      
   "John, relax it's not a big deal…we're divorced."   
      
   "How long have we known each other now, Monica? Five years? And just   
   now you decide to drop this bombshell 'Oh, I forgot to tell you I'm   
   married', so please forgive me if I can do anything but relax!" He   
   said sarcastically   
      
   "Was married…past tense, John."   
      
   "I don't believe this!"   
      
   "John…"   
      
   "No…don't tell me, you have kids now too? What else haven't you told me!?"   
      
   Monica shook her head "No, we were only married for six months."   
      
   "That's not the point. How do you expect to be in a relationship with   
   someone when you're keeping secrets…I didn't want this to be true."   
   John said a he paced the living room with his head in his hands   
      
   "What are you talking about?" Monica asked suspiciously   
      
   "Earlier in the office…I had gone online and was going through the   
   government's site when I landed in your profile…it said you were   
   divorced…but I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe   
   that there was a chance that you were hiding something from me…I mean   
   how do I know that you're not hiding anything else?" John sighed   
   before he finally decided to move back over next to Monica and took a   
   seat with his head in his hands   
      
   Monica watched him and placed her hand on his back, waiting for John   
   to ask the question she'd been expecting him to ask.   
      
   "Why didn't you tell me?" John finally asked as he turned to look at   
   Monica next to him   
      
   Sensing his change in attitude, his calmer state of mind…Monica spoke.   
      
   "I've been in denial John, even I didn't want to accept that I was   
   married to him, but I have to face facts…accept it and move forward   
   with my life. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner John, and I can   
   understand what you're going through right now…and I don't blame you,   
   but please understand that this wasn't easy for me either." Monica   
   said calmly   
      
   John only nodded "But how do I know you're not hiding anything else?"   
   he smirked   
      
   Monica smiled "Trust me when I say that I'm not…It's hard for me to   
   keep too much from you John, believe me."   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)