From: msnsc21@yahoo.com   
      
   Reimagined: IWTB   
   By ML   
      
   -x-   
      
   Chapter Eleven - Good Luck   
      
   Dana Scully was beyond tired.  She sat in the empty surgeon's locker   
   room, still in her scrubs, writing up her surgical notes.  She had no   
   idea what time it was, but her exhaustion told her it had been a long   
   day, and it wasn't over yet.   
      
   She didn't hear the outer door open, and she started a little when a   
   familiar voice said, "And people say *I* went underground..."   
      
   She looked up to see Mulder's half-smile.  He looked pretty tired,   
   too, but he seemed elated.   
      
   "I'm sorry, Mulder," she said, glancing down at her notes.  "I'm   
   trying to keep my focus here."   
      
   He sat down beside her.  "It's the boy, isn't it?"  He'd almost   
   forgotten Scully's patient in the events of the day, and he felt a   
   twinge of guilt for it.   
      
   She nodded, not meeting his eyes.   
      
   "I thought there was nothing to be done for him," he prodded gently.   
      
   "I'm taking a big chance on something," she said.  "A radical new   
   procedure."   
      
   "The one you said last night wasn't an option?"   
      
   She nodded, still looking down at her notes.   
      
   "What made you change your mind?"   
      
   Scully rose and turned away, unwilling to answer his direct question.   
      
   Mulder waited for her reply, chewing his lip thoughtfully.  He had a   
   sense that there was something she wasn't telling him, wasn't ready   
   to tell him.  This was familiar, but it had been a long time since   
   he'd felt her withholding something from him.  He changed tack.   
      
   "When will you know if it's a success?"   
      
   "This is the first of a series of procedures," Scully said, "and we   
   won't really know the outcome until they're done."  She looked at him   
   as he nodded.  "But that's not what you came to talk to me about, is   
   it?"   
      
   Mulder knew she was changing the subject deliberately, but he was   
   willing to go along for now.  This was too urgent not to talk about,   
   and there was nothing he could do to help her with her patient.  But   
   she might be able to help him.   
      
   "Another young woman has gone missing," he said, "but this time we   
   have something to go on.  She and Monica Bannan swam at the same   
   pool.  And get this: they have the same blood type, and it's a rare   
   type: AB negative."   
      
   "Organ donors," Scully breathed.  It seemed so obvious to her.  "A   
   donor's and a recipient's type has to match."   
      
   Mulder nodded excitedly, all thoughts of anything but the case now   
   out of his mind.  "Black market -- someone filling orders?"   
      
   "That's how they were targeted -- they must be on a donor registry,   
   and someone else using that pool had access to that knowledge."   
      
   "That's your world, Scully.  Your knowledge of that world will save   
   us time, and time's our enemy."   
      
   "You can start with transporters, get the District Attorney's   
   help..." Scully said.   
      
   Mulder shook his head.  "I need you on this, Scully.  You asked me   
   to get involved, now I'm asking you to stay involved."   
      
   She shook her head, and some of Mulder's enthusiasm dimmed.  "You   
   don't need me, Mulder.  They don't even really need you any longer.   
   You broke the case, now let them handle it.  You've done everything   
   you can do."   
      
   "But we're so close now," Mulder insisted.   
      
   "And I'm asking you to let it go," she said gently.   
      
   He couldn't quite believe what he was hearing.  Scully had sometimes   
   been resistant to his enthusiasm for a case in the past, but she'd   
   never asked him to just drop one.  Why now?   
      
   "It's not that simple," he began.   
      
   "No, it's not," she agreed.  "It's complicated."   
      
   "What's that supposed to mean?" Mulder demanded.   
      
   She sighed.  "It's something I knew might happen, but I've been   
   afraid to face it.  Something that I haven't had to face before now,   
   before this case."   
      
   "Just say it, Scully."  He was trying to be patient, but she was   
   killing him.   
      
   She wasn't sure how to say what she was feeling.  There were so many   
   thoughts, so many fears.  How could she make him understand?  "I'm a   
   doctor now, Mulder.  Psychics, severed heads, abducted women: they   
   aren't my life any more."   
      
   "I know that," Mulder started to say, but Scully gave him a look,   
   and he held his peace.  For now.   
      
   "When I was with the FBI, the FBI was my focus.  I used my medical   
   training, yes, but not in the way I'd originally intended.  I don't   
   regret that time, but things are different now.  My work is here now."   
      
   "I'm not asking you to give it up, Scully," Mulder said.   
      
   "You're not hearing what I'm saying, Mulder.  I can't do it any   
   more.  I can't look into the darkness with you.  I can't stand what   
   it does to you...or me."   
      
   "But I'm okay with it, Scully," Mulder said, a little bewildered.   
   "I'm fine with it, really."   
      
   "That's what scares me," she whispered.   
      
   "Where else would you have me look?" he asked, frustrated.   
      
   "I'm asking you to look inside yourself, Mulder."   
      
   "Why?  I'm not the one who's changed," he insisted.  This was   
   beginning to sound like the kind of argument his parents had, and   
   that scared *him*.  He struggled to keep his anger in check.   
      
   Scully still spoke in gentle, measured tones.  "We're not FBI   
   anymore, Mulder.  We are two people who have made a home together.   
   And I don't want that darkness in my home."   
      
   "But it's what I do," Mulder said.  "It's what I did before I ever   
   met you.  It's all I know."   
      
   "Then write it down.  Put it in a book.  You can tell the world   
   now," she said.  "You've paid your debt, whatever you owed, over and   
   over."   
      
   "Are you asking me to quit?" he asked incredulously.   
      
   "No, I could never ask you to do that," she said sadly.  She made   
   herself look at him.  "But what I can tell you is that I won't be   
   coming home.  I have my own battles to fight right now."   
      
   "Scully --"   
      
   "Please don't argue with me," she pleaded.   
      
   "Please don't do this," he replied.  "Not now."   
      
   "I don't know what else to do," she said.   
      
   Mulder reeled with those simple words, and the fight was knocked   
   right out of him.  Scully could be as immovable as a mountain once   
   she'd made up her mind, and all the pushing in the world would get   
   him nowhere.   
      
   Except maybe an even more final declaration.   
      
   Scully was silent as she watched Mulder process what she said.  She   
   hadn't meant it as a threat, but she knew that nothing short of this   
   would keep him from trying to lure her in again.  He couldn't help   
   himself.  He would use all of his considerable persuasive powers on   
   her, and she knew it would be impossible to resist him.  Unless she   
   just stayed away.  She couldn't afford to lose her focus on her   
   patient.   
      
   Mulder rubbed his eyes, finding himself dangerously close to crying.   
   His throat almost closing, he said, "Well.  Good luck, then."   
      
   He got up, and without looking at her again, left the room.   
      
   "You too," Scully whispered, the sighing of the shutting door nearly   
   drowning her words out.   
      
   x-x-x   
      
   Manners General Hospital   
   Fairfax, Virginia   
      
   The two surgeons worked over the open abdominal cavity, snipping and   
   stitching with efficiency but without the sort of delicate care for   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)