From: colbysgurl@shaw.ca   
      
   Authors: Sassy and Jacquie   
      
      
   Category: MSR Romance   
      
      
   Summary: A post episode fic for "Pusher"   
      
   Rating: M   
      
      
      
   .................   
      
      
      
   "Why don't you get as far away from me and as fast, Scully?" Mulder looked   
   her dead in the eye. They showed no emotion. 'Make her leave, Mulder. You   
   don't deserve her trust or her friendship. Make her angry.' "I don't want   
   you here."   
      
   "Tough"   
      
   "Get out. Leave." Mulder got right in Scully's face.   
      
   "No." Her voice was low and calm.   
      
   Having held everything in for so long, Mulder's knees buckled and his face   
   went in his hands as he began to weep. Scully didn't hesitate to wrap him up   
   in her arms in a protective embrace.   
      
   "I'm so sorry," Mulder choked out in angry sobs.   
      
   "Not your fault." Tears were welling up in Scully's own eyes as she gently   
   stroked his hair.   
      
   "I should've fought him harder."   
      
   "It's okay, Mulder," Scully kept soothing him, pushing her own fears into   
   the back of her mind. She was *not* going to show him or tell him how scared   
   she had been.   
      
   Mulder looked up at her. "It's not okay. I could've killed you." He kept   
   seeing that tear slide down her cheek as he held the gun on her.   
      
   "But you didn't," Scully insisted even as her voice began to break and give   
   her away.   
      
   "I would've killed you. I had no control. The look in your eyes...that hurt   
   look...the same one you have right now..." He pulled away from her. "You   
   have to go. Get as far away from me as you can. Go live your life, Scully.   
   Forget 'Spooky' Mulder and go have a life..." He pulled open his door. "Just   
   go."   
      
   "I can't."   
      
   "Why not?"   
      
   "Because I love you!" She began slamming furniture around. Then she put her   
   head in her hands. 'Nice one', she thought to herself. 'Way to keep control'   
      
   He knelt down in front of her. "Scully..." he said, taking her in his arms.   
   She didn't fight. "The way you looked at me before I went in the hospital.   
   God...I wanted to scream then and there that I loved you..."   
      
   "Then why do you want to push me away?" Scully whispered.   
      
   "Because you deserve better," Mulder whispered back.   
      
   "Don't want better" Scully held tighter to him.   
      
   "Go away with me," Mulder said softly.   
      
   Scully was sure she was dreaming. She slowly lifted her tear-stained face to   
   meet his.   
      
   "We've got weeks of vacation time stacked against us. Go away with me,"   
   Mulder said as he touched Scully's face. Her eyes closed at his touch. Then   
   she felt his lips kissing her tears away.   
      
   "Can we go away forever?" Scully didn't realize she was speaking aloud at   
   first.   
      
   Mulder laid his forehead against hers. "I'd give you the moon if it was in   
   my control. I'd do anything for you."   
      
   Scully's eyes slowly opened and she realized she had uttered her wish aloud.   
   She kissed his forehead. "We definitely could use a break," she said softly.   
      
   "Anywhere you want to go...you pick."   
      
   "Maybe we should sleep on it."   
      
   Scully saw his eyes widen as he thought she was leaving him.   
      
   "Stay here with me."   
      
   "I am," Scully reassured him.   
      
   Mulder smiled. "We're gonna be scrunched up together on my couch...hope you   
   don't mind...I can take the floor."   
      
   "I'll take the floor," Scully volunteered.   
      
   "You will not," Mulder said, tilting her chin up.   
      
   "How about we both sleep on the floor? You have sleeping bags right?"   
      
   "Somewhere."   
      
   "We can have like a slumber party. It'll be fun."   
      
   "Only if we can do our nails and makeup" Mulder teased.   
      
   "No problem." Scully grinned at him even though her heart was thudding   
   against her chest.   
      
   He held out his hand. "What color looks good on me?"   
      
   "Blue. Brings out your eyes," she said, not missing a beat.   
      
   Again she was thinking about how sexy he looked in his dress shirts. She   
   felt her face turning red. She tried to cover it up by arching an eyebrow.   
   Mulder rose on his knees and lightly kissed her lips.   
      
   "You disagree?" she teased slightly.   
      
   "I trust you," Mulder said softly.   
      
   She gently ruffled his air. "Just gonna use your bathroom for a sec. I'll be   
   right back."   
      
   "I'll be here."   
      
   She leaned against the door as it closed behind her. He got up to find the   
   sleeping bags. He opened the door to his "Bedroom". He shook his head.   
      
   Mulder you really need to clean this out," he muttered to himself. He shut   
   the door again. He'd talk her into something else...anything else...He   
   didn't want her seeing that mess.   
   Scully composed herself. She splashed water on her face. Mulder was sitting   
   on the couch when she emerged.   
      
   "Hey."   
      
   "About those sleeping bags..."   
      
   "Yeah?"   
      
   "They're in there." Mulder pointed at the door. "But believe me when I say   
   you don't want to go in there."   
      
   "So what do you pro...?" Scully bit her lip.   
      
   "Either you take the couch...I take the floor, we get a hotel, or there is   
   always." He smiled after a bit," Your place."   
      
   "You want to go to my place?" Scully asked softly.   
      
   "I just want to be anywhere you are...cardboard box...Alaska...need I go   
   on?"   
      
   "Okay" Scully briefly touched Mulder's hand. Mulder slipped his fingers   
   between hers and pulled her down to sit beside him.   
      
   "Nestling on the couch could be fun.   
      
   "Nestling or wrestling?" Scully teased.   
      
   "Which do you prefer?"   
      
   Which do you think?" Scully grinned back at him.   
      
   "Wrestling." Mulder grinned back madly.   
      
   "Think I can't take you?"   
      
   "I don't think it. I know."   
      
   "Come on, Mulder. Give it your best shot."   
      
   Mulder pinned her easily on the couch. "Like that?"   
      
   In her struggle to get free, Scully hit her head on the coffee table. "Ow!"   
      
   Mulder quickly helped her back to the couch. "You okay?"   
      
   "Yeah." Scully rubbed her head ruefully.   
      
   Mulder looked the knot over that was forming on her head. Tears glistened in   
   his eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered.   
      
   "Mulder..." Scully held him to her. "It's just a little bump. It's fine.   
   Just needs some ice."   
      
   Mulder jumped up to get it. He banged his head against the freezer door   
   before placing some ice in a bag and wrapping it in a towel.   
      
   "Mulder..." Scully had seen him bang his head.   
      
   "Hm?"   
      
   Scully sighed, taking Mulder's hand in hers. "It was an accident. Okay?"   
      
   "But you always find these 'accidents' when you're around me."   
      
   "What do you mean?"   
      
   "I'm always putting you in danger...even though I don't mean to."   
      
   "I know you don't mean to."   
      
   "Why do you stay?"   
      
   Scully's tear-filled eyes looked up at Mulder. "Because I can't be without   
   you."   
      
   "I've been without you, Scully...It nearly killed me."   
      
   "I'm not going anywhere."   
      
   "I know that...now."   
      
   Scully winced at the cold of the icepack. She sat down at the kitchen table   
   with Mulder across from her.   
      
   "Again, I'm sorry."   
      
   "Honest. It's okay."   
      
   Mulder took her free hand. "We don't have to wrestle anymore."   
      
   "Well...not right now, anyway." Scully grinned at him.   
      
   He winked at her. "That, my dear Dana, is not wrestling."   
      
   "Maybe we should just agree that if we do wrestle again, there shouldn't be   
   any furniture around." Scully put the ice pack down on the table and   
   tentatively touched her head. She was relieved to find the bump was going   
   down.   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)