From: dana_scully_mulders_protege@hotmail.com   
      
   See Chapter One for summary etc.   
      
      
      
      
   Chapter Two   
      
      
      
   "Mulder."   
      
   I raise my head upon hearing a whispering voice. I decipher that the   
   voice is female and familiar. And so I answer with the one name that   
   instantly comes to my mind. "Scully?" I peer out into the darkness   
   as I wipe the tears off my face. Is she here? Has she somehow found   
   me? I then shake my head. No, no this can't be real. It's just my   
   mind playing tricks. It's official now, I have completely gone   
   insane. Add that to my list of loser qualities. I then hear the   
   voice again.   
      
   "Mulder."   
      
   I slowly rise to my feet from the floor.  I find myself shaking as I   
   try and steady myself.  I can't decide if I'm trembling out of fear   
   or anticipation. Gibson told me there was no one else here and no   
   one else knows where I am. So who else could it possibly   
   be? "Scully?" I feel something compelling me to go outside. Do I   
   dare? Gibson says we are safe here right? I just have to know if   
   it's her. I wouldn't be able to rest until I knew for sure anyway. I   
   slowly make my way toward the back trying to be as quiet as   
   possible. I then see the ladder leading to the door at the top.  I   
   climb up the ladder and push up on the door.   
      
   My ears take in the sound of crickets as I make my way out and into   
   the night air. My eyes look up into the sky where I see the most   
   stars I have ever seen.  The entire area is literally covered in   
   them.  I think I can see one blinking almost winking at me but   
   surely that's just my mind playing tricks? I gaze out into the night   
   and see nothing but desert.  I feel a slight breeze tickle the back   
   of my neck as I once again hear the voice.   
      
   "Mulder."   
      
   It's then that I see the source of the voice appear in front of me.   
   It sadly is one of the victims from my quest.  And one that I have   
   never been able to forgive myself for causing her so much pain. It   
   wasn't fair that she was taken away from her. I even see now how   
   much she resembles the one I am pining for. "Melissa?" I whisper.   
      
   She crosses her arms over the long white gown that she wears. And   
   her head is crowned with a garland of flowers, which reflect off her   
   auburn hair. She literally looks like a goddess. "Hello, Mulder."   
      
   I stare back at her dumbfounded after all this woman is dead. "What…   
   what are you doing here?"   
      
   "I've come to help you."   
      
   "Help…help me?" I ask pointing to myself. "How?"   
      
   "I know you are questioning things. Believing you are responsible   
   for the death of others and me. Wondering if you made the right   
   choice to leave Dana and William. All of these feelings: anger,   
   guilt, doubt they are negative energies around you, Mulder. They   
   prevent you from moving forward and thinking clearly.  In order to   
   free yourself of them, you must let go."   
      
   "But I was responsible for killing you, Melissa! You died because of   
   a stupid quest I've been pursuing!"   
      
   Melissa shakes her head. "No, Mulder you weren't responsible. Unless   
   you actually pulled the trigger of the gun that shot me, you   
   didn't.  And did you send the men there to kill me?"   
      
   I shake my head.   
      
   "Then you were not responsible. And I know you blame yourself for   
   your father's death as well as your informers but that isn't true.   
   Each one chose the path that they were on.  They knew the risks   
   involved. They did it because they felt what they were doing was   
   right.  They were here for that time to achieve their goal in this   
   life. They each had a life lesson to learn.  And once that lesson   
   was achieved, they left."   
      
   I stand there in complete awe of what has just been told to me.   
   Could this be true? I remember that one time Scully and I had that   
   talk after I came back from England. She told me about what Colleen   
   had told her. About how all things happened for a reason.  And now   
   here is her sister verifying that same statement. Is it really   
   true? "But….what about me?" I ask looking back at her. "I caused so   
   much pain to those people."   
      
   Melissa comes forward and places a hand on my shoulder. "No, you   
   didn't. You gave them more of a reason to believe. You gave them   
   that…extra push they needed to achieve that goal. Sometimes in our   
   lives we need someone to do that for us. You were that person for   
   them."   
      
   I nod my head slowly. I think I am beginning to understand just what   
   she is talking about now. I never forced my father or Deep Throat or   
   X to do anything for me. It was all their choice. It makes sense   
   now. But there is still one thing that doesn't fit to me. "But….what   
   about you? I mean….you never needed me to help you do that. You   
   never needed me to get you to believe anything."   
      
   "That's true, you didn't. However I was the one who needed you to   
   believe. I was the one who showed you that killing the men   
   responsible for Dana's condition in the hospital was not the   
   solution. That the best solution was to go to her bed side and pray   
   for her.  Had you not done that, Dana surely would have died but…"   
      
   "She had the strength of my beliefs." I whisper.   
      
   "That's right. And it's your beliefs that have helped her through   
   these years. I know you secretly believe that your beliefs are   
   responsible for her being put in danger but you are wrong. Dana made   
   her own choice, Mulder you didn't make it for her. If she had wanted   
   to step away she would have.  But you have done so much for her. You   
   gave her the one thing that she thought she could never have."   
      
   "And now I've abandoned her."   
      
   "No, you haven't.  You left in order to keep her and William safe.   
   That's a brave and unselfish thing to do, Mulder."   
      
   "But this quest of mine…"   
      
   "This quest that you believe is senseless isn't, Mulder. The   
   information that you will find will be what will determine the fate   
   of this planet. You have to let the people know what is happening.   
   That is your purpose in this life as is Dana's. It is the two of you   
   who will determine the fate of the human race."   
      
   "But I'm here alone!" I snap. "I…I didn't have a chance to tell her   
   how I feel. I…"   
      
   "You still can."   
      
   I give her a puzzled look. "I…I can?"   
      
   Melissa nods. "All you have to do is let go of all of these negative   
   feelings within you."   
      
   "I don't understand."   
      
   "I told you your feelings of guilt and anger were holding you back.   
   That you needed to let go. You can see Dana if you allow that to   
   happen."   
      
   "But…she's so far away."   
      
   "No." Melissa places her hand on my chest. "She is right here. And   
   as long as she is there, she is always close to you."   
      
   "But…how can I see her and speak to her?"   
      
   "Sit down and close your eyes and I shall show you."   
      
   Normally I would question such a request. But this is Scully's   
   sister. Why would she have come here to help me if she wasn't   
   sincere? And so far everything she has said is true. And I would do   
   anything to be able to see Scully again.  I sit down on the ground   
   and cross my legs before closing my eyes.   
      
   "The way to see Dana is not in the physical world but rather on the   
   astral.  There are other ways in which to see someone we hold dear.   
   As long as they are in your heart, there is always a way to them.   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)