(Headers in Part 1)   
      
   Glacier Motel   
   Mulder's Room Tuesday, 10:27 AM   
      
   They met up in his room an hour later. It gave them   
   both enough time to shower, change and for Mulder to   
   do a bagel and coffee run. Breakfast was fairly quiet.   
   Even though it was mid-morning, the hush that had   
   surrounded them all night long stayed with them.   
      
   "I didn't like it outdoors much," Mulder said   
   suddenly, sipping his coffee thoughtfully.   
      
   "You didn't like what?"   
      
   "Making love. Having sex, really."   
      
   She gave him a quick glance over her own coffee cup.   
   "Really?" she said, in a noncommittal manner, hoping   
   he'd drop this bizarre subject.   
      
   "Well, the sex was quick and dangerous and I was young   
   so that was all good, but it was just something to   
   talk about later. Kind of like skydiving or any other   
   extreme sport. Something to tell your grandkids."   
      
   "You will be a very strange grandfather if you tell   
   the kids about that."   
      
   He laughed. "I think that would be a given, even   
   without the sex stories. I just meant, you don't   
   remember the feelings or even the woman all that much.   
   You're too busy concentrating on whether someone is   
   whipping around the corner at that moment and will see   
   your ass in the air."   
      
   Scully nodded with her lips pursed tightly. The   
   subject matter was not making her comfortable but she   
   wanted him to feel free to talk to her about anything.   
   This definitely qualified.   
      
   "Did you feel comfortable in a car?"   
      
   "I'm not exactly comfortable now. I don't want to talk   
   about weird sexual encounters. I mean, what's the   
   point?"   
      
   "There is no point. It's just conversation."   
      
   She stood up and tossed the remnants of her breakfast   
   in his trashcan. "Well, maybe we'll continue this   
   conversation at a later date. Right now, I think I'd   
   like to catch up on some sleep."   
      
   She went over to the door, reached for the knob and   
   felt his hand come down over hers.   
      
   "No."   
      
   "No?"   
      
   "Don't go," he said, wrapping his arms around her   
   again. It was different than the batting practice the   
   other day, when his arms were confident and secure.   
   She could feel his uncertainty in the ginger way he   
   was holding her, in the way he was barely breathing.   
      
   "Mulder, this is . . ."   
      
   "This is what? It's you and me completely alone. As we   
   always are, in some ways. But it's also different.   
   It's quiet and relaxed and I just can't do this   
   anymore, Scully. I can't go back into the back into   
   the battle-pretending that one man and one woman can   
   make a difference when half the time, the biggest   
   battle is with myself--keeping my feelings for you in   
   check. It's a battle I no longer want to win."   
      
   His arms tightened around her a bit and he dipped his   
   head to her shoulder. He placed a small, tentative   
   kiss on the top of her sweater and then nuzzled closer   
   to the neckline. He placed another extremely gentle   
   kiss on her neck. She felt herself shiver all the way   
   down to her toes.   
      
   "This is what I wanted to do on Saturday," he   
   whispered, kissing her again, a little more boldly.   
      
   "Why didn't you?" she heard herself say over the sound   
   of the beating of her heart.   
      
   "It seemed too big a step to take. I didn't want you   
   to run off."   
      
   "I wouldn't have. Maybe I would. I don't know."   
      
   "You would have." He was right. Mulder took her by   
   surprise that evening and all the hopes for more were   
   written into the scenario after the moment had passed.   
   If he had made his move then, she would have run for   
   the hills because it wouldn't have been in keeping   
   with the person she expected him to be.   
      
   "Are you running now?" he asked her, grazing his face   
   against the shoulder of her sweater.   
      
   It was put up or shut up time. If she really wanted   
   him to change their relationship, she had to show she   
   was willing. She took her hand off the door and used   
   it to guide Mulder's head closer to her neck. This   
   time, he abandoned his hesitation and applied a full,   
   open-mouthed kiss to her skin. He let out a low moan   
   that almost made her knees buckle.   
      
   "Can we move away from the door?" he asked and she   
   nodded in response.   
      
   He unwrapped his arms and stepped away from her. She   
   could run, if she wanted to. She was still facing the   
   door and she would never have to see his face. If   
   there was a mark on her skin, she could cover it up   
   and they'd never discuss it or the momentary insanity   
   that caused it. That much she knew about both of them.   
   But he was right. You choose your battles and this one   
   was over a long time ago. Perhaps it was one that   
   never should have been undertaken to begin with.   
      
   She turned to him and he smiled.   
      
   He took her hand in his and lifted it to his lips,   
   turning it palm side up before placing a kiss in the   
   center. Who was she kidding? A new battle had just   
   begun. One with herself to keep from quivering to   
   death while she held her emotions in check long enough   
   for him to actually do something that merited actual   
   quivering. It had just been such a long, long wait   
   that her body was jumping the gun a bit.   
      
   "Say something, Scully."   
      
   "What else did you want to do on Saturday?"   
      
   He put his hands on her shoulders and drew her into   
   his arms. He bent his knees a bit and she met him more   
   than halfway by standing on her toes. Their lips   
   touched in a soft, sweet caress. Then another, and   
   then there was nothing gentle about their kissing.   
   Scully was straining all her muscles to reach as much   
   of him as she possibly could while realizing all that   
   stooping couldn't possibly be good for his back.   
      
   She pushed him a little and he walked backwards until   
   he hit his bed and then toppled them both over on it.   
   Scully adjusted herself over him so she wouldn't be   
   elbowing or kneeing him in painful areas and then   
   resumed kissing his sweet mouth. This time, she pushed   
   aside the quivers and ignored the rapid and audible   
   breathing. She just wanted more.   
      
   And so did he. They touched and then tugged off   
   clothing in a fairly sloppy manner and weren't even   
   fully undressed when he reversed their positions and   
   pushed her on her back. They both had their underwear   
   on and Mulder was wearing one sock. He held both her   
   hands out by the sides of her head and kissed her   
   slowly and deeply.   
      
   "We were going too fast," he murmured against her ear.   
      
   "I didn't think you minded."   
      
   "I didn't. I don't. But we should slow down a bit."   
      
   She ran her hands through his hair. He closed his eyes   
   as she slid her fingers through the soft strands. She   
   then trailed her hands down his neck, across his back   
   and to his behind. She slipped her fingers under the   
   waistband of his boxers and started to slide them off,   
   gliding her hands across his buttocks as the material   
   made its way down. He lifted himself up a bit and let   
   her guide them to his thighs, then he reached down and   
   pulled them off-laughing as he found the single sock   
   and removed that as well. He lay down beside her and   
   she reached over and touched him. She used one finger   
   to gently outline the length and then used her entire   
   hand to give him a tentative stroke or two before he   
   stopped her.   
      
   He pulled her up to a sitting position and unfastened   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)