From: msk1024@yahoo.com   
      
   Email: ckelll@hotmail.com   
          msk1024@yahoo.com   
   Category:  Casefile   
   Spoilers: Conduit, En Ami   
   Rating: R   
   Archive:  Just ask.   
   Disclaimer:  Not ours.  Sigh.   
   Summary:  A missing child and a family   
   with something to hide.  In the aftermath   
   of "En Ami," Mulder and Scully investigate   
   a "classic alien abduction."   
   Comments: Writers know what they wanted to   
   say, and that makes it hard for them to see   
   when they haven't succeeded in saying it.   
   That's where betas come in.  "Out of the   
   Everywhere" is stronger and clearer because   
   of the efforts of our betas.  Thank you to   
   Marasmus, Syntax6, MaybeAmanda, Sdani and Linda.   
      
   Out of the Everywhere - part 11   
      
   Mulder stayed in her room for what was left of the   
   night.  If Scully had tried to throw him out, she   
   would have been in for another fight.  She was lucky   
   he let her go to the bathroom by herself.   
      
   She slept in his arms, accepting the protection he   
   needed to give.  She slept, but he did not.   
      
   Mulder couldn't sleep because he had work to do.   
   He had to come to grips with what the smoking man   
   had done to her.  He had to reconcile the Scully he   
   thought he knew with the maverick who ditched him   
   on a whim.  She didn't sound like a maverick when she   
   explained it; she sounded like an accountant.   
      
   She talked about risks and benefits, about   
   entering into a possible trap for a potential   
   gain of inestimable value.  She sounded very   
   rational, very Scully.   
      
   That was a relief, because her desperate stunt had   
   made him wonder if he really knew her at all.  Logic,   
   forethought and caution were her holy trinity.  Was   
   he wrong?  Had she changed?  Had he changed her?   
      
   It felt better to know that before ditching him and   
   flouting her beloved FBI regulations, she had run the   
   numbers.   
      
   And she didn't regret it.  If he was waiting for her   
   contrition, he would wait for a very long time, she   
   had told him.  She'd had about enough of his   
   freeze-treatment, and if he couldn't find a way to   
   get over it...well, that just wasn't an option.   
      
   He knew he'd been aloof, but not because he wanted her   
   to repent and beg his forgiveness.  All he really   
   wanted was her promise that she would never, ever do   
   anything like that again.  Instead he got her cool   
   assurance that she would do it again, given the right   
   circumstances, plus an ultimatum.   
      
   He had to get past it, she said, as if he didn't know   
   that himself.  It couldn't be undone and he couldn't   
   let her go, so there he was.  Get over it.   
      
   He had to get over "it," even when "it" included   
   Scully drugged and helpless as Cancer Man took off her   
   clothes, and then dressed her in pajamas, to make sure   
   she knew about it.  To make sure Mulder would also   
   know about it.   
      
   With an armful of pliant, warm Scully, it was hard to   
   conjure up the anger that had burned within him of late.   
   All his anger was for the smoking man.  If that bastard   
   ever crossed his path, Mulder would beat him to a bloody   
   pulp and make an afternoon out of watching him die.   
      
   His knuckles throbbed.  Damn good thing this motel   
   was built like a boomtown condo or he would have   
   fractured something.   
      
   There was no evidence that the smoking man had   
   tampered with Scully's implant or abused her in   
   any other way.  He had drugged her and stripped   
   her--for what?  If that bastard's goal was to drive   
   them apart, Mulder had played right into his hands.   
      
   If he hadn't been so selfish and angry, Scully might   
   have been able to tell him what had happened.  His biggest   
   complaint in their relationship had been the barriers   
   Scully built around herself.  It killed him to know he   
   was the cause of a whole new set of reinforcements.   
      
   Never again, Mulder promised himself.  He and Scully   
   might argue at times, even rage at one another, but   
   never again would he shut her out.   
      
   Scully sighed and turned onto her side, and Mulder   
   turned with her, spooning against her back.  Sleep   
   would be good, but this was good too.   
      
   *****************X*******************   
      
   Scully woke up, stretching like a cat beside   
   him.  If she noticed the raging woody pressing   
   into her side, she said nothing.   
      
   Mulder stroked her arm, the flesh warm from   
   sleep.  She turned to face him, brushing his   
   hair away from his forehead.   
      
   "I felt like such an ass," Scully said quietly.   
   "So ashamed."   
      
   "That's how he wanted you to feel.  He's the only   
   one who did anything shameful, Scully.  You have   
   to remember that."   
      
   "How could I be so fucking stupid?  Your words,   
   Mulder."   
      
   "A calculated risk.  Your words, Scully."   
      
   The eye contact was lost, with Scully rolling   
   onto her back.   
      
   "I let him set me up.  Like wearing a short skirt   
   into a waterfront bar when the fleet is in."   
      
   Mulder propped himself up on one elbow, resting   
   a hand on her flat stomach.   
      
   "A calculated risk.  You were risking your life, and   
   my sanity.  I don't think the strip show was part of   
   your calculation."   
      
   "God, no."   
      
   "We knew he was a bastard and a murderer.  He gave   
   us any indication he was also a sick fuck."   
      
   "I was afraid you'd think I was asking for it.  I got   
   what I deserved."   
      
   "I would never think that.  It doesn't make any   
   sense,"  he said.   
      
   Finally she turned her face toward him, looking deep   
   in his eyes as she spoke.   
      
   "I'll never forget how it felt to wake up with my   
   clothes gone.  Knowing I'd been unconscious and naked,   
   and wondering what the hell he'd done to me.  I felt   
   angry and frightened but most of all humiliated, and   
   that's the feeling that won't go away."   
      
   She was telling him what she'd needed to say two weeks   
   ago, when he wouldn't listen.  He pulled her closer,   
   hugging her to his chest.   
      
   "You told me last night that I had to get past the   
   anger.  Scully, you have to find a way to get past   
   the humiliation."   
      
   She nodded.   
      
   "That pitiful, lonely old man with his lungs full of   
   tar.  He tried to seduce you with sleeping pills and   
   lies because that's all he has.  He thought he could   
   wedge us apart with anger and humiliation, but he   
   can't.  Let him keep his anger and his humiliation   
   because we don't want them."   
      
   "Oh, Mulder.  I wish it was that easy."   
      
   *********************X*********************   
      
   They ate in the motel's coffee shop.   
      
   Scully, who always took her toast dry, asked for   
   butter on the side.  Mulder returned the favor by   
   ordering bacon instead of sausage.  Scully wouldn't   
   touch sausages but she sometimes helped herself to a   
   strip of bacon.   
      
   Once the coffee was served, it was back to business.   
      
   "You're worried about Kevin, but I dread having to   
   face Darlene," Scully said.   
      
   "Kevin still believes we can help them," Mulder said.   
      
   "While Darlene knows we're nothing but trouble."   
      
   "We have to start over, as if we were first opening   
   the case.  They're all going to hate us," Mulder said.   
      
   Scully's shoulder's slumped.  Her phone rang and she   
   sighed before she answered.   
      
   Mulder sipped his coffee as he listened to Scully's   
   half of the conversation.   
      
   "Darlene," she explained when she ended the call.   
   "The sheriff came by this morning."   
      
   "He gave us two days," Mulder reminded her.   
      
   "He obviously counted Thursday as 'day one'."   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)