From: gilliandavidlover@yahoo.com   
      
   TITLE: Ideas of a Drunken Mind   
      
   AUTHOR: Glover   
      
   E-MAIL: gilliandavidlover@yahoo.com   
      
   RATING: NC-17   
      
   CATEGORY: established MSR   
      
   SPOILERS: None that I know of.   
      
   DISCLAIMER: They aren't mine, never have been, never will   
   be.  I just brought them out to play at Belle and my Momic's   
   birthday party.   
      
   SUMMARY: Just a little clowning around...   
      
   SPECIAL THANKS: Thanks to Aud for the beta. You rock, MamaAud.   
   Also to Ash for a few ideas, keeping me on track, and helping   
   with my "blocks".   
      
   DEDICATION: This goes out to Momic and Belle for their berfdaes.   
   Hope you all likey *g*   
      
   ARCHIVE: I'm going to attempt Gossamer and Ephemeral myself...   
   Anywhere else, I'd be honored, but please let me know so I can   
   visit and give thanks.   
      
   ******   
      
   "I can't believe we're going undercover again – and at a   
   carnival of all places!" Scully says as she pours my next shot.   
      
   We're not drinkers-ever.   We've just had a rough week.  Well,   
   who am I kidding? We always have rough weeks. This time   
   we're just going to wind down from it a bit.   
      
   Whoo-boy. You can tell we're not drinkers.  We're both on our   
   fourth shot. I'm feeling very warm and she's just this side of   
   being three sheets to the wind.  When we started, she was fairly   
   pissed off about this assignment…now she's laughing about it.   
      
   "Well, since we have to do it, we might as well make the best of   
   it." I reply to her with a shrug, a little delayed due to   
   concentrating on not spilling the rum.   
      
   "You know what we should do? You know, just to make it fun."   
   She looks at me and grins as I tilt my head back and pour liquid   
   fire down my throat.   
      
   "What's that?" I ask with a cough after I swallow – that one   
   didn't go down as smoothly.   
      
   "We should pick each other's outfits, decide what the other one   
   is going to be."  She's still grinning. Oh, my God! She's   
   serious. Oh, Scully.  You have no idea the depth of the hole you   
   just dug for yourself.   
      
   I chuckle and kiss her smiling lips with my own.   
      
   *****   
      
   I wake up and Mulder is gone.  I get up and make my way to the   
   coffeepot, flip the switch for it to brew and then venture to the   
   bathroom to find some aspirin – this day is not going to be   
   pretty if I don't take some soon.  I down three with a full glass   
   of water and make my way back to the kitchen to pour myself a   
   cup of coffee, grabbing my cell phone from the counter while I'm   
   there.  I hit Mulder's number on my speed dial and hear a faint   
   ringing coming from the hallway outside my door. I press the   
   end button on my phone just before I hear a key click in the   
   door.   
      
   "Good morning, sunshine!" he chirps with a grin as he comes in   
   the door.   
      
   I groan.   
      
   He's very chipper considering how much we drank last night.   
   Apparently he remembered to drink some water before he went   
   to sleep.   
      
   "Why so glum, Scully? Today is a good day!"   
      
   I respond by raising an eyebrow and nodding at the   
   bag he's carrying.   
      
   "Oh, this? Well, since we decided last night that we were going   
   to pick each other's assignment for this case, I thought I'd get a   
   jump start and pick up outfit this morning."   
      
   My eyes immediately shoot up to his, and he snorts as my face   
   falls.   
      
   Now I remember why I don't drink rum. Rum is bad. Rum is   
   not my friend. I get really stupid ideas when I drink rum – and   
   this one may top the list.   
      
   "I have decided that you, my love, are going to be…a   
   magician's assistant!" he says as he pulls my "costume" out of   
   the bag he's carrying.  My outfit, which consists of a little red   
   sequined mini-skirt and a matching shirt, which is not much   
   more than a bra, glitters in the sunlight that's streaming through   
   the windows as I stare at him in shock.   
      
   "Are you kidding me?" I gape at him.   
      
   "Nope. Think about it, Scully. If this guy is targeting kids, what   
   better place to be than on a magician's stage?"  He says it more   
   like a statement, rather than a question. He's clearly proud of   
   himself. "With this outfit, you'll fit right in."   
      
   "Mulder, I understand the importance of this assignment, but I   
   refuse to wear that."   
      
   Ha. That's that. I turn and walk back into the kitchen to make   
   myself another cup of coffee.  Little do I know, he follows me.   
   He comes up behind me and places his hands on my waist and   
   leans down to whisper in my ear.   
      
   "You'll wear it, and you'll like it." He says before licking my   
   earlobe. "Betcha I will too…" His voice trails off as he nudges a   
   particularly hard part of his anatomy against my ass.   
      
   Maybe I will.   
      
   *****   
      
   I walk past the stage for the third time, and Scully still hasn't   
   come out yet. There's  been no action as far as our perp is   
   concerned, and I'm itching to see her in this outfit.  She   
   wouldn't put it on at the apartment for me.  Maybe I'm just   
   itching in my own outfit.  Leave it to Scully to get the perfect   
   revenge.   
      
   I, Fox Mulder, am stuck running around this carnival in a clown   
   suit.   
      
   I'll never forget the look on her face when she shoved this thing   
   in my face and repeated my own words back to me.   
      
   "Think about it, Mulder. If this guy is targeting kids, what better   
   place to be than in a clown's suit?"   
      
   So here I am, big red nose and all, standing and listening to the   
   crowd `ooh' and `ahh' at this magician who is famous for his   
   fire tricks. Wait…listening to the crowd `ooh' and `ahh'?   
      
   I stop daydreaming and realize that the show has begun.   
   Scully's standing out on the stage, she's doing what's being   
   asked of her, and she looks amazing while she's doing it.   
      
   I'm pretty sure the crowd is oohing and ahhing at the magician,   
   but Mr. Johnson downstairs is doing some oohing and ahhing   
   himself, which means I have to get out of this crowd.   
      
   I take notice that Molotov the Magnificent is about to do   
   Scully's vanishing trick.   
      
   At which point, I get a brilliant idea.   
      
   I make my way through the crowd, and slip in the back door of   
   the secret room that Scully is about to enter.   
      
   Soon, she slips quickly down through the floor of the stage.   
      
   "You're so beautiful." I whisper to her, so she'll know that I'm   
   there and not be startled.   
      
   She spins around with her hand to her chest. She was still   
   startled, but at least she didn't kick the shit out of me.   
      
   I lock the door behind me and push her up against   
   the wall.  I put a hand on either side of her head and nip at her   
   bottom lip.   
      
   "You're so fucking gorgeous." I growl just before I slide my   
   tongue between her lips.  She laughs in the kiss, and I pull back.   
      
   "What's wrong?" I look at her questioningly as she snickers   
   again.   
      
   "I'm sorry. It's just funny to me. I'm making out with a   
   clown…" She snorts again, and I drop to my knees on the floor   
   in front of her. I lean forward to kiss her stomach, but am   
   quickly stopped by my big, red schnozz.  I yank it off   
   impatiently and return to my oh-so yummy task.   
      
   I lift up her little skirt and place an open-mouthed kiss on the   
   front of her panties.   
      
   "Mulder, no. We don't have time for that!" She argues with me   
   as I try to wrestle her panties down her legs. She's squeezing   
   her thighs together so that I can't get them down.   
      
   "C'mon, Scully. I promise to make you come fast…" I give her   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)