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   alt.tv.xena      Hilarious medival chick show      5,700 messages   

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   Message 4,275 of 5,700   
   David E. Milligan to All   
   4-19 Takes One To Know One -- A Critique   
   16 Dec 07 15:53:52   
   
   From: davideml@bellsouth.net   
      
   4-19    Takes One To Know One   
      
      
      
   First airing was on April 26, 1999.   
      
   The story starts out on a dark and stormy night. Xena rides into a town, then   
   goes into a darkened   
   room (of a tavern). She hears a noise, pulls her sword and grabs someone. It's   
   Joxer. Then Cyrene,   
   Lila, and Minya come out. It is a surprise birthday party for Gabrielle. Xena   
   says her birthday   
   isn't until tomorrow. Joxer says that's the surprise. Xena then pulls back the   
   hood of someone   
   sitting at a table, it's Autolycus. At another table is a blond woman who   
   doesn't look too happy.   
   They are in Cyrene's tavern in Amphipolis.   
      
   Cyrene and Xena go upstairs for the night. Later Xena gets up to close the   
   shutters as the storm   
   worsens. She sees a woman going somewhere in the storm. She hears a noise and   
   goes to Cyrene's room   
   to check on her. Cyrene isn't there.   
      
   Xena breaks down the door of the blond woman and sees her lying dead with a   
   dagger sticking out of   
   her chest. Some half naked man is there and tries to attack Xena. Just as she   
   is about to beat him   
   up, a feisty woman appears and introduces herself as Discord and says Ares has   
   made her the Goddess   
   of Retribution. She gives Xena  until sunrise to find the killer, or she'll   
   take one of Xena's   
   friends.   
      
   Everyone is gathered in the dead woman's room  and they start going through   
   her things to try to   
   find out who she is. They find chains and manacles and wanted posters. Cyrene   
   says she's a bounty   
   hunter. Xena takes Cyrene aside and wants to know if she killed her to protect   
   Xena. She says no.   
      
   Autolycus says her name is Ravenica. They find a wanted poster of Xena   
   offering 200 dinars. Minya   
   says she knows that Ravenica cuts the tendons of the horses of her bounties to   
   slow them down.   
   Joxer accuses Minya of the murder.   
      
   Gabrielle then runs in and says a bounty hunter is after Xena, then sees her   
   on the floor and   
   thinks Xena got to her first. She says she didn't kill Ravenica.   
      
   In the kitchen Autolycus accuses Cyrene of the murder to protect Xena. He then   
   tries to leave but   
   when he opens the door is flung backward into the room. Discord appears with   
   more naked men and   
   starts to shoot Cyrene with a bow and arrow. Xena uses her Chakram to deflect   
   the arrow. Xena   
   reminds her they have until sunrise.   
      
   They find a locked pouch of Ravenica's. When it's opened they find rocks.   
   Gabrielle finds   
   Autolycus' pouch on the kitchen floor with the diamonds. He admits he stole   
   them.   
      
   Xena says there is a bounty scroll missing, and whoever took it repacked   
   Ravenica's saddle bags   
   with the chains on top of the fruit. And someone was wearing lavender perfume,   
   but a bounty hunter   
   would ever so that. Only Lila wears lavender. Joxer defends her. Gabrielle   
   tells Xena she can't   
   suspect Lila but Xena says she suspects everyone.   
      
   Back in Ravenica's room Gabrielle finds a long stick but there is no fireplace   
   or stove, and   
   doesn't know what it means. Xena finds an extra candle on the floor. Autolycus   
   says the door was   
   locked on the inside. Gabrielle checks the window and says no one came in   
   through it.   
      
   Minya confesses the dagger is hers. Xena tells them the knife was a half a   
   hand below Ravenica's   
   heart and it didn't kill her. Gabrielle confesses to killing Ravenica. She   
   says she ran into her   
   two days before and she put Joxer's gravy recipe into her water bag. She must   
   have been allergic to   
   it and it killed her. Discord appears to kill Gabrielle but Xena tells her   
   Ravenica never drank the   
   water, and once again tells her she has until sunrise. Discord makes the sand   
   in a magic hourglass   
   to be halved, and their time is cut in half. She says next time she will take   
   everyone.   
      
   Xena demands straight answers. She then grabs a bit of parchment from Joxer.   
   He says he got a love   
   note with lavender on it from Lila and was writing her a note to let her down.   
   Ravenica grabbed him   
   from behind thinking he was Jett. And then tore the note in half and told him   
   not to get in her   
   way. Joxer says he sneaked into her room and found a bounty scroll on Jett and   
   took it. He  heard   
   her coming and dived out of the window where Argo is in a stall. He says he   
   heard her with   
   Autolycus.   
      
   Autolycus says he knew her and was trying to talk her out of going after Xena.   
   When Xena asks if he   
   did that for him she says he confesses, and Discord reappears with more men.   
   Xena tells her that   
   Ares wouldn't like it if she let the real killer get away, and she disappears   
   again.   
      
   Minya says she and Lila conspired to help Xena. While Minya was pretending to   
   talk to Lila to fool   
   Cyrene, Lila took Minya's knife and was going to free Ravenica's horse, but   
   she found Lila with her   
   horse and took away the knife. Minya went into Ravenica's room with an extra   
   candle pretending to   
   be a man to distract her from Lila, but she was found out, dropped the candle   
   and ran away.   
      
   Discord appears when the sand runs out had has a dozen men with her. They   
   attack. Gabrielle hustles   
   Lila and Cyrene into the kitchen. Xena, Autolycus, Joxer and Minya fight   
   Discord's men. Xena sees   
   the candle chandelier swinging and calls a halt to the fighting. She tells   
   Discord she knows what   
   happened and if she doesn't agree she can take Xena, which will score points   
   with Ares.   
      
   They go into Ravenica's room. She demonstrates that Ravenica leaned out of the   
   window to cut Argos'   
   tendons. But she has an instinct for danger and kicked Ravenica back into the   
   room and the window   
   locked itself.. The knife  hit her in the chest but didn't kill her, but when   
   the swinging   
   chandelier hit her in the head, she fell on her chest and drove the knife in   
   up to its hilt.   
      
   Discord is angry saying she can't take a horse, then disappears.   
      
   Autolycus offers to help Cyrene clean up. They find a diamond or two and he   
   says it isn't his. Xena   
   apologizes to her for suspecting her. Cyrene says any mother who loves her   
   child would kill to   
   protect it.   
      
   While Xena and Gabrielle are talking everyone brings out a birthday cake and   
   sing to her as she   
   blows out the candles.   
      
   ......   
      
   A murder mystery. A dark and stormy whodunit.   
      
   And it wasn't too bad. Although I never did figure out how Xena knew what   
   happened just from seeing   
   the chandelier swinging, and in the middle of a fight, to boot.   
      
   Wasn't too much to complain about, but here are a few observations -   
      
   No explanation why Xena and Gabrielle weren't traveling together.   
      
   Minya is still kicking butt.   
      
   I took me a while, using the pause and the step forward on the final scene,   
   but I thought I counted   
   21 or 22 candles on Gabrielle's cake.   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)   

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