From: pdalby@sympatico.ca   
      
   redbar wrote:   
   > Iraqi Hockey Player   
   >   
   > Toronto head coach sends scouts out around the world looking for a new   
   > centre to hopefully help win the Stanley Cup for Toronto.   
   >   
   > One of his scouts informs him of a young Iraqi centre who he thinks will   
   > turn out to be a true superstar. So, Pat flies to Iraq to watch him play and   
   > is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to the NHL.   
   >   
   > Two weeks later, Toronto is down 4-0 at home against Montreal with only 8   
   > minutes left. Pat gives the young Iraqi centre the nod to go on, and he puts   
   > him on in place of Sundin.   
   >   
   > The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 8 minutes and wins the game for   
   > Toronto. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and   
   > the media love the new star.   
   >   
   > When he comes off the ice, he phones his Mum to tell her about his first day   
   > in the NHL. "Hi Mum, guess what?" he says. "I played for 8 minutes today, we   
   > were down 4-0 but I scored 5 goals and we won. Everybody loves me; the fans,   
   > the players and the media, they all love me".   
   >   
   > "Great," says his Mum, "let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot   
   > in the street, your sister and I were raped and beaten and your brother has   
   > joined a gang of looters, while you were having a great time".   
   >   
   > The young lad is very upset. "What can I say, Mum, I'm so sorry".   
   >   
   > Sorry!" says his Mum, "It's your damned fault that we moved to Toronto in   
   > the first place!"   
   >   
   >   
   Reminds me of the one about the two boys who are playing hockey on a   
   pond in a park in Toronto, when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler.   
   Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick, wedges it down the   
   dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who was   
   strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy.   
       "Young Leafs Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts   
   writing in his notebook. "But I'm not a Leafs fan," the little hero   
   replied. "Sorry, since we are in Toronto, I just assumed you were." said   
   the reporter and starts again. Little Jays Fan Rescues Friend From   
   Horrific Attack" he continued writing in his notebook. "I'm not a Jays   
   fan either," the boy said. "I assumed everyone in Toronto was either a   
   Leafs or Jays fan. What team, do you root for?" the reporter asked.   
   "I'm a Montreal Canadiens fan." the child said.   
       The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Little   
   French Bastard Kills Beloved Family Pet." :):)   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)