-=> Quoting Gary Perkins to Nancy Backus on 06-06-11  17:30 <=-

 GP> Yeah, you're right about growing out of it.  Just seems like he's a
 GP> little behind on some things.

Not that it makes things all that much better, but every kid has his or
her own schedule for learning things... 

 GP> He's finally starting to get better about the hair.  I was able to get
 GP> him to trust me to lay him back in the water and not get water in his
 GP> face.  He still bitches now and then.  Now that we're starting to get

Well, at least that's progress... :)

 GP> past the bath troubles, everything else is going to hell...lol... he's
 GP> getting very hyper and defiant on everything else, seems like.  sigh...

Some kids just do everything the hard way...  Best advice I ever got was
to learn how to pick your battles... some things really don't matter if
the kid gets his own way, so just let those be.  Save the struggles for
the bigger things that matter.  And sometimes what works best is a big
hug...  ;)

 GP> Yep..  Both my kids break all the rules every day.  Then bitch at me
 GP> when they get punished for it.  I had a little talk with my 7 year old
 GP> a few minutes ago; in about thirty seconds I named off 7 major rules
 GP> right off the top of my head that she breaks every day...and I'm like,
 GP> come on now. *Every* day.  All day.  Climbing on the back of the couch,
 GP> climbing on the dresser, playing around in the kitchen, grabbing junk
 GP> food in the middle of the night/early morning, letting the cats in,
 GP> playing in the bathroom, hitting/pushing/pinching/bullying her brother
 GP> (more than is normal)... This is every day, several times throughout
 GP> the day. 

Hmm... Like cats, children can't focus on the big picture, usually... 
You bring it all up at once, and all they get is that you are upset with
them...   It isn't easy, but one really does have to deal with each
thing individually...  And, like I just said, sometimes it just needs a
big hug/time out to break the cycle...  Sometimes, hard as it is for us
to accept it, they really don't realize what the source of our
frustration is...  I remember once, when I was helping my sister after
she'd had yet another baby, dealing with her 4-year-old who still was
pooping in his underpants...  I was sitting on the bathroom floor, in
front of the toilet, having just taken off the poopy training pants and
dumping the contents, prior to the requisite rinsing... I, with great
frustration, said to the kid, "Do you think I LIKE having to keep
cleaning out your poopy pants?"  He said, "Yes...?"  I restrained myself
from strangling him, and merely said, "No"... and supervised HIS rinsing
them out in the toilet.  That made more impression on him than all of
his mom's yelling at him...  When he experienced the inconvenience of
his doing it in his pants instead of the toilet for himself, it brought
it home much quicker...

 GP> The most exhausting part is that I have to repeat commands four or
 GP> five times...she's like "But, it's just..."  I have to keep reminding
 GP> her that "just" doesn't make something right...lol.  I'm still trying
 GP> to remember to use counting.  Oftentimes, I'm just so dumbfounded, I'm
 GP> like "Get off. Get off!  Get OFF!  GET OFF!!!" :p

Yeah... getting her attention is the first thing... then keeping it,
then getting her to change the wrong behaviour...  They drive us to
distraction...!  But eventually they do grow up... and learn to be
decent adults, hopefully...  ;)  (My kid is 37 now... and not too bad,
if I do say so myself...)

ttyl       neb

... Bad Dog! Don't chew on the power cor%$#^&* ...NO TERRIER

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