-=> Quoting Damon A. Getsman to Nancy Backus on 05-Feb-2015 18:14 <=-

 NB>> It's good you have a roof over your head, but granted, that's still
 NB>> nowhere near an ideal situation...

 DAG> It's much better than hitching it along the pacific shoreline headed
 DAG> for Chile', at least.  ;)

For sure..  
 
 NB>> Have you considered getting him some sort of electronic book reader,
 NB>> and downloading books for him...?  Or is that out of the question
 NB>> financially...?  How far away is the library...?   It's a shame that
 NB>> things are less safe than they were back when I was a kid... I used to
 NB>> hang out at the local library all the time, could walk there from
 NB>> home...

 DAG> Well, for now it's out of the question financially.  We've got a
 DAG> couple of portable electronic devices now that are capable, but too
 DAG> small for easy reading.  I'm not sure where the closest library is,
 DAG> just a few that I've stumbled across.  I'll open a google maps tab for
 DAG> that right now, actually. Yeah, I used to go to one, too.  About a mile
 DAG> away, but I'd stay there for a looooong time.  Plus my dad always took
 DAG> me there to hang out while he was checking out stamp catalogs and value
 DAG> guides.  Heh. I'll look into finding a cheap 400MHz android ripoff
 DAG> tablet or something, though.  I didn't think about that because I hate
 DAG> electronic format books so much, but I don't think he'll hate it at
 DAG> all.  They're amazingly cost effective, so yeah.  Thank you for the
 DAG> awesome idea. 

I've not wanted to use the electronic books, either, but I've seen
several people using them, including some of my family (sisters,
nieces), and they seem to think they are a good idea... :)  I just
figured that a kid that's into video games AND reading might find them
an easier transition away from the games...  :)

 DAG> I've got a lot of theories on the whole thing, personally, and so
 DAG> does my roommate.  One of the worst horror stories I've heard about it,
 DAG> though, was a father who realized that his daughter had hit 16 years
 DAG> old and, at tops, had had like 75 minutes unscheduled time before. 
 DAG> What kind of pressure cooker are we putting kids like that into?  How
 DAG> are they going to know how to socialize? It just seems like an inhumane
 DAG> way to raise a kid, to me, and if they spend all of their time in
 DAG> structured activities, how the hell are they going to get the practice
 DAG> that they need to be able to deal with what the real world throws at
 DAG> them out on the streets? 

I mostly agree with you, but, that being said, I think there's more
socializing even in the structured activities than you give credit
for...  What's more of an issue is what one does once they are
responsible for setting their own structure instead of having it imposed
on them...  :)

 DAG> Sorry about the one kid thing, if you were hoping to have more. 

Thanks.  We did try, very unsuccessfully, for a long time... it just
wasn't going to happen, and it turned out that having even the one was a
bit of a fluke, or miracle, if you will...  :)

 DAG> I want to have a sibling for my son, other than
 DAG> his half sisters (in Germany), but my life isn't nearly stable enough
 DAG> and I don't have a decent mother candidate in mind.  Heh.  By the time
 DAG> I have all of those things squared away I'm pretty sure I'm only going
 DAG> to be dating post-menopausal women.

If it happens, it happens...  And maybe you'll find some wonderful woman
that has a child or children of her own that you'll both be comfortable
with... ;)

 DAG> You're right, though.  I always hated being an only child.  It was
 DAG> a horror, especially with abusive parents. 

Abusive parents only make it worse, true.  My son at least had cousins,
and my youngest siblings, and a friend from church to be semi-sibs...
and he tended to make friends pretty easily...  :)

 NB>> Keeping him clothed and fed and in school should go a ways in showing
 NB>> that you are a proper father, however...  and the other hopefully will
 NB>> come as you are better stabilized and can find a decent job...  :)

 DAG> Indeed.  I'm just glad I'm out of the phase where I feel I'm looking
 DAG> for the light at the end of the tunnel, and into a phase where I
 DAG> actually am out in the light, or at least close enough to it so that
 DAG> it's not just a dot any more.  :) I'm really well stabilized now, for
 DAG> the most part, and it only gets better; right now I'm more stable than
 DAG> I've been since I started college.  I've been putting out enough code
 DAG> each day to keep my portfolio nice 'n full along with applying for jobs
 DAG> hours every day.  I'm pretty sure with the amount of effort that I'm
 DAG> putting into things that I'll have many fewer unstructured hours in my
 DAG> own day very soon.  ;) 

Hope it works out for you soon...  :)

ttyl          neb

... Life is a collection of low-probability events

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