Re: shinies and sickies  was: camping
  By: Nancy Backus to Damon A. Getsman on Mon Jun 15 2015 15:50:54

 NB> I'm seeing a few different topics in this message, so, in the interests
 NB> of breaking it into more manageable size messages, I'm going to try to
 NB> pull like into like... ;)

  Roger that.

 NB> True, some people are more easily distracted than others... and some
 NB> manage to learn how to minimize it eventually... and then there do seem
 NB> to be some that don't seem to be distracted at all (but I bet they're
 NB> faking it... )

  Hahaha.  Yeah I've noticed how in some people it's become a primary bogus
coping mechanism for things that they don't want to have to deal with.  Just
give in to the shinies...  procrastinate...  watch your life pile up around you
until what would've been unpleasant but manageable become horrifying and
unmanageable.  Used to be my M.O., it's not like I'm just seeing it from
external sources.  Having a kid changed that for me, and I'm glad it did.

 NB> So what did you get him special for his birthday...?

  Well at this point we got pizza ordered in a couple of days, he got a new
video game, and wanted a few more, but I wasn't willing to spend the rest of it
on that.  We had to wait, as he got sick, to start Aikido, which was supposed
to happen yesterday, but there was a mis-scheduling at the dojo or something so
now we're going to have to wait a few more days I guess.
  It's actually going to be a bit more challenging than I thought it would to
make that all go through; sickness time kind of blew up our finances again. 
I'm really not sure that I have enough to get both him and I in it now.  Things
were at the margin where it would've been okay up until the #%*& sink got
clogged here.  It's been standing for awhile and it's not going down without a
plumber, we've tried everything including snaking it to a rather significant
depth.  It's in the kitchen so it interferes with cooking and cleaning pretty
badly, too.  So now I'm having to hold onto that money a little bit longer
because it'll probably have to be emergency plumbing money.
  Either way I did find a backup that I'm going to cash in and try to make
enough to get us both into Aikido together with.  Loki's just been throwing so
much crap at us lately that I'm afraid to spend it lest the next disaster turn
into a fiscal issue again.  Keeping my fingers crossed for aikido this week,
though.  It'd be much needed socialization time for him, time to burn off some
energy (other than what I do with him), and just good time to get out of the
house.
  I wanted to do more, but with all of the troubles it just wasn't possible. 
When I've got the next paycheck in I should be able to make up for things a
little bit, hopefully.

 NB> Sounds to me like some sort of bug, rather than food poisoning...
 NB> especially since I note in later messages that stuff's been going around
 NB> again... ;)  But the sore throat and the fever tend to clinch the bug
 NB> theory... :)

  Turned out to be an influenza strain that hit everybody here.  Soon as that
was gone it caused my son's latent strep (he's a carrier) to come out, then
that hit my roommate as well.  I'm surprised I got lucky with that; strep
usually kicks my butt.  But yeah, it wasn't just some sort of weird food
illness or something; in varying degrees of severity the one-two combo beat us
all down for awhile.  Despite the fact that I wasn't sick with strep like
everyone else, it really became bad enough for them that I wasn't able to
survive outside of the bubble of their illness needs, so I'll just consider us
all beaten down by the whole thing.  :)

 NB> I understand...  :)  And I also understand the kid point of view of not
 NB> wanting to waste SUMMER being sick... ;)

  Oh for sure.  He still gets cranky at me on that basis just when I tell him
it's time for bed.  ;)

 DAG>> considering.  The limitations of the situation that I'm in is going
 DAG>> to make it interesting, to say the least, and I'm definitely at the
 DAG>> phase where I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel a bit.  But yeah,
 NB> I'll be watching for it.  ;)

  Oh they are legion.  I'm still looking for other solutions, as the primary
ideas that I had in play (provided I've remembered the thread correctly) were
the only two that were within a range that he would've been able to get to
himself.  One was the playground at his school, probably the best place to look
for and meet other free range kids (in the pitiful minority due to helicopter
parenting ruling this neighborhood).  The other was at the neighborhood pool,
which unfortunately exists in the same building.  Turns out that they're having
summer rennovation so the entire place, including a vast swath of the
playground, is shut down as a construction zone.  There are other parks around
here but they're too populated by adults and crackheads to let my kid free
range at.  So I'm trying to keep my eyes open.
  Also I picked him up a library card (and myself) yesterday.  I was hoping
that the neighborhood branch would be big enough so that I could go and release
him in a kids section, like my dad used to do to me when I was old enough to
understand and stick to the rules, but alas, it is not.  I'm not going to be
taking trips into the inner city with my vehicle as dire as it is, but maybe we
can afford a bus ride to go hang out at the big one in the inner city once a
week or so once a couple of more paychecks come in to clean up after Loki.

 NB> Somehow it's always easier to see in someone else's situation... ;) 
 NB> They probably have a reasonably good idea what they ought to be doing,
 NB> whether or not they manage to follow through on it with their own
 NB> kids...  :)

  Oh absolutely.  ;)

 NB> And the niggling thoughts that one should maybe be trying to make it up
 NB> to the kid for things not being as one would have hoped... but that sort
 NB> of thing can get you in trouble, too...  :)   Hopefully a better setting
 NB> will indeed help things...  :)

  Oh that's one that hits me hard.  Especially right now when all of the ideas
that I had for summer release for him are blown out of the water.  Not sure
what's going to come of all of it at this point; I don't want to fall back on
an endless parade of new videogames and a tightly caged little man that'll end
up losing massive valuable socialization.

 NB> Even when they protest loudly against the limits, kids actually are
 NB> happier knowing what the limits are and having them be securely
 NB> enforced... it gives a more secure feeling...  If one can enforse them
 NB> simply by words and actions, and not have to resort to consequences, so
 NB> much the better for all...  :)

  This is not the first time that I've heard this.  I certainly do not
disagree.  Unfortunately, things being what they are with the two of us staying
in the living room of a 1 bedroom apartment, I don't have control over his
environment even very well.  I'm still looking for ways to add more reliable
limitations and boundaries on a daily basis here.  A lot of it is going to be
orders of magnitude easier once we relocate, but that's not going to be for [at
least] several months...  So an interim solution does need to be located soon
here.

 NB> Indeed.  :)   Being in pretty good shape can also help you fight off the
 NB> bugs that come piling in...  :)

  I'm counting that when I consider the fact that I didn't come down with this
strep.  ;)  Now I'm just trying to get my little guy back into the shape he was
in before we got here, as well.  He used to be able to BEAT ME on a 2-mile,
despite his short legs.  Now he can barely keep up on a bike.  So every time I
go out, he's coming out.  With a little bit of modification to my routine to
make it better for him, of course.  Definitely some playground time at some of
the places where I do the majority of my miles.  :)

  -D/K
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