Dejv, you should recogzine this.
It's the extended joke you told me in live chat last week, which I've now
translated as you asked (see previous message): Esperanto first, as usual, so
anglaj parolantaj komencantoj povas praktiki unue sen la angla.


PSYCHIATRIC HOTLINE

if you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly if you are co-dependent,
ask someone else to press 2 for you

if you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6

if you are paranoid delusional, we know who you are. we are tracing the call.

if you are schizophrenic, listen to the little voice to tell you which number
to press

if you are manic depressive, it does not matter which number you press. no one
will answer

if you are delusional and occassionaly hallucinate, please be advised that the
thing you are holding up to your ear is about to bite your head off

--- BBBS/Li6 v4.10 Dada-1
 * Origin: Prism bbs (1:261/38)