From: mdhangton@gmail.com   
      
   On Sunday, April 20, 2014 3:33:20 PM UTC-4, J.Pascal wrote:   
   > On Saturday, April 19, 2014 2:18:55 PM UTC-6, William Vetter wrote:   
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   > > Do you think this is lame?  When I wrote it, I thought    
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   > > it was a good lost cat flyer, but now, when I read it, it    
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   > > seems lame.   
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   > > The POV character's wife, as I mentioned above, was a    
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   > > lesbian and left him for her Asian manicurist as a matter    
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   > > of backstory.   
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   > >       This one had a picture of a black cat on it.  It    
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   > > confused me at first, because it began with "My name is    
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   > > John.  I am an alcoholic," but as I read on, it most    
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   > > definitely pled for a lost cat.  "I think I must have found    
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   > > her on the way home from a bar, because I named her Black    
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   > > Haus.  I've tried to call her Abby, but she only comes when    
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   > > I say 'Haus'."  John gave a startling amount of contact    
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   > > information, which included his full name and even a    
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   > > business address at his job.  "Please," it said, "I go to    
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   > > the meetings, but they're not enough.  I can't be alone."   
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   > >       I had to mull over this flyer for a while, but, in the    
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   > > end, it wasn't difficult to understand.  It's hard to live    
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   > > when there's no one to notice you exist.  Marriage had    
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   > > taught me that much.  The print was black & white, but John    
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   > > said that Haus' eyes were yellow in the text.  All of the    
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   > > flyers left me sad, but this one made me feel weak and    
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   > > impotent.  There was little to be done but whisper, "Hello,    
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   > > John."   
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   > I like it.  I know what it's saying.  I'm not confused by any of it.  And   
   the fellow, John, who needs the cat because he's an alcoholic is engaging.   
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   > I can see why you might have decided that it was "lame" but really, you   
   agonize over the passage but a reader doesn't stay there that long.  Don't   
   worry about it.   
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   What I think is that maybe it's melodramatic or cliched.  It seems like all   
   detectives are recovering from something or other these days.   
      
   I got involved with this story a couple months ago...it's the closest thing to   
   literary fiction I've tried to do thus far.  It's a cat story -- the main   
   characters are the POV guy and the feral kitten he gets.  There isn't so much   
   verbal dialog.  It has    
   problems.  I'm bogged down in it.   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)