From: mdhangton@gmail.com   
      
   On Monday, September 8, 2014 11:17:39 PM UTC-4, Christopher J. Henrich wrote:   
   > Looks basically OK. I have a few, very slight, changes in punctuation   
   >    
   > and layout to suggest.   
   >    
   > In article ,   
   >    
   > William Vetter  wrote:   
   >    
   >    
   >    
   > > Please look at the way I've punctuated this.   
   >    
   > >     
   >    
   > >       I wasn't allowed to speak English to them, so I said    
   >    
   > > the weather poem Odette taught me,    
   >    
   > A colon instead of a comma after "me".   
   >    
   > >       "Rouge le soir,    
   >    
   > >         bel espoir,    
   >    
   > >       Rouge le matin,    
   >    
   > >         de la pluie en chemin."   
   >    
   > No indentation of "They...", so that it is all one paragraph.   
   >    
   > >       They only knew a few words of Broken French, so they    
   >    
   > > changed it into    
   >    
   > >       "Rouj bonswa,    
   >    
   > >         boule orevwa,    
   >    
   > >       Rouj mwen,    
   >    
   > >         fini anyen,"   
   >    
   > > and sang it like a song.   
   >    
   > >    
   >    
   > >    
   >    
   > > Yeah, I know I'm torturing the reader with French and Haitian Kreyol.   
   >    
   > Fiddlesticks. French and Kreyol are what this little bit of the story   
   >    
   > is all about. And obviously the larger story is set in Haiti, where   
   >    
   > Kreyol is the language of the poor and French the language of the rich;   
   >    
   > the reader who is "tortured" by the presence of these languages is much   
   >    
   > too dainty to be reading the story at all.    
   >    
   It's 3000yrs in a burned out future, in a port town at the head of the   
   Mississippi Delta that that has sunk into the mud, been flooded and erased by   
   the meandering river, and invaded by Caribbeans a half dozen times.  The POV   
   character is a 12yo    
   Vietnamese slave girl who has been brought on a trip there from a remote   
   settlement in Colorado.  Her guardian, who was mistress to the president of a   
   French pharmaceutical company 3000yrs earlier, has told her to speak only   
   French in Louisiana, on the    
   theory that the people they meet will assume they are Acadians.  Here the POV   
   character is entertaining some younger, local black children she has been left   
   with.   
      
   The first is a sailor's rhyme that says a red sunrise means the weather is   
   changing; the second version is common phrases jumbled together that suggest a   
   part of the plot.   
      
   I'm afraid the ms. has fragments of Navajo and Cherokee in it also.   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)