From: A_Tina_Hall@kruemel.org   
      
   Please comment what you think, an explanation follows after this:   
      
   __Seasons and Elements__   
   (_Controlled  by Magic_)   
   By A. T. Hall.   
      
   ****   
   	-[	]-	____-200____	..	NE_of_Fire	   
      
   "We have to take her back to her people." He almost looked up, but then   
   closed his eyes, just caught himself from taking a deep breath. It was   
   warm, dry, but the cave's walls were far too close. He returned his gaze   
   to the scarred young Breeder on the ground. The girl lay as if merely   
   sleeping, her scent nearly gone completely. Jeahnira, their just as   
   young Priest was healing her injuries, but the boy couldn't draw out her   
   mind.   
      
   "If we approach the softies, they'll think _we_ did that to her."   
   Jeahnira's mother replied.   
      
   She would know, he thought, and he wouldn't put it past them. They had   
   never gotten on with those neighbours, but there were others that would   
   react differently. "Let's at least circle round and try to warn the   
   other tribes. We don't know whether any of our Lords made it." he tried   
   again. Sitting here wasting time wasn't in his nature.   
      
   "You know what it took to get here."   
      
   That was true. They wouldn't survive crossing the mountains, and if his   
   idea of the terrain was at all correct, it would take them at least a   
   year to circle around them to get to the nearest tribe. It had taken   
   years to catch up, trailing the warped ones, and then they had almost   
   run right into their grasp. Only Jeahnira's skill had prevented them   
   from being discovered.   
      
   Maybe they should have gone in the other direction for help, but that   
   would have taken even longer, and would have meant abandoning those that   
   were left behind by the warped ones. He had already abandoned too much.   
      
   They had picked up this girl like the others, and now wondered what to   
   do with her. Some of his own females were in no better state.   
      
   "What if _they_ are already there when we arrive?" she continued. "We   
   don't know where they went, and you know how fast they can travel. We   
   can just hope those wet sods get a grip on themselves and warn the other   
   tribes." She obviously didn't think any of their Lords had made it,   
   either. She looked at her son.   
      
   Jeahnira shook his head. "I've been trying to get hold of one of their   
   Priests for the past fifteen years, that isn't going to change just this   
   moment. Might as well try to catch a dream."   
      
   That didn't mean the young Priest would stop trying. Jeahnira had tried   
   to contact those that had fled, too, without success. The boy's mother   
   had said that it was amazing enough that he had reached anyone who   
   wasn't a Priest. She hadn't spoken what they both thought, that apart   
   from his Warrior sibling, the only one the boy had managed to contact   
   was his father.   
      
   But the ones that had fled were good Lords, they would hold out and   
   protect what was left of his tribe. They were as strong as his mate. She   
   was the one who took care of his people now. He couldn't, after all   
   those years without the few things that gave his existence a purpose,   
   life. He walked away, down a narrow passage, to flee his nature.   
      
   ********   
      
   A Steam friend is reading the story again, giving feedback, and has a   
   huge amount of problems with info being missing in this scene.   
      
   I added this scene much later after writing the actual beginning, to   
   show a small group 200 days before the story starts, to be maybe kept in   
   mind, and later realize, oh, those people they talk about aren't dead at   
   all! Wonder when they'll turn up.   
      
   They do turn up in the 2nd book, while writing it was totally out of the   
   blue, which I didn't like, so I added this bit before the first scene of   
   the story, as kind of prologue.   
      
   It's meant to be cryptic, and it's meant to not contain infodumps or too   
   much about who, where, why.   
      
   I can see people agreeing with my friend, that this is too thin. If you   
   do, any ideas what to do?   
      
   If not, please let me know that, too. :)   
      
   I feel a bit as if someone had told Da Vinci that the Mona Lisa needs a   
   moustache. Butbut, my vision! But of course I want the story to work for   
   not just me, so, please help. :)   
      
   (I wonder whether I ever put this in here before for crit. Hm. /me goes   
   searching. Found it. Didn't get many comments though, and this is a   
   newer version, with some stuff added based on the comments.)   
      
   --   
   (Lanar) Maybe you should go after them to make sure he doesn't run off with our   
   mother." - "He has quite enough Breeders of his own." Aranar pointed out, then   
   smiled. "Besides, he'd send her back after a day at most, after she confused   
   him   
   enough to think he's a Magic Priest."                  -- Seasons & Elements   
   2/3   
      
      
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    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)