From: ddfr@daviddfriedman.nopsam.com   
      
   In article <9IadneKwcpSUSzPVnZ2dnUVZ_trinZ2d@earthlink.com>,   
    David Harmon  wrote:   
      
   > My primary point is, if a woman wants to communicate effectively with   
   > a man, she should state what it is that she wants to communicate   
   > clearly and directly, rather than sending mixed messages and supposed   
   > hints.   
   >   
      
   At a slight tangent, how do people feel about this in the contest not of   
   "do I want to go to bed with you" but of "am I interested in any sort of   
   potential romantic relationship?"   
      
   One of the most unpleasant experience of my life, a very long time ago,   
   was when I was in love with a woman who (ex post) wasn't at that point   
   interested in me. She never came out and said that she wasn't   
   interested--merely didn't encourage suggestions for getting together (we   
   were geographically separated at that point, since I had graduated from   
   college and she, I think, was still in her last year), said she would   
   call back and didn't.   
      
   On the one hand, I ought to have gotten the obvious hints from her   
   behavior. On the other hand, men in love are very unwilling to believe   
   that their quest is hopeless, so it would have taken a fairly clear "I   
   am sorry, but I'm really not interested" to convince me without the   
   painful period of gradual recognition that actually occurred.   
      
   Any opinions on which approach the woman in that situation (more   
   generally, the uninterested half of the relationship) ought to take?   
      
   --   
    http://www.daviddfriedman.com/ http://daviddfriedman.blogspot.com/   
    Author of _Harald_, a fantasy without magic.   
    Published by Baen, paperback in bookstores now   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)