XPost: alt.fan.states.delaware, alt.bathroom, alt.fan.rush-limbaugh   
   XPost: talk.politics.guns, sac.politics   
   From: nospam@ix.netcom.com   
      
   Alleged “Delco Pooper” Christina Solometo smiled in her mug shot and   
   laughed in front of news cameras Thursday as she was led away in   
   handcuffs to face charges for allegedly defecating on the hood of   
   another motorist’s car, smiling, and then driving away during what   
   police said was a road rage incident this week.   
      
   When reached by phone Friday, Solometo said: “I cannot wait to talk, but   
   guess what? I have to refer you to the lawyer.”   
      
   But before she did, Solometo promised: “It will be a great story.”   
      
   “Road ragers don’t smile,” she said.   
      
   A message left for the number Solometo gave for her attorney was not   
   immediately returned.   
      
   Meanwhile, instead of leaning away — very far away — from Solometo, the   
   people of Delaware County have leaned in with memes, nicknames, and even   
   a new food dish created in her honor.   
      
   I never thought I’d say this, but it’s gotten Delco enough for me for   
   one year. I’d like to wave my county flag and get off this roller   
   coaster ride, please.   
      
   Solometo, 44, of Ridley Park, was charged with indecent exposure,   
   disorderly conduct, criminal mischief, harassment, and depositing waste   
   on a highway for the Wednesday afternoon incident at Fourth and Madison   
   Avenues that was captured on video and quickly went viral.   
      
   Prospect Park Police Chief David Madonna said the incident was a result   
   of road rage.   
      
   According to the affidavit, Solometo told police that she was in a line   
   of cars to turn left at a light and honked at a driver in front of her   
   who did not move when the arrow was green.   
      
   Solometo allegedly said the other motorist mocked her in her rearview   
   mirror and she was having stomach issues so she drove around the car and   
   turned left. She told police she believed the other vehicle started   
   following her, which is why she got out to confront them. The driver of   
   the other car allegedly insulted Solometo, which she told police made   
   her angry.   
      
   “Solometo said, ‘I wanted to punch her in the face, but I pooped on her   
   car instead and went home,’” according to the affidavit.   
      
   Police said she later told them: “It was a clean poop. I didn’t even   
   have to wipe.”   
      
   Listen, unless you are actively seated on a bidet, there is no poop that   
   doesn’t need a good wipe, and preferably, several. (Why do I have to   
   keep writing sentences I can‘t even believe I have to write?!?) But   
   Solometo has an Only Fans account. Could this all be a ploy to promote   
   it? Perhaps.   
      
   Video shows Solometo throwing her head back in laughter Thursday as   
   she’s taken into custody and walked before news cameras. When asked by a   
   reporter what happened, she says: “The lady chased me. She chased me and   
   I asked her not to attack me.”   
      
   Then, someone in the background asks a question I can‘t believe someone   
   asked. And I sure as heck hope it wasn’t a journalist, because that   
   would bring our whole average down.   
      
   “What‘d you eat that day?” they said.   
      
   “I have a sickness,” Solometo replied.   
      
   The case has gained national attention and was featured on TMZ. In   
   Delco, residents made memes likening the doo-dooer to the “hawk tuah”   
   girl and they bestowed her with nicknames, like the “Delco Deucer,”   
   which inspired a dish of the same name by Wolf’s Superior Sandwiches of   
   Aston. The Delco Deucer sandwich comes with barbecue brisket, chorizo   
   beef chili, cheddar, ranch, red onion, and fried pickles and it looks   
   disgusting.   
      
   Like this story, I predict it will be a huge hit in Delco.   
      
   https://www.inquirer.com/news/christina-solometo-delco-pooper-arrested-20   
   250502.html   
      
   https://nypost.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2025/05/christina-solometo-   
   ridley-park-accused-103685421.jpg?quality=75&strip=all&w=1200   
      
   --- SoupGate-DOS v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)