From: hounddog23x@gmail.com   
      
   Jackson County man devotes life to caring for wife with Alzheimer's   
      
   Chris Hottensen   
   Gary and Deena Jatho will celebrate their 54th anniversary Jan. 21. Deena was   
   diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease three years ago, but Gary has not left her   
   side, continuing to provide 24-hour care to the love of his life. Gary helps   
   Deena do therapy at    
   home, hoping to put off as long as he can her going to a nursing home.   
      
   Gary and Deena Jatho will celebrate their 54th anniversary Jan. 21. Deena was   
   diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease three years ago, but Gary has not left her   
   side, continuing to provide 24-hour care to the love of his life. Gary helps   
   Deena do therapy at    
   home, hoping to put off as long as he can her going to a nursing home.   
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   VERGENNES -- When Gary Jatho said his vows almost 54 years ago, he meant every   
   word of them.   
      
   The Vergennes resident has refused to leave his wife Deena's side, faithfully   
   taking care of her the last three years after she was diagnosed with   
   Alzheimer's disease.    
      
   "I took my wedding vows serious," Gary said with tears welling up in his eyes.   
   "The preacher said to take her for better or for worse. I feel like that's my   
   job to take care of her."   
      
   Gary is not alone.   
      
   More than 15 million Americans provide unpaid, ongoing care to the 5.2 million   
   Americans with the memory-robbing disease, according to a report released by   
   the Alzheimer's Association.    
      
   But with only 21 percent of caregivers age 65 and older and only 29 percent   
   men, the 73-year-old husband is a bit of an anomaly.   
      
   The First Signs    
      
   Gary first noticed signs of his 78-year-old wife's dementia in 2011 when she   
   became confused performing everyday household chores.    
      
   "She'd forget where the dishes went to or where stuff was at and now she wants   
   to wash the dishes," Gary said. "I'll wash them and put them in a drain pan   
   and if I don't put them up, then I've got to find them. She hides them from   
   me, so I don't know    
   where they went to."   
      
   Playing hide-and-seek with the dishes provided only a mild inconvenience -- if   
   not at times an amusing one to Gary -- but when she put food on the stove to   
   cook and forgot about it, he was forced to come to grips with the seriousness   
   of his wife's    
   forgetfulness.   
      
   Gary's response was to do something he hadn't done in 70-plus years -- learn   
   to cook.    
      
   "I said, 'I've never cooked a meal in my life, but with the good Lord's help,   
   I'll manage.'"   
      
   Making sacrifices   
      
   Gary and Deena raised Holstein calves together on their 50-acre farm, but Gary   
   had to sell them so he can dedicate virtually all his time to taking care of   
   his wife.    
      
   "That was a big enjoyment for us -- day-old calves and we bottle fed them,"   
   Gary said. "We had a lot of fun out of it. She enjoyed going out there and   
   feeding them. I've wanted to go back into them, but the condition she's in, I   
   can't do it."   
      
   In addition to doing all the cooking and cleaning, Gary administers her   
   medicine, dresses her, helps her do therapy and takes her to the bathroom   
   every two hours -- even in the middle of the night -- because she no longer   
   knows when she needs to go.   
      
   But he hasn't grown bitter or resentful at spending his golden years taking   
   care of someone who one day will not remember what he's done or who he is.   
      
   "I love her and I want to see her taken care of," Gary said.    
      
   The only time he leaves her side is to make a quick run to Walmart or to do a   
   favor for a neighbor -- hauling water and gravel or mowing grass.   
      
   Willis Durbin has been on the receiving end of one of Gary's favors and he   
   called him a compassionate and conscientious man who has sacrificed much for   
   his wife.   
      
   "I do believe he ought to be husband of the year and that stems from the fact   
   he's given up what he loves to do, which is farm," Durbin said.   
      
   'Meant to be together'   
      
   The couple met in 1958 at Gary's high school graduation and have been   
   inseparable ever since, spending as many moments as possible together raising   
   calves, hauling water to neighbors, family and friends and building their   
   house together.   
      
   She also helped him bale hay, running the tractor and baler while he stacked   
   the bales on the wagon.   
      
   Deena was there for Gary after a bridge he was attempting to remove fell on   
   top of him, breaking his back, pelvis, rib, leg, crushing his foot, damaging   
   his spleen and destroying one kidney.   
      
   "I was hurt pretty bad and she took care of me for a couple months -- got me   
   back on my feet," Gary said. "She took care of everything at the house."   
      
   When the couple met in 1961, many said the relationship wouldn't work. They   
   were nothing alike, but they learned to appreciate the differences.   
      
   "I guess the good Lord meant for us to be together," Gary said. "A lot of them   
   said we'll never live together. She's patient and don't get in a hurry, and I   
   get all excited and get in a hurry. People said that'll never work."   
      
   They proved everyone wrong. On Jan. 21, they'll celebrate their 54th   
   anniversary.   
      
   Even with her memory clouded, Deena remains proud to be with her husband,   
   repeating often as she points at Gary, "We've been married for several years."   
      
   Helpful advice   
      
   Gary has learned a thing or two about taking care a loved one fighting   
   Alzheimer's disease.   
      
   "Don't holler at them," Gary said. "Keep your voice down and praise them a   
   lot. This morning she started doing her therapy and I told her, 'Honey, you're   
   doing great.' Anything they do halfway right, praise them because it helps   
   them. It helps her a lot."   
      
   Even though her mind has been changed, he doesn't treat her with any less   
   respect than he did before the disease.   
      
      
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