From: hounddog23x@gmail.com   
      
   Friday, June 30, 2006   
      
   Beware the techniques of the Sociopath   
      
      
   Dr. Martha Stout, in her book 'The Sociopath Next Door', discusses the   
   techniques of the sociopath - what she refers to as 'the tools of the trade'.   
   The first technique she talks about is charm. Dr. Stout believes it is "a   
   primary characteristic of    
   sociopathy. The intense charm of people who have no conscience, a kind of   
   inexplicable charisma, has been observed and commented on by countless   
   victims, and by researchers who attempt to catalog the diagnostic signs of   
   sociopathy. It is a potent    
   characteristic". Dr. Robert Hare and Dr. Paul Babiak talk about the role of   
   charm during the interview process in their latest book "Snakes in Suits -   
   When Psychopaths Go To Work". According to the book, "one of the most   
   effective skills psychopaths use    
   to get the trust of people is their ability to charm them. Some psychopaths   
   lay the charm on too thick, coming across as glib, superficial, and   
   unconvincing. Hower, the truly talented ones have raised their ability to   
   charm people to that of an art,    
   priding themselves on their ability to present a fictional self to others that   
   is convincing, taken at face value, and difficult to penetrate". One must   
   always keep in mind that the charm, like manipulation, can be very subtle.   
      
   Seduction is another common technique of the sociopath. According to Dr. Stout   
   "people without conscience have an uncanny sense of who will be vulnerable to   
   a sexual overture". But seduction is not llimited to sexual relationships;   
   sociopaths can and    
   will seduce family, friends and colleagues with their acting skills.   
   Sociopaths will seduce others for power, money, control and sex.   
      
   The pity play is next on the list of sociopathic techniques. It's okay to pity   
   someone who has gone through difficult times, but if you find yourself feeling   
   sorry for someone's sad story, make sure the story is true. The pity play   
   should be a warning    
   sign to all of us.   
      
   Projection and gaslighting are also on the list of common sociopathic   
   techniques. Sociopaths refuse to be held accountable for their behavior and   
   often assign their own behavior to their victims. For example, a sociopath   
   could accuse a victim of stealing    
   when it is the sociopath himself that steals. Gaslighting is a common practice   
   of abusers who attempt to convince their victims they are defective for any   
   reason such as making the victim more emotional, more needy or dependent. For   
   example, if an    
   abusive person says hurtful things and tries to convince you that you are   
   mentally unstable and starts recommending that you get professional help, you   
   might be in the presence of a gaslilghter.   
      
   According to Dr. Hare and Dr. Babiak, psychopaths are always on the lookout   
   for individuals to scam or swindle. The psychopathic approach includes three   
   phases: the assessment phase, the manipulation phase and the abandonment   
   phase. "Some psychopaths are    
   opportunistic, aggressive predators who wil take advantage of almost anyone   
   they meet, while others are more patient, waiting for the perfect, innocent   
   victim to cross their path. In each case, the psychopath is constantly sizing   
   up the potential    
   usefulness of an individual as a source of money, power, sex or influence".   
   The authors go on to say that some psychopaths enjoy a challenge while others   
   prey on people who are vulnerable. This could include people who are lonely or   
   people who need    
   emotional support, elderly people or those who have been recently hurt or   
   victimized. During the assessment phase, the psychopath is able to determine a   
   potential victim's weak points and will use those weak points to seduce.    
      
   Once the psychopath has identified a victim, the manipulation phase begins.   
   During the manipulation phase, a psychopath may create a persona or mask,   
   specifically designed to 'work' for his or her target. A psychopath will lie   
   to gain the trust of their    
   victim. A psychopath's lack of empathy and guilt allows them to lie with ease   
   - "they don't see the value of telling the truth unless it will help get them   
   what they want".    
      
   In Chapter 4 of the book "Snakes in Suits", Dr. Hare and Dr. Babiak write:   
      
   "As interaction with you proceeds, the psychopath carefully assesses your   
   persona. Your persona gives the psychopath a picture of the traits and   
   characteristics you value in yourself. Your persona may also reveal, to an   
   astute observer, insecurities or    
   weaknesses you wish to minimize or hide from view. As an ardent student of   
   human behavior, the psychopath will then gently test the inner strengths and   
   needs that are part of your private self and eventually build a personal   
   relationship with you by    
   communicating (through words and deeds) four important messages".    
      
   According to the book the four messages that the psychopath communicates are   
   1) I like who you are; 2) I am just like you; 3) Your secrets are safe with   
   me; and 4) I am the perfect friend or lover or partner for you.    
      
   Dr. Hare and Dr. Babiak sum up the differences between a real bond between two   
   people who meet each other and have much in common and the psychopathic bond   
   quite well:   
      
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)