XPost: soc.culture.ukrainian, soc.culture.europe, soc.culture.usa   
   XPost: soc.culture.netherlands, soc.culture.nordic, soc.culture.france   
   From: michaelo@ukr.net   
      
   Attention! Non normative lexic.   
      
   There are aged creation which are actual even today.   
   One of such creations is a piece of classic of modern ukrainian   
   literature,   
   Lés Poderewjanski.   
   For your entertainment the piece:   
      
               Hamlet as a phenomenon of russificated Ukraine.   
      
   Characters:   
      
   Hamlet - danish russificated ukrainian   
   lady Margaret - mother of Hamlet   
   Clavdius - lustful uncle of the prince   
   the Ghost  - horrible guy wrapped with badly smelling dirty coverlet   
   Sigmund Freud - famous psychiatrist   
      
      
   Fist act.   
      
   It's the sea coast. Sounds the immodest beastly voices of seabirds,   
   the screaming of walrus, and also other sounds of several sea beasts.   
   The danish prince Hamlet comes onto the beach. He is dressed in   
   good looking accurate russian shirt in style of Lev Tolstoy,   
   and same kind of canvas trousers. A belt put on him goodly.   
   He has a beard, he's foots are bare, and he's keeping in his hand   
   big hard wooden stick.   
      
   Hamlet:   
       -I'm tired to bathe each time. Or will I bathe?   
   To bathe or not to bathe, this fucking question trick my balls.   
   Should I drop down my trousers, without hesitations,   
   and swim in style of butterfly, until the lost of mind behind the   
   beacons.   
   And what is then? What aftermathes for me are waiting?   
   Just only ones, and big fuck is coming with its beastly smile.   
   A lot of sicknesses it brings, as cold, hemorrhoid, boil on a bales,   
   and hemotoma after syringes, hospitals, and finally the humid grave...   
   Over the grave is one ophely with unfresh smellage, and bunch of   
   margerets.   
   And a down of them, is a dumb dare man who loved to bathe.   
   No such sophisticated variants comprehensively I fucked.   
      
   Hamlet spit out to the sea and fuck beat it with his stick.   
   In this moment comes Clavdius, the lustful uncle of the prince.   
      
   Clavdius:   
       -Mine dear Hamlet, come with me. In my nestle office room,   
   I'll give you not shitty sucker. This sucker is as sweet as hope,   
   and it's completely made of natural ingredients.   
      
   Clavdius disgusting champ with his leaps   
   to represent the sweetness of not shitty sucker.   
   In this moment the Ghost in dirty coverlet is crowing from the sea.   
      
   the Ghost:   
       -Don't believe, my son, this perverter.   
   He'll plug you ass hole with that sweet.   
      
   Clavdius:   
       - Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah   
      
   He escapes quickly.   
      
   the Ghost:   
       - Oh, he is scared, as could you see.   
   This fucking funk pissed on my when I was hardly sleeping. It was on a   
   hunting.   
   By his insidious hand he aimed on my ear his dirty dik.   
   And since it my goodly body the deadly gangrene has cross- cunt fucked.   
   I want revenge! I want to see this fallen beast in prison's toilet   
   to play in love with brutal murder, or in the insolvent factory   
   where he must work a fucking engineer, or in the wild village   
   where savages must fuck him in his ass.   
      
   Hamlet:   
       - We should not revenge an any one. We must love all perverters,   
   avid jacks, and murders. Because an every one of then is a human,   
   and each of them is going under God.   
      
   the Ghost:   
       - Don't you eat meat, at all?   
      
   Hamlet:   
       - No. I principally don't eat any meat. I only love to drink some   
   times,   
   because we're hospitable people who's soul 's wide and we could drink a   
   lot.   
   Much then any strangers as jews and negros.   
      
   the Ghost:   
       - It's fucking habit of the vogue. It's new somebody's wind in   
   danish   
   kingdom. When I was king I fucked all people who's going under God,   
   including Lev Tolstoy. But it's, of course, an allegory,   
   because sins childhood I hated gays. I sent them all on toxic   
   industries,   
   to work for goodness of the land. Oh, times, oh unhappy Dania.   
      
   Hamlet:   
       - You, father, probably had fucked you brain, in your land of   
   ghosts.   
   You are fuckly spelling something such that I can not piss out during   
   the whole   
   week. But I told you, we can not revenge,   
   because all the people are brother on the Earth, but jews, negros,   
   niggers,   
   belorussians, whose I hate. But in general I'm big humanist, not as you,   
   my dad.   
   You always loved to drink hard drinks, and fuck my poor mother such that   
   smoke was flowing out the chimney. And then you drank a russian tea,   
   fucked up toilet by boots, and also I note about you a lot of other   
   fucking faults. Why did you make your weaker brother to suck your dik?   
   I do not surprise that, he had fucked down. My poor mother hate you,   
   as I hate jews. She loved and petted me. We often played in "hen and   
   cock".   
   You, father, get fuck back in your sea, because I'll strike you with my   
   stick.   
   Or even worse, I'll call my uncle, and together will beat you such that   
   Dania will shake.   
      
   the Ghost:   
       - Oh, you're the son of a beach, and mother fucker !   
   How could you dare to say such to you father ? Why didn't I threw you in   
   the   
   water when you was born ? Why didn't I plug you head in ass to smother ?   
   Oh, kurwa's family! But wait, just give me time!   
      
   The Ghost is sinking in the sea.   
      
   Hamlet:   
       - My fucking dad, has fucked my mind. I'll go to cafe - bar to get   
   some   
   soviet's champagne, because I'm feeling such,   
   as that stray cat has pissed in my soul.   
   I unconsciously want to lick my hot teeth by my ragged tongue.   
      
   Hamlet fars. Walrus screams, birds give a cry, the sea is noisy.   
      
      
   Second act.   
      
      
   At the edge of the board is a french piano.   
   At the piano is a metal cam with cheap delicious fish.   
   At the centre of the board is a big big russian arm chair,   
   which is made absolutely tasteless. Above it is hanged a national   
   blazon.   
   The main figure of the blazon is a bear. In one of its hand the bear   
   is keeping a hammer.   
   In his other hand it keeps a russain musical instrument with 3 strings.   
   This design symbolize ability the nation to labor and relaxation.   
   The lady Margaret, Hamlet's mother, is sitting in the chair.   
   She's embroidering some russian dress. She sings the song "russian   
   mosquitos".   
   Eventually, with soft walk of pederast comes Clavdius, lust uncle of the   
   prince.   
      
   Clavdius:   
       - Today, I've been walking at the coast with you sweet son.   
   I willed to give him very good and tasty sucker, but he, ass hole,   
   rejected it.   
      
   lady Margaret:   
       - What a freak, I swear.   
      
   Clavdius (to the side)   
       -I'll fuck him up.   
       (to lady Margaret)   
       - My sucker, is not shitty.   
      
   lady Margaret:   
       -You are such a spoiler.   
      
   Clavdius:   
       -It's badly air in this room, as somebody had put the wind,   
   or went not to toilet, but to here.   
   Open the window, bastards, to fresh the wind!   
      
   Two bastards, dressed in second hand, get up, and quickly open the   
   window.   
   In that same moment, though the window the Ghost fly in.   
      
   the Ghost:   
       -So, didn't you wait for me, ass holes?   
   Now, all drop down your trousers, and lean ahead!   
   Your end has come, be ready, fucking masons, or that who you are.   
      
   Clavdius, lady Margaret, and bastards quickly fulfill the respective   
   order   
   of the Ghost. And he is violently laughing and flying in the room.   
      
   Clavdius:   
       - Mine Ghost, we are not guilty. We feel the hate and anger to all   
      
   [continued in next message]   
      
   --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05   
    * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)